WEBVTT

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currency isn't money currency is the value proposition upon which you make decisions john i've been places in the world where the dollar has no significance yeah but a carton of cigarettes is gold you know and gold only matters in places where beauty is is appreciated right so what's the currency and we all have this currency and you need to do some deep dive and understand what your currency is if you and i are fighting and i'm remembering and you're learning i'm gonna win because remembering is faster than learning and it's like real i'm like no it's

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like you're still gonna learn for me kuros is a cat yeah and the last thing is you know kuros criteria it's a it's courage it's creators catalyst and that's complacency and complacency is a kill it's in the supply chain of every disaster every it's in the cocktail of any it's

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just always there and people tell them like man there's no for me there's no discipline about not being complacent other than just staying curious like curiosity complacency they're incompatible like they're so if you're curious not asking questions by default you reject complacency

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So there's no like how to become this one.

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I always think curious because if I stay curious by default,

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I'm injecting.

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Right.

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Raw,

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uncut,

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unapologetic.

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Welcome to Men Talking Mindfulness.

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All right,

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everyone.

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Welcome back to Men Talking Mindfulness.

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We're actually recording here in studio here in Dallas.

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We're in Dallas,

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Texas,

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and I'm here in Purposeful Productions.

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So thank you for this,

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Austin,

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for the point.

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You know,

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we want to run the litigation.

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Purposeful Productions.

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Purposeful.

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productions in Plano.

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Frisco,

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Canada.

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We're actually in Plano.

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We're in Plano.

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Okay,

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sorry.

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You know,

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don't let the door let you fuck it all up.

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We can sideway people pretty quick.

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Don't get sad.

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It's like saying,

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hey,

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are you from Brooklyn?

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No,

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I'm from the Bronx.

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And just lump it up.

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Okay,

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all right.

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Very true.

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Maybe not that.

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That's a pretty.

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I don't know where the hell I am.

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You know,

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it may not be that.

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I'm on the show.

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John's waiting to do our intro.

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No,

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it's off.

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No,

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so.

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In spirit,

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it's that intense,

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but not.

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I told you this was going to be a less formal.

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I love it.

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I love it.

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So,

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like,

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normally we read our stuff.

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But,

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hey,

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we're here with Clint Bruce.

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Clint,

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welcome,

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brother.

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Hey,

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thanks,

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man.

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Good to be here.

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Good to be with you all.

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Clint,

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a fellow former Frogman.

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He also played in the NFL for a brief stint.

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He went to the Naval Academy.

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Yeah.

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Not one of the best classes,

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96.

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01 was probably.

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I was 97.

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97,

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aren't you?

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Yeah,

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but football in 96.

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Oh,

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God.

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That's what helped me become a 97.

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Ah,

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gotcha.

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Winning football games in 96.

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there you go yeah everyone the aloha bowl we want a bowl game you can go oh thank you yeah but mbp at that game a athletic overachievement academic under that's how you is it's an arbitrage between athletic and and all bra no brains got that was always but i was trying i'm good i tell me it's like hey listen if you try the instructors as

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long as it's within their moral and ethical spectrum they'll like he's trying i like that he was trying he's just dumb

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Hardly.

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We'll carry you in this conversation.

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No,

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we got you.

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We'll carry you in this conversation.

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So anyway,

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after transitioning from active duty,

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Clint,

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you founded multiple businesses,

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nonprofits.

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They're all rooted in leadership,

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service,

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and purpose.

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And you speak widely on community,

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vulnerability,

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and living with intention.

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And that's a lot of what we're going to cover today.

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Good.

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We're super excited to get in this conversation.

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Before we do that,

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we'll...

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over to your brother not much to like hey like men talking mindfulness for what we're doing check it out like we have you know a lot of stuff coming up but i just want to get in this conversation with with clint uh it's great to have you here thank you i mean we've done a quite a bit of research on you so we're really excited to dive in to see i know it was like we didn't verify uncover like oh you didn't run my fico like my credit like wow um you know your fico is i'm like yeah i know well

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let's let's ground our you feel my you steal my id you're going to lose your eye.

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You don't talk about ID.

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Well,

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let's do,

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we ground our show with doing one breath grounding practice just to kind of chill out a little bit.

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But we'll just do that one breath now.

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So maybe close your eyes or just kind of soften a little bit.

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We'll just start a nice little exhale out your mouth.

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Let it go.

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Feel yourself kind of grounding deeper into your seat.

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And let's take a big inhale through your nose.

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Bigger breath,

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a little bit bigger.

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And let's hold it for three,

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two,

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and one.

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And exhale,

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let it go.

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And even our production guy,

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he said a little prayer for us,

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which was like,

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we're definitely in the South.

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And he was like,

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he was pilling it on a little prayer.

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I felt like the Lord coming in for our podcast today.

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That's a prayer you'll let the Mastiffs get cool with.

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Most of the time,

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you're like,

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finish up.

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Mastiffs are getting cool.

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You're like,

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I'll deal with some.

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cool match that is man that's a prayer right there awesome throwing heat exactly um all right man so clint man like i said in the intro there played football at navy played a little bit of football with the saints the ravens i didn't actually talk about the teams um and then clearly you were in the seal teams yeah um

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And you've done the entrepreneurial work,

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right?

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So for guys listening right now,

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something Will and I have started doing is we want to ask the big picture question right off the bat because some people,

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hey,

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they've got two minutes and they can't just do an intro.

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Yeah.

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So what do you hope people walk away from this interview with?

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That's all.

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Yeah,

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I mean,

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my passion is helping people define their high ground and then get to it and stay there,

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you know?

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Yeah.

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And define it,

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get to it.

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And then what a lot of people don't think about is,

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hey,

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man,

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how do I stay?

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How do I hold the high ground once I get there?

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So that's...

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what I love doing.

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I love helping guys find the high ground post-service,

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post-athletic careers,

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get there and hold it.

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And sometimes you got to really recalibrate what they think the high ground is,

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right?

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So I love doing that professionally and philanthropically.

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I feel really blessed to have been able to do that for quite a few years here.

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So yeah,

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you have a high ground.

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You can get to it.

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It may not be what you thought it was.

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Often it isn't,

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but once you find it,

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get there and hold it.

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And everybody has the .

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potential to do that for sure and that for for those who are listening who may not be familiar with what you mean by the high ground what it is yeah so i'm sure you get this i get this all the time you know one of the questions i get asked all the time especially when i'm speaking to groups or teams or whatever especially

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on room full of men if it's like a football team or something they go hey what's your favorite gun and that's a natural question like there's nothing wrong with it it's probably what i'd ask me too but it's not the question i want to answer so i always pivot off they go hey you're asking what my favorite gun is or what my favorite weapon is

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and the younger they are and the more male though the faster they'll go it's the same thing but the older they are the more diverse the crowd is yeah kind of nod their head knowingly even if they don't know what the answer is and i'll always lean i go hey listen a gun is a tool a weapon is what i use to win so

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my favorite weapon is a map map because once i have a map i have everything i know where the bad gal be you know what to come in what to bring with leave how to get home and if we have a map the worst will ever be is wrong

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but we won't be lost and wrong and lost are different right yeah you know and and i've been both i've been wrong and i've been lost and i hate them both but i will take wrong over lost any day because if you're wrong it's just a matter of realizing it remember where you said you wanted to go availing yourself to the wisdom of those who are there now who have been where you want to go and the camaraderie of those want to get their ballet as you do and then you just got to do the work right but being lost is terrifying like any move could be wrong it's paralytic and yeah

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And kind of when I describe my life biographically to kind of get to your answer is I describe my life by anybody has their own version of this.

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This is just I'm a visual guy.

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I describe my life biographically as I've lived on the ball field,

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the battlefield,

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the boardroom and the breakfast table.

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Now,

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the ball field describes my season life,

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literally describes my season life as an athlete.

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I grew up here,

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Dallas-Fort Worth area,

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played football at the Naval Academy,

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played in the NFL.

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No one knows I played in the NFL because when I was at the Ravens,

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I played the same position as Ray Lewis.

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Oh,

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he was.

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he's all right man he was all right and uh yeah i remember you to practice one day this is so this was 1997.

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so it was his second year and he hadn't become ray yet but we all knew he's like one of the greatest without question and um and he's very cerebral he's very deep very passionate like i tell people like hey that ray you see with the finest like that's him that's there's no pretense there that's just who he is and

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uh i do remember in a practice one day because i've been selected for the teams too.

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So here I am.

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the two,

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you know,

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opportunity to play in the NFL and have been selected for the community.

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And

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I wanted to serve.

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There was no part of me that didn't want to serve,

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but we had done things in such a way that,

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you know,

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I could play that first season and then go to Buds and then come back out with kind of a Dave Robinson thing.

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And

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I remember at practice one day watching him do something,

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and I was like,

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man,

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it might be easier to come in ABC than it would be out there.

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So,

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you know,

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so the

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ball to discuss my season live as an athlete what a thought like yeah all right do i beat out ray lewis or do i go or do i make it through something that historically has a 10 percent retention nine percent just like hard huh yeah i mean the math was far

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in a way more favorable for making it to seal trade yeah and uh you know the the battlefield describes my season life being a a member of the SEAL teams.

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i love being a member of the seal teams but i love more having been a member of the united states military yeah and john i'll tell you like we're we're one finger on a fist on an arm on a body that is united states military and it was a privilege to to be that finger thank you for service thanks for being worth it man god as well yeah thanks for being worth it and uh yeah appreciate that so and then i like that that response thing yeah being worried about that for i

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think probably 12 years kind of right after i started carrying load yeah and someone goes He thinks for sure as to go,

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thanks for being worthy.

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and kind of caught him off guard.

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And they go,

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what do you mean?

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I said,

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well,

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that's what we're thinking.

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Like,

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we're over there missing our families,

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all this other stuff.

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I'm like,

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man,

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I hope these people are worth it.

250
00:09:48.779 --> 00:09:52.602
And then you come home and you meet someone that's doing more than they have to for people they don't know.

251
00:09:52.625 --> 00:09:52.985
And you're like,

252
00:09:53.000 --> 00:09:53.203
okay,

253
00:09:53.321 --> 00:09:53.946
they're worth it.

254
00:09:53.947 --> 00:09:54.321
So it's like,

255
00:09:54.461 --> 00:09:56.805
there's like a reconciliation for us when you're like,

256
00:09:56.930 --> 00:09:57.149
okay,

257
00:09:57.164 --> 00:09:57.805
they were worth it,

258
00:09:57.906 --> 00:09:58.149
right?

259
00:09:58.188 --> 00:09:58.446
And so,

260
00:09:59.086 --> 00:10:01.774
and the challenge is that he continued to be worth it.

261
00:10:01.914 --> 00:10:04.008
And my job is to continue to be worth it because there's some young,

262
00:10:04.555 --> 00:10:07.633
strapping young lad on the side of the mountain protecting my freedom now.

263
00:10:07.680 --> 00:10:08.242
Sure.

264
00:10:08.946 --> 00:10:10.805
It's like Tom Hanks.

265
00:10:10.883 --> 00:10:11.758
Yeah.

266
00:10:13.017 --> 00:10:13.338
Yeah.

267
00:10:14.499 --> 00:10:16.261
And so the boardroom describes that season life.

268
00:10:16.720 --> 00:10:18.341
Now this is in the breakfast table is the,

269
00:10:18.642 --> 00:10:18.904
I mean,

270
00:10:18.943 --> 00:10:19.462
we're on that map.

271
00:10:19.486 --> 00:10:21.408
Our whole lives were born under a breakfast table.

272
00:10:22.205 --> 00:10:23.306
And sometimes that's great.

273
00:10:23.384 --> 00:10:24.345
Sometimes it can be better,

274
00:10:24.431 --> 00:10:25.767
but then we build a breakfast table.

275
00:10:26.587 --> 00:10:28.751
And so that's how I describe my life biographically,

276
00:10:28.752 --> 00:10:30.220
the way I run my life.

277
00:10:30.298 --> 00:10:31.392
Because if you don't have a map,

278
00:10:31.439 --> 00:10:32.189
you're not on a mission.

279
00:10:32.830 --> 00:10:33.455
You're on E and E.

280
00:10:33.611 --> 00:10:33.939
Right.

281
00:10:34.095 --> 00:10:35.345
And you know that as a,

282
00:10:35.501 --> 00:10:36.408
as a Red Wings guy.

283
00:10:36.736 --> 00:10:36.908
And

284
00:10:38.126 --> 00:10:38.361
I go,

285
00:10:39.477 --> 00:10:57.689
you know for now i i run my life i kind of guide and govern my life with a ball field mental physical health hey i take care of myself mentally and physically so conform at a high level for the number of days god gives me right the boredom am i providing for myself and my family and those entrusted me in a way that i'm proud of and where you get to keep the trophy right and

286
00:10:57.690 --> 00:11:05.799
the breakfast table or my bride and i building girls that love us in the matter to others and all three of those Those are a battlefield at best.

287
00:11:05.939 --> 00:11:06.283
Um,

288
00:11:06.881 --> 00:11:07.362
Graphically,

289
00:11:07.363 --> 00:11:09.824
it's like three discs with one disc going around them,

290
00:11:10.184 --> 00:11:13.649
three maps and then in the battlefield,

291
00:11:13.707 --> 00:11:14.270
at best,

292
00:11:14.528 --> 00:11:17.074
my everyday enemy is entropy and complacency.

293
00:11:18.293 --> 00:11:18.817
At worst,

294
00:11:18.871 --> 00:11:22.137
I have adversaries and competitors and enemies on these maps.

295
00:11:23.223 --> 00:11:26.582
But you tend to take everything more seriously when you realize you're in battle.

296
00:11:27.082 --> 00:11:27.645
And so for me,

297
00:11:29.067 --> 00:11:31.692
the high ground is where you always want to be on a network,

298
00:11:31.707 --> 00:11:31.910
right?

299
00:11:32.809 --> 00:11:34.170
And so very visually for me,

300
00:11:34.390 --> 00:11:35.451
my whole life is like going,

301
00:11:35.472 --> 00:11:35.591
Hey,

302
00:11:35.611 --> 00:11:37.392
what's the high ground mentally and physically?

303
00:11:37.435 --> 00:11:38.275
What's the high ground?

304
00:11:38.794 --> 00:11:41.634
And the boredom was high ground at the breakfast table and the way it would look.

305
00:11:41.697 --> 00:11:44.298
And you're seeing this in your mind's eye and I'll explain it for you.

306
00:11:44.322 --> 00:11:45.462
Um,

307
00:11:46.142 --> 00:11:46.541
there's these,

308
00:11:46.884 --> 00:11:47.126
you know,

309
00:11:47.345 --> 00:11:47.462
the,

310
00:11:47.463 --> 00:11:48.923
the breakfast table is the main party,

311
00:11:49.642 --> 00:11:49.908
you know,

312
00:11:50.564 --> 00:11:54.267
and then the ball feels like a bounding overwatch and the boredom is a,

313
00:11:54.595 --> 00:11:55.095
is like C2.

314
00:11:55.205 --> 00:12:00.517
And so these are three concurrent missions occurring at the same time.

315
00:12:00.611 --> 00:12:02.205
All they got to be supportive of each other.

316
00:12:03.362 --> 00:12:19.473
and um and for me it just works right so when i say what hey what is the high ground like what did you think the high ground was for mental physical performance and that changes over time would you i mean there's nothing more abundant than the disgruntled and depressed millionaire oh

317
00:12:19.520 --> 00:12:31.223
yeah so that's not what it is either that's what all of ecclesiastes is like so and and the reason it's so important to me is is you know i'm one of the hardest questions I ever get asked is who's your mentor?

318
00:12:32.053 --> 00:12:33.054
It's impossible.

319
00:12:33.153 --> 00:12:33.433
It's like,

320
00:12:33.834 --> 00:12:36.312
why would I ever deny myself the wisdom of somebody else?

321
00:12:36.473 --> 00:12:38.074
I have hundreds of mentors.

322
00:12:38.176 --> 00:12:38.316
Like,

323
00:12:38.355 --> 00:12:38.473
I'm,

324
00:12:39.133 --> 00:12:39.375
you know,

325
00:12:39.376 --> 00:12:40.719
and I crave that wisdom.

326
00:12:40.720 --> 00:12:43.117
Because if I get to remember what you had to learn the hard way,

327
00:12:43.195 --> 00:12:44.437
I don't have to learn it the hard way.

328
00:12:45.375 --> 00:12:45.515
Like,

329
00:12:45.516 --> 00:12:47.234
I was working with a UFC fighter one time.

330
00:12:47.235 --> 00:12:47.476
And I said,

331
00:12:47.477 --> 00:12:47.594
hey,

332
00:12:47.617 --> 00:12:47.734
man,

333
00:12:47.735 --> 00:12:50.078
if you and I are fighting and I'm remembering and you're learning,

334
00:12:50.140 --> 00:12:50.672
I'm going to win.

335
00:12:50.673 --> 00:12:52.953
Because remembering is faster than learning.

336
00:12:53.625 --> 00:12:53.984
And he's like,

337
00:12:54.000 --> 00:12:54.156
really?

338
00:12:54.157 --> 00:12:54.437
I'm like,

339
00:12:54.453 --> 00:12:54.578
no,

340
00:12:54.640 --> 00:12:55.203
it's a metaphor.

341
00:12:55.281 --> 00:12:55.422
Like,

342
00:12:55.437 --> 00:12:56.172
you're still going to learn.

343
00:12:57.422 --> 00:12:58.594
You recognize this guy's name.

344
00:12:58.640 --> 00:12:58.781
Like,

345
00:12:58.859 --> 00:12:59.812
I don't have a chance,

346
00:12:59.875 --> 00:13:00.078
right?

347
00:13:00.094 --> 00:13:00.703
I bite him.

348
00:13:02.323 --> 00:13:02.663
But for me,

349
00:13:02.703 --> 00:13:04.684
that high ground is where you want to get to.

350
00:13:04.745 --> 00:13:06.727
It's where you have positional advantage,

351
00:13:06.766 --> 00:13:07.708
where you have perspective,

352
00:13:07.766 --> 00:13:08.028
right?

353
00:13:08.048 --> 00:13:09.712
So our offices are called the high ground.

354
00:13:10.251 --> 00:13:13.891
Our office is like co-working facilities for veteran and athlete-led companies.

355
00:13:13.892 --> 00:13:15.055
It's like a warrior we work.

356
00:13:15.774 --> 00:13:16.680
What I try to do is look,

357
00:13:16.977 --> 00:13:17.102
hey,

358
00:13:17.103 --> 00:13:17.274
man,

359
00:13:18.571 --> 00:13:21.462
the only thing that's different on these maps is really the hard skills,

360
00:13:21.540 --> 00:13:23.227
between the ball field and the battlefield and the boardroom.

361
00:13:23.446 --> 00:13:25.727
The soft skills and experiences are very similar.

362
00:13:26.441 --> 00:13:38.569
and i always tell these young veterans to go hey man you know what the difference between a 15 000 foot peak in north america and south america is and they're going to be yes right because that's kind of where we are like there's an answer where you get them like nothing man it's 15 thousand 15 15 000.

363
00:13:38.570 --> 00:13:53.671
two-thirds of what it takes to get there is the same regardless what map you're gonna be on like so if you've been on the high ground on the battlefield you you have a percentage of what it takes to be on the high ground of the boardroom yeah and what we try to do in our business is we try to co-mingle those

364
00:13:53.734 --> 00:13:55.905
men and women who are leading at really high levels in in the boardroom.

365
00:13:56.297 --> 00:14:15.490
with men and women who are leaving the ball from the battlefield and serendipity is part of the strategy but what happens is like for me it's it's the it's the empathy engine like you put someone in a shoot house and you know the ceo of a fortune 100 company is intimidating if you're a 24 year old you know second ranger kid you know until

366
00:14:15.491 --> 00:14:24.443
you're in the shoot house and all of a sudden that ceo's like hey man what i do and that second race is like no i got you and all of a sudden this equilibrium sets in and you start is like oh that's just a dude

367
00:14:24.981 --> 00:14:39.928
doing the best he can where he is where he has and what a lot of these young veterans know is like senior executive leaders they have all the questions we do i can't tell you how many times i've been in a conversation with a guy who's more money he knows what to do with he's accomplished everything on the board even possibly can it's

368
00:14:39.967 --> 00:14:40.272
like man

369
00:14:40.916 --> 00:14:43.359
I wonder how I do on the battlefield.

370
00:14:43.399 --> 00:14:44.580
And so we all got questions.

371
00:14:44.719 --> 00:14:44.941
Sure.

372
00:14:45.180 --> 00:14:47.223
And the question is who you live in life with,

373
00:14:47.242 --> 00:14:48.625
or you ask yourself these questions.

374
00:14:49.086 --> 00:14:49.445
Yeah.

375
00:14:49.446 --> 00:14:50.024
Are you asking,

376
00:14:50.047 --> 00:14:53.547
are you running with people who can help you answer the questions or are they just versions?

377
00:14:53.625 --> 00:14:53.828
Right.

378
00:14:53.829 --> 00:14:54.188
You're right.

379
00:14:54.211 --> 00:14:55.711
So when I see the high ground,

380
00:14:55.727 --> 00:14:55.867
it's,

381
00:14:55.992 --> 00:14:56.133
it's,

382
00:14:56.492 --> 00:14:56.789
it's a,

383
00:14:57.539 --> 00:15:01.992
it's a metaphorical application of what we know to be true about being on the battlefield.

384
00:15:02.024 --> 00:15:02.805
Does that make sense?

385
00:15:02.820 --> 00:15:03.539
A hundred percent.

386
00:15:03.540 --> 00:15:03.899
It's also,

387
00:15:03.945 --> 00:15:04.180
I mean,

388
00:15:04.258 --> 00:15:05.695
taking even another level,

389
00:15:05.758 --> 00:15:07.477
it's like being the high ground of your mind.

390
00:15:07.600 --> 00:15:08.961
and not being so attached to your feet.

391
00:15:08.962 --> 00:15:09.081
I mean,

392
00:15:09.082 --> 00:15:09.362
that's all.

393
00:15:09.542 --> 00:15:09.783
I mean,

394
00:15:09.784 --> 00:15:10.142
that's really,

395
00:15:10.162 --> 00:15:10.943
it all begins there.

396
00:15:10.984 --> 00:15:11.304
Exactly.

397
00:15:11.305 --> 00:15:12.005
It all begins there.

398
00:15:12.103 --> 00:15:12.263
Right,

399
00:15:12.287 --> 00:15:12.845
exactly.

400
00:15:12.927 --> 00:15:13.927
On the inside.

401
00:15:15.267 --> 00:15:15.849
Objective.

402
00:15:15.966 --> 00:15:16.130
Yeah,

403
00:15:16.169 --> 00:15:16.412
I mean,

404
00:15:16.413 --> 00:15:19.208
the neck up is really the women's system.

405
00:15:19.693 --> 00:15:20.412
I've always told my,

406
00:15:20.529 --> 00:15:21.497
this isn't scientific,

407
00:15:21.771 --> 00:15:25.904
which will shock you and everybody who knows me watching this.

408
00:15:26.982 --> 00:15:27.091
But

409
00:15:27.497 --> 00:15:28.372
I've always told my daughters,

410
00:15:28.373 --> 00:15:28.622
I'm like,

411
00:15:28.716 --> 00:15:28.841
hey,

412
00:15:28.842 --> 00:15:31.107
the human machine has four performance systems.

413
00:15:31.482 --> 00:15:32.044
You have the body,

414
00:15:32.091 --> 00:15:32.357
the brain,

415
00:15:32.419 --> 00:15:32.919
the mind,

416
00:15:32.920 --> 00:15:33.497
and the soul.

417
00:15:35.013 --> 00:15:35.872
And for an analogy's sake,

418
00:15:35.873 --> 00:15:36.888
I say the body is a car.

419
00:15:37.476 --> 00:15:38.457
The brain is a steering wheel,

420
00:15:38.458 --> 00:15:39.378
the mind is a driver,

421
00:15:39.558 --> 00:15:41.499
and the soul is an inherent sense of where you want to be,

422
00:15:41.640 --> 00:15:41.859
right?

423
00:15:42.339 --> 00:15:43.781
But the body of the journey is just machines,

424
00:15:44.421 --> 00:15:46.046
and they have machine-like principles.

425
00:15:46.546 --> 00:15:48.070
And when you begin to understand that,

426
00:15:48.163 --> 00:15:49.890
you're not as harsh on yourself.

427
00:15:50.070 --> 00:15:50.226
Like,

428
00:15:50.773 --> 00:15:55.476
I'm not mad at myself when my tire got a flat or when my brakes fail.

429
00:15:55.477 --> 00:15:55.632
I mean,

430
00:15:55.633 --> 00:15:57.773
it's a byproduct of being a consumable,

431
00:15:57.851 --> 00:15:58.179
right?

432
00:15:58.945 --> 00:16:00.273
And so the body is a consumable.

433
00:16:01.163 --> 00:16:03.007
And that's why I love,

434
00:16:03.413 --> 00:16:03.617
John,

435
00:16:03.648 --> 00:16:04.742
what you've been doing for years,

436
00:16:04.743 --> 00:16:06.492
is I've watched you kind of launch this concept.

437
00:16:06.523 --> 00:16:06.648
is

438
00:16:07.532 --> 00:16:11.437
And what Chris is doing with operator syndrome and all this other stuff,

439
00:16:11.438 --> 00:16:11.598
I go,

440
00:16:12.578 --> 00:16:17.559
you can drive with four mismatched tires and steering is off.

441
00:16:17.621 --> 00:16:18.199
You can do it.

442
00:16:19.019 --> 00:16:20.207
You can get to your destination.

443
00:16:20.785 --> 00:16:21.605
It's going to be exhaust.

444
00:16:21.668 --> 00:16:22.426
Most efficiently.

445
00:16:22.644 --> 00:16:23.644
It'll be 180%

446
00:16:24.129 --> 00:16:26.113
burden because you're trying to do this all the time.

447
00:16:26.144 --> 00:16:26.316
Right,

448
00:16:26.457 --> 00:16:26.629
right.

449
00:16:27.004 --> 00:16:33.723
And what mindfulness allows you to do is step back and figure out what's going on with the wheels and the car and the steering.

450
00:16:33.724 --> 00:16:33.863
Yeah.

451
00:16:34.804 --> 00:16:34.925
And,

452
00:16:34.985 --> 00:16:35.205
you know,

453
00:16:35.206 --> 00:16:38.509
the mind can impose its will on the body and the brain for a little while,

454
00:16:38.510 --> 00:16:39.490
but it's unsustainable.

455
00:16:40.431 --> 00:16:41.752
So the trick is work all three.

456
00:16:42.271 --> 00:16:43.052
Exactly.

457
00:16:43.053 --> 00:16:43.810
Right.

458
00:16:43.896 --> 00:16:48.756
And so defining that and understanding,

459
00:16:49.662 --> 00:16:49.896
you know,

460
00:16:50.435 --> 00:16:55.701
what the high ground is and sensitizing that to really what your world is.

461
00:16:55.748 --> 00:16:59.029
Like if I had all the money in the world and didn't have a relationship with my daughters,

462
00:16:59.935 --> 00:17:00.732
it would be worthless,

463
00:17:00.795 --> 00:17:01.076
right?

464
00:17:01.077 --> 00:17:01.826
Right.

465
00:17:01.827 --> 00:17:01.951
And,

466
00:17:02.248 --> 00:17:02.498
you know,

467
00:17:02.499 --> 00:17:02.888
I say this.

468
00:17:03.304 --> 00:17:03.424
Well,

469
00:17:03.425 --> 00:17:04.345
you're not even in the high ground.

470
00:17:04.465 --> 00:17:04.584
No.

471
00:17:05.405 --> 00:17:07.065
You're not seeing the big picture.

472
00:17:07.165 --> 00:17:08.563
100%.

473
00:17:08.626 --> 00:17:10.427
And I say this to a lot of people.

474
00:17:10.466 --> 00:17:11.806
I say currency isn't money.

475
00:17:12.626 --> 00:17:15.524
Currency is the value proposition upon which you make decisions.

476
00:17:16.626 --> 00:17:16.743
So,

477
00:17:17.063 --> 00:17:17.266
John,

478
00:17:17.306 --> 00:17:19.985
I've been in places in the world where the dollar has no significance.

479
00:17:20.485 --> 00:17:22.126
But a carton of cigarettes is gold.

480
00:17:23.329 --> 00:17:27.204
And gold only matters in places where beauty is appreciated.

481
00:17:27.454 --> 00:17:27.563
So,

482
00:17:27.626 --> 00:17:28.391
what's the currency?

483
00:17:28.392 --> 00:17:29.454
And we all have this currency.

484
00:17:30.312 --> 00:17:33.075
And you need to do some deep dive and understand what your currency is.

485
00:17:33.335 --> 00:17:38.696
And I think that's the way I see it is the most lonely and lost I've ever felt.

486
00:17:39.243 --> 00:17:39.743
Ever felt,

487
00:17:39.821 --> 00:17:40.439
bar none,

488
00:17:41.220 --> 00:17:45.103
is really the first three to five years when I left the ball field and battlefield and I came to the boardroom.

489
00:17:46.321 --> 00:17:46.462
Well,

490
00:17:46.463 --> 00:17:47.149
that's identity.

491
00:17:47.774 --> 00:17:47.962
Well,

492
00:17:48.024 --> 00:17:48.274
I mean,

493
00:17:48.853 --> 00:17:49.728
there's simplicity,

494
00:17:49.868 --> 00:17:50.165
right?

495
00:17:50.368 --> 00:17:50.899
Right.

496
00:17:51.165 --> 00:17:51.774
It's simple,

497
00:17:51.806 --> 00:17:52.571
but it's not easy,

498
00:17:52.728 --> 00:17:52.993
right?

499
00:17:53.540 --> 00:17:56.118
But there's no mystery where the high ground is on the ball field and the battlefield.

500
00:17:56.372 --> 00:18:19.929
on the battlefield like you you know where it is like yeah like hey i want to play in the super wall like it's it's and not only that is their total clarity on what the x on the map is but there's an infrastructure infrastructure in an ecosystem that's designed to get you as high and as far as you're willing and able to go on the ball from the battlefield in the boardroom but you have to assemble that you have to build that right and the x on the map man

501
00:18:20.054 --> 00:18:22.241
profit is not purpose

502
00:18:23.716 --> 00:18:24.017
It is,

503
00:18:24.257 --> 00:18:26.058
and you can spend it however much you want to.

504
00:18:26.119 --> 00:18:27.179
Profit in and of itself.

505
00:18:27.201 --> 00:18:28.001
That's like bullets.

506
00:18:28.123 --> 00:18:29.322
Bullets have no purpose.

507
00:18:29.341 --> 00:18:31.162
They're of no value unless they're used,

508
00:18:31.263 --> 00:18:31.521
right?

509
00:18:32.248 --> 00:18:32.787
But I tell them,

510
00:18:32.788 --> 00:18:32.966
I say,

511
00:18:33.029 --> 00:18:39.388
don't be apologetic about being successful because your profit funds and facilitates and resources your purpose,

512
00:18:39.537 --> 00:18:39.818
right?

513
00:18:39.819 --> 00:18:40.458
Yeah.

514
00:18:40.552 --> 00:18:42.693
And I've worked with executives that they're like,

515
00:18:42.694 --> 00:18:42.818
hey,

516
00:18:42.819 --> 00:18:42.990
man,

517
00:18:43.708 --> 00:18:45.052
I can't make another million dollars.

518
00:18:45.053 --> 00:18:45.365
I'm like,

519
00:18:45.630 --> 00:18:46.318
sucks to be you.

520
00:18:46.599 --> 00:18:47.646
I got my first one,

521
00:18:47.677 --> 00:18:47.927
right?

522
00:18:47.928 --> 00:18:48.318
Yeah.

523
00:18:48.365 --> 00:18:49.146
But the point of it is,

524
00:18:49.162 --> 00:18:52.849
is like a million dollars is always going to fail you if it's just sitting in the bank like Scrooge McDuck.

525
00:18:53.472 --> 00:18:53.753
You know,

526
00:18:54.333 --> 00:18:56.596
like if we've got an army full of every weapon in every round,

527
00:18:56.597 --> 00:18:57.655
but we don't go outside the wire,

528
00:18:57.656 --> 00:18:58.057
we fail.

529
00:18:59.076 --> 00:19:03.162
So you don't need to be apologetic about being profitable because for me,

530
00:19:03.280 --> 00:19:04.139
money is bullets.

531
00:19:04.381 --> 00:19:04.842
More bullets,

532
00:19:04.905 --> 00:19:05.405
better targets,

533
00:19:05.467 --> 00:19:06.022
bigger targets.

534
00:19:06.023 --> 00:19:06.623
That's all it is.

535
00:19:06.624 --> 00:19:07.108
Exactly.

536
00:19:07.109 --> 00:19:07.865
And more you can fire.

537
00:19:07.928 --> 00:19:09.670
But it took me a long time to,

538
00:19:10.030 --> 00:19:10.686
and you can miss,

539
00:19:10.733 --> 00:19:12.530
you've got margin when you've got a lot of rounds,

540
00:19:12.592 --> 00:19:12.858
right?

541
00:19:14.780 --> 00:19:15.186
But for me,

542
00:19:15.467 --> 00:19:15.733
you know,

543
00:19:18.420 --> 00:19:18.983
I would tell you,

544
00:19:19.373 --> 00:19:22.545
I don't know that I'd ever not known what I wanted to be when I grew up.

545
00:19:22.908 --> 00:19:23.809
until I was in my early

546
00:19:24.190 --> 00:19:24.911
30s. Yeah.

547
00:19:25.532 --> 00:19:34.569
And the problem with that recalibration that's kind of thrust upon us when we leave the ball for it on the battlefield is everybody goes to those moments of reinvention.

548
00:19:35.086 --> 00:19:36.147
You've got to reinvent yourself.

549
00:19:37.188 --> 00:19:37.729
You're not the biggest,

550
00:19:37.749 --> 00:19:38.469
fastest,

551
00:19:38.610 --> 00:19:38.911
smartest,

552
00:19:38.930 --> 00:19:39.372
strongest.

553
00:19:39.373 --> 00:19:40.411
You're not all these other things,

554
00:19:40.469 --> 00:19:40.712
right?

555
00:19:40.731 --> 00:19:42.493
Like you stopped growing in high school.

556
00:19:42.555 --> 00:19:43.618
You're not going to play in the NBA.

557
00:19:44.735 --> 00:19:48.782
And when you have to go through that really hard moment of forced recalibration,

558
00:19:49.384 --> 00:19:50.165
you've got infrastructure.

559
00:19:50.166 --> 00:19:51.587
You've got margin to do it.

560
00:19:52.790 --> 00:19:55.540
And sometimes when you're leaving the NFL or you're leaving the SEAL teams,

561
00:19:55.680 --> 00:19:57.102
you just have less margin.

562
00:19:57.884 --> 00:20:01.493
So it's not that it's any less hard when you have to do it when you're 18,

563
00:20:02.509 --> 00:20:03.149
emotionally,

564
00:20:03.259 --> 00:20:04.321
but materially it's hard.

565
00:20:04.446 --> 00:20:05.447
because you don't have the margin.

566
00:20:05.448 --> 00:20:06.048
Right,

567
00:20:06.327 --> 00:20:06.609
yeah.

568
00:20:06.610 --> 00:20:07.609
I remember when I was at the Ravens,

569
00:20:07.610 --> 00:20:09.132
there was a dude who was the,

570
00:20:09.351 --> 00:20:11.773
he's always been the fastest guy wherever he's been,

571
00:20:11.812 --> 00:20:12.034
right?

572
00:20:12.433 --> 00:20:15.620
And that camp was the first time he wasn't the fastest guy and it broke him.

573
00:20:16.839 --> 00:20:17.800
And some of the coaches were.

574
00:20:17.801 --> 00:20:17.902
Well,

575
00:20:17.903 --> 00:20:18.199
I mean,

576
00:20:18.277 --> 00:20:19.620
his identity is like stuck to it.

577
00:20:19.683 --> 00:20:19.839
Well,

578
00:20:19.902 --> 00:20:20.683
that's why I told someone,

579
00:20:20.684 --> 00:20:22.542
some of the coaches were kind of messed with him when I was like,

580
00:20:22.558 --> 00:20:22.886
hey man,

581
00:20:23.745 --> 00:20:24.839
that's not a character issue,

582
00:20:24.840 --> 00:20:26.011
that's an exposure issue.

583
00:20:26.261 --> 00:20:28.370
Like when was the first time you realize you weren't the fastest.

584
00:20:28.824 --> 00:20:29.027
Right.

585
00:20:29.150 --> 00:20:31.712
First time I realized I wasn't as fast as fifth grade Little Rock,

586
00:20:31.753 --> 00:20:32.233
Arkansas.

587
00:20:32.454 --> 00:20:33.555
Come around second base.

588
00:20:33.673 --> 00:20:34.895
Some girl running.

589
00:20:34.896 --> 00:20:36.399
I don't know if you're not old enough to remember this,

590
00:20:36.419 --> 00:20:36.919
but they made,

591
00:20:37.157 --> 00:20:37.376
you know,

592
00:20:37.377 --> 00:20:40.001
you had this brief season in life when we had parachute pants.

593
00:20:40.002 --> 00:20:41.462
And then they made fake parachute pants.

594
00:20:42.040 --> 00:20:42.165
Oh,

595
00:20:42.219 --> 00:20:43.360
that's pretty quick.

596
00:20:43.868 --> 00:20:43.985
Yeah,

597
00:20:43.986 --> 00:20:47.110
what I learned about the fake parachute pants is those are not flame retardant.

598
00:20:48.094 --> 00:20:51.344
My chubby little legs are catching on fire as I'm rounding second.

599
00:20:52.969 --> 00:20:53.610
But then I find,

600
00:20:53.611 --> 00:20:53.860
you know,

601
00:20:53.891 --> 00:20:55.173
when I find I'm not the fastest,

602
00:20:55.219 --> 00:20:56.673
I go home to a mom and a dad.

603
00:20:57.032 --> 00:20:57.844
So I margin.

604
00:20:58.310 --> 00:20:58.611
And I said,

605
00:20:58.631 --> 00:21:05.417
this kid has always been the fastest and his speed is what's going to allow him to extract his family from poverty.

606
00:21:05.898 --> 00:21:07.300
And now he's just finally went the fastest.

607
00:21:07.301 --> 00:21:08.863
So you got to give him time.

608
00:21:09.081 --> 00:21:09.980
I mean,

609
00:21:10.003 --> 00:21:10.745
that's amygdala,

610
00:21:10.839 --> 00:21:11.644
that's limbic system.

611
00:21:12.464 --> 00:21:14.925
The brain lacks the stimulus to grow based on success.

612
00:21:14.972 --> 00:21:16.581
It only grows because of comfort.

613
00:21:16.628 --> 00:21:16.863
I mean,

614
00:21:16.909 --> 00:21:17.472
discomfort,

615
00:21:17.534 --> 00:21:17.972
adversity.

616
00:21:18.675 --> 00:21:22.081
And so that evolution,

617
00:21:23.675 --> 00:21:24.050
it has to.

618
00:21:24.051 --> 00:21:25.956
And I think what's hard for us is.

619
00:21:26.798 --> 00:21:27.859
We're having to do that later.

620
00:21:28.540 --> 00:21:35.885
And we're having to do it having been on a high ground that offers a unique clarity of purpose.

621
00:21:36.908 --> 00:21:38.549
And I'm also a horizon guy.

622
00:21:38.627 --> 00:21:38.971
And John,

623
00:21:39.213 --> 00:21:44.752
I'd be interested in kind of how I articulate this and see your opinions on it because I don't know if I do it well.

624
00:21:46.221 --> 00:21:47.424
I would say until my early

625
00:21:48.033 --> 00:21:49.986
30s, I was flying nap at the Earth.

626
00:21:50.736 --> 00:21:52.627
So nap at the Earth is your contour flying.

627
00:21:52.628 --> 00:21:55.814
It's like every cool scene in a movie where the birds just

628
00:21:56.326 --> 00:21:57.547
going right along the treetops,

629
00:21:57.627 --> 00:21:57.788
right?

630
00:21:57.808 --> 00:21:58.609
That's called Napa.

631
00:21:58.628 --> 00:21:59.449
This is what that's called.

632
00:22:00.269 --> 00:22:02.531
And that provides a really fast feedback loop.

633
00:22:03.113 --> 00:22:04.453
I do return on effort,

634
00:22:04.476 --> 00:22:05.039
return on effort,

635
00:22:05.040 --> 00:22:05.679
return on effort,

636
00:22:05.680 --> 00:22:05.953
right?

637
00:22:06.578 --> 00:22:07.999
And also in the boardroom,

638
00:22:08.195 --> 00:22:14.789
I'd never been in an environment that I had to wait more than a month to figure out if what I did worked.

639
00:22:14.820 --> 00:22:16.179
Like on the ball field,

640
00:22:16.429 --> 00:22:17.242
every seven seconds.

641
00:22:18.460 --> 00:22:18.601
Yeah,

642
00:22:18.602 --> 00:22:19.023
exactly.

643
00:22:19.101 --> 00:22:19.554
Instant feedback.

644
00:22:19.555 --> 00:22:25.242
And I can self-assess my value proposition with my teammates and also so I know who I am and where where I am and what I'm doing.

645
00:22:25.243 --> 00:22:25.476
And then,

646
00:22:25.890 --> 00:22:28.732
Then I go to the sidelines and my position coach gives me feedback.

647
00:22:28.773 --> 00:22:31.135
Then I go to halftime and the coordinator gives me feedback.

648
00:22:31.154 --> 00:22:32.037
And at the end of the game,

649
00:22:32.455 --> 00:22:32.978
the outcome,

650
00:22:33.037 --> 00:22:34.658
the coaches and the fans give me feedback,

651
00:22:34.760 --> 00:22:35.041
right?

652
00:22:35.502 --> 00:22:36.018
In our world,

653
00:22:36.019 --> 00:22:37.244
you get feedback really quickly.

654
00:22:37.822 --> 00:22:38.299
Ten go out,

655
00:22:38.346 --> 00:22:38.963
ten come back.

656
00:22:39.221 --> 00:22:39.463
I mean,

657
00:22:40.127 --> 00:22:42.283
there's not a far horizon on effort,

658
00:22:42.346 --> 00:22:42.611
right?

659
00:22:42.643 --> 00:22:43.174
But all of a sudden,

660
00:22:43.175 --> 00:22:48.752
I went to the boardroom and there's a scene I kind of point to,

661
00:22:48.814 --> 00:22:50.393
you know,

662
00:22:50.486 --> 00:22:51.377
in Finding Nemo.

663
00:22:53.182 --> 00:23:10.231
this is my level of maturity is it i love it i want to squeeze this amazing movie that's over like hey those inside out moves are stunningly accurate they're so good there's a scene in finding nemo where he flies he swims off the core reef and

664
00:23:10.232 --> 00:23:16.185
it's the first time nemo didn't know where he was because he's always had the reef the you know or marvin the dad

665
00:23:17.830 --> 00:23:33.871
and until i was in my early 30s i was never in a scenario where i didn't have fast feedback and i and and and i'm surrounded by people who know as much or more about the map that i'm on that i do and all of a sudden it's like you fly into a fog bank and

666
00:23:33.886 --> 00:23:39.511
i had no instrument panel to to yeah to understand where i was you're looking for a new map

667
00:23:40.062 --> 00:24:06.533
you know what i mean it's like i mean and so you got to build it right and what i think's so great about this podcast and these other efforts is we we've had enough friends that have gotten out and survived their own mistakes that now you're going to get in the gouge a little bit oh sure and you still got to go through it like i can tell you everything that's going to happen in hell week and with no surprises it's still going to suck yeah and you spill not and you still might have and you can make an argument that's worse because you know what's coming yeah yeah and so

668
00:24:07.034 --> 00:24:07.314
You know,

669
00:24:07.454 --> 00:24:08.595
there's no real hack,

670
00:24:08.694 --> 00:24:10.814
but familiarity is always helpful,

671
00:24:10.815 --> 00:24:10.953
right?

672
00:24:10.954 --> 00:24:11.273
Right.

673
00:24:11.453 --> 00:24:11.574
So,

674
00:24:12.074 --> 00:24:12.297
you know,

675
00:24:12.298 --> 00:24:12.934
when guys get out,

676
00:24:12.935 --> 00:24:13.297
I always tell them,

677
00:24:13.298 --> 00:24:13.496
I was like,

678
00:24:13.497 --> 00:24:13.594
hey,

679
00:24:13.595 --> 00:24:13.734
man,

680
00:24:13.735 --> 00:24:17.195
the best way to look at your first three to five years after you get out is like an IA.

681
00:24:17.258 --> 00:24:18.258
It's like a TDY.

682
00:24:19.500 --> 00:24:19.734
You know,

683
00:24:20.234 --> 00:24:21.656
you're chopping to another command.

684
00:24:22.156 --> 00:24:23.055
You're trying to figure out,

685
00:24:23.336 --> 00:24:25.602
but hold it loosely because they rightly hold you loosely,

686
00:24:25.695 --> 00:24:27.039
right?

687
00:24:27.961 --> 00:24:28.258
But yeah,

688
00:24:28.336 --> 00:24:28.477
man,

689
00:24:28.492 --> 00:24:32.180
that first three to five years was hard and

690
00:24:32.664 --> 00:24:33.836
I probably made it harder.

691
00:24:34.952 --> 00:24:37.975
by not wanting to ask for help or not.

692
00:24:38.836 --> 00:24:40.016
My dad died when I was young,

693
00:24:40.937 --> 00:24:43.223
and my job is to protect and provide ever since then.

694
00:24:44.301 --> 00:24:46.801
You're not used to asking for help,

695
00:24:48.746 --> 00:24:50.926
and those mentors aren't so overtly.

696
00:24:51.910 --> 00:24:52.832
When you check in a platoon,

697
00:24:53.004 --> 00:24:54.535
you've got a senior enlisted,

698
00:24:54.566 --> 00:24:57.941
and there's just no reason to pretend like you know what they are.

699
00:24:58.129 --> 00:24:59.973
They're just so obviously.

700
00:25:00.692 --> 00:25:16.826
so much more capable you and more experienced and in our world like you're staying for not asking questions people say hey do do the special operations community have a permissive environment when it comes to curiosity like we have an expectant yeah like if if i brief you on something and you're not asking questions and

701
00:25:16.827 --> 00:25:28.686
you're a new guy i'm coming for you after the brief i'm like oh you don't have any questions you've never done this for but you're the best in the world like you have no questions right beginner's mindset because if we're not asking questions you're telling me one to two things you don't care or you're already great at it

702
00:25:29.268 --> 00:25:56.637
right those are the only two realities if you're not asking me questions you don't care or you're already perfect you know i'll throw in those i'll throw in the you're insecure yeah that's the reason yeah right you know when i have this keynote i give called pursuing elite and what i say is like hey man these are my observations on the ball field and battlefield in the boardroom yeah about people that just consistently produce elite outcomes right and yeah we're going to ask you about that yeah yeah i know you have your four pillars which i which are really

703
00:25:56.976 --> 00:25:57.116
Yeah,

704
00:25:57.156 --> 00:26:00.117
the four maps and then purposeful,

705
00:26:00.118 --> 00:26:00.438
passionate,

706
00:26:00.439 --> 00:26:00.756
protective,

707
00:26:00.757 --> 00:26:01.059
and modern.

708
00:26:01.719 --> 00:26:03.738
And yeah,

709
00:26:04.637 --> 00:26:05.195
and so for me,

710
00:26:05.297 --> 00:26:08.039
it's curiosity is what you said.

711
00:26:10.695 --> 00:26:11.961
I esteem curiosity greatly.

712
00:26:11.962 --> 00:26:13.399
Curiosity keeps you in the high ground too.

713
00:26:13.445 --> 00:26:14.039
You know what I mean?

714
00:26:14.040 --> 00:26:14.664
Because you're like,

715
00:26:14.680 --> 00:26:15.367
you're looking,

716
00:26:15.383 --> 00:26:15.742
you're nervous.

717
00:26:15.743 --> 00:26:17.024
Curiosity is a declaration.

718
00:26:17.025 --> 00:26:18.180
When I talk about pursuing elite,

719
00:26:18.181 --> 00:26:21.117
what I say is the difference between being excellent and elite is are you done or you're not done yet.

720
00:26:22.117 --> 00:26:22.945
Excellence is real.

721
00:26:23.024 --> 00:26:24.664
Excellence is quantifiable.

722
00:26:24.665 --> 00:26:25.164
I mean like.

723
00:26:25.320 --> 00:26:25.477
Right.

724
00:26:25.792 --> 00:26:26.553
People ask me all the time,

725
00:26:26.573 --> 00:26:28.095
what's the difference between being excellent and being elite?

726
00:26:28.096 --> 00:26:28.634
Is it talent?

727
00:26:28.635 --> 00:26:28.855
I'm like,

728
00:26:28.876 --> 00:26:28.995
no.

729
00:26:30.396 --> 00:26:33.884
There's nothing more abundant than unrealized potential and unfulfilled talent.

730
00:26:34.564 --> 00:26:36.220
And I'm not marginalizing talent.

731
00:26:36.306 --> 00:26:36.962
Talent's real.

732
00:26:37.306 --> 00:26:38.564
There's no reason to not talk about it.

733
00:26:38.565 --> 00:26:39.485
And talent will get you there,

734
00:26:39.486 --> 00:26:40.407
but it won't keep you there.

735
00:26:41.025 --> 00:26:42.884
Bud's is built to be a talent breaker,

736
00:26:43.353 --> 00:26:43.603
right?

737
00:26:44.056 --> 00:26:49.181
And a lot of times the guys that don't make it through are the guys that are so supremely talented that they've never been tested before.

738
00:26:50.150 --> 00:26:51.837
Like my advantage is,

739
00:26:51.838 --> 00:26:52.025
oh yeah,

740
00:26:52.118 --> 00:26:53.900
like my gift is not being gifted.

741
00:26:54.900 --> 00:26:57.101
because I've never walked in thinking it wasn't going to be hard.

742
00:26:57.140 --> 00:26:57.762
I remember when our,

743
00:26:58.021 --> 00:26:59.781
our buds plaque says too dumb to quit.

744
00:26:59.782 --> 00:26:59.883
Oh,

745
00:26:59.884 --> 00:27:00.820
a hundred percent.

746
00:27:01.000 --> 00:27:01.203
Yeah.

747
00:27:01.223 --> 00:27:02.480
That was like the church is like,

748
00:27:02.519 --> 00:27:02.660
sir,

749
00:27:02.661 --> 00:27:03.301
if you're going to be,

750
00:27:03.441 --> 00:27:04.183
you're going to be done,

751
00:27:04.199 --> 00:27:04.621
be tough.

752
00:27:04.622 --> 00:27:04.941
I'm like,

753
00:27:05.019 --> 00:27:05.480
I'm your man.

754
00:27:06.723 --> 00:27:07.465
2.08,

755
00:27:07.519 --> 00:27:08.582
five at the nail with Kevin,

756
00:27:08.644 --> 00:27:08.824
man,

757
00:27:08.902 --> 00:27:09.426
I'm your guy.

758
00:27:09.566 --> 00:27:09.824
Right.

759
00:27:10.410 --> 00:27:10.582
And,

760
00:27:10.629 --> 00:27:10.769
uh,

761
00:27:11.051 --> 00:27:11.207
but,

762
00:27:11.363 --> 00:27:12.707
but it's always been hard.

763
00:27:12.738 --> 00:27:13.504
So when it's hard,

764
00:27:13.505 --> 00:27:14.207
I'm not shocked.

765
00:27:14.269 --> 00:27:14.566
Right.

766
00:27:14.567 --> 00:27:14.988
And,

767
00:27:15.348 --> 00:27:15.660
and again,

768
00:27:15.661 --> 00:27:16.566
it's not a character issue.

769
00:27:16.644 --> 00:27:19.129
Like when you talk to guys who quit during hell week,

770
00:27:19.144 --> 00:27:20.441
it's really kind of fascinating.

771
00:27:21.566 --> 00:27:23.785
and the guys that are extraordinarily talented.

772
00:27:24.168 --> 00:27:40.752
physically gifted when they quit and they talk about it they almost talk about it like it's an out-of-body experience like they're in the third person watching themselves quit and they're not able to stop it well that's the same thing i felt around in second base as a chubby fifth grader right it's like you

773
00:27:40.799 --> 00:27:52.767
go into this fight or flight it's like the inverse of flow you're in this third party state powerless to stop because the because the monkey brain's taking over like you're not driving anymore monkey brain thinks you're gonna die it's running the ship now right Hmm.

774
00:27:53.236 --> 00:27:54.678
And so,

775
00:27:55.338 --> 00:27:55.578
you know,

776
00:27:55.818 --> 00:27:57.779
that's why we let a lot of listed guys come back through.

777
00:27:57.959 --> 00:27:58.181
You know,

778
00:27:58.182 --> 00:28:00.424
if you're talented and it's the first hardest thing,

779
00:28:00.425 --> 00:28:02.865
we're going to find a way to keep you back in the community.

780
00:28:02.904 --> 00:28:03.185
You know,

781
00:28:03.389 --> 00:28:04.185
I jokingly call,

782
00:28:04.248 --> 00:28:04.709
I call my,

783
00:28:04.710 --> 00:28:06.928
it's a little bit of an origin story in some ways.

784
00:28:07.232 --> 00:28:08.810
I call myself the achieving average.

785
00:28:09.498 --> 00:28:09.685
Yeah.

786
00:28:10.045 --> 00:28:10.170
Well,

787
00:28:10.171 --> 00:28:11.326
that's part of the flow.

788
00:28:11.373 --> 00:28:12.435
You say it's like average.

789
00:28:12.592 --> 00:28:13.310
It's like good,

790
00:28:13.389 --> 00:28:13.670
bad,

791
00:28:13.795 --> 00:28:15.451
average.

792
00:28:15.685 --> 00:28:16.045
Yeah.

793
00:28:16.046 --> 00:28:17.857
So the outcome is your bad,

794
00:28:17.920 --> 00:28:18.139
average,

795
00:28:18.154 --> 00:28:18.295
good,

796
00:28:18.357 --> 00:28:19.076
excellent lead.

797
00:28:19.077 --> 00:28:19.248
Right.

798
00:28:19.264 --> 00:28:19.685
Exactly.

799
00:28:20.029 --> 00:28:22.560
And so the difference between being excellent is either you're done or not done yet.

800
00:28:22.648 --> 00:28:23.968
because excellence is real.

801
00:28:24.408 --> 00:28:25.308
It's quantifiable.

802
00:28:25.829 --> 00:28:26.169
And for me,

803
00:28:26.269 --> 00:28:28.351
the lead is what happens once you get to the X.

804
00:28:29.011 --> 00:28:32.347
And there's people who get to the X and they hug and they high-five and they celebrate and they're done.

805
00:28:32.348 --> 00:28:33.870
So the X is,

806
00:28:34.269 --> 00:28:35.730
in our vernacular,

807
00:28:35.808 --> 00:28:36.808
the X is the target.

808
00:28:36.909 --> 00:28:37.034
Right,

809
00:28:37.214 --> 00:28:37.331
yeah.

810
00:28:37.332 --> 00:28:37.714
The goal.

811
00:28:38.409 --> 00:28:39.909
That means you're done.

812
00:28:39.956 --> 00:28:40.097
Yeah,

813
00:28:40.098 --> 00:28:40.409
you're done.

814
00:28:40.410 --> 00:28:42.394
Hitting a threshold when you started your first company.

815
00:28:42.566 --> 00:28:43.034
In theory,

816
00:28:43.097 --> 00:28:43.566
you're done.

817
00:28:44.237 --> 00:28:46.706
And what I say is the people who are leaders,

818
00:28:46.737 --> 00:28:47.519
people get there.

819
00:28:48.519 --> 00:28:50.347
And if anything,

820
00:28:50.550 --> 00:28:50.909
you've got to.

821
00:28:51.616 --> 00:28:52.777
Encourage them to rest,

822
00:28:52.818 --> 00:28:53.238
recover,

823
00:28:53.497 --> 00:28:53.878
and revel,

824
00:28:54.038 --> 00:28:54.298
right?

825
00:28:55.699 --> 00:28:59.624
Because you can be elite if you stay restless when your competition is.

826
00:28:59.945 --> 00:29:00.742
When you reload,

827
00:29:00.968 --> 00:29:01.687
when others relax,

828
00:29:01.788 --> 00:29:02.765
that's when you become elite,

829
00:29:02.929 --> 00:29:03.124
right?

830
00:29:03.265 --> 00:29:04.585
Talent doesn't have much to do with it.

831
00:29:05.687 --> 00:29:06.171
Like I said,

832
00:29:06.210 --> 00:29:07.273
I call myself the achieving.

833
00:29:07.274 --> 00:29:08.679
I'm a little bit of an achieving average.

834
00:29:08.695 --> 00:29:09.929
It's a little bit of a play on words.

835
00:29:10.773 --> 00:29:12.070
When I say I'm an achieving average,

836
00:29:12.071 --> 00:29:12.413
it doesn't,

837
00:29:12.632 --> 00:29:12.882
you know,

838
00:29:13.117 --> 00:29:14.163
I'm not a,

839
00:29:14.398 --> 00:29:14.679
you know,

840
00:29:14.804 --> 00:29:16.179
I manage to do some pretty neat things,

841
00:29:16.226 --> 00:29:17.460
but I'm not a very gifted person.

842
00:29:17.944 --> 00:29:27.914
I say when I say I'm an achieving average what I mean is if you were to aggregate all my gifts and abilities you'd find me to be a high C or a low B in just about everything except for looks.

843
00:29:28.211 --> 00:29:29.235
I'm a good looking guy.

844
00:29:29.236 --> 00:29:30.055
It's an A plus.

845
00:29:30.157 --> 00:29:31.196
It is what it is man.

846
00:29:31.274 --> 00:29:32.680
I was intimidated.

847
00:29:32.681 --> 00:29:34.375
I know it happens all the time.

848
00:29:34.407 --> 00:29:35.157
It happens all the time.

849
00:29:35.158 --> 00:29:35.782
He's really gonna.

850
00:29:36.000 --> 00:29:41.500
I walked out of the house this morning I caught a glimpse of myself in a mirror and I turned to look at my bride of almost 30 years and I said babe

851
00:29:42.047 --> 00:29:44.266
I can turn it down but I can't turn it off.

852
00:29:45.496 --> 00:29:46.417
And she had a lucky woman.

853
00:29:46.437 --> 00:29:46.917
She laughed.

854
00:29:46.918 --> 00:29:48.158
She was pretty hurt.

855
00:29:48.619 --> 00:29:51.084
And so,

856
00:29:51.123 --> 00:29:51.302
like,

857
00:29:52.162 --> 00:29:54.505
in the origin story of the achieving average is,

858
00:29:54.568 --> 00:29:54.748
like,

859
00:29:54.888 --> 00:29:56.724
I was so invisible as a football player.

860
00:29:56.888 --> 00:29:57.044
Like,

861
00:29:57.068 --> 00:29:58.451
this is how bad I was as a football player.

862
00:29:59.709 --> 00:30:01.537
I love football way sooner than football loved me.

863
00:30:02.427 --> 00:30:02.646
And so,

864
00:30:02.647 --> 00:30:03.787
I remember I was in eighth grade,

865
00:30:03.834 --> 00:30:04.771
Brandenburg Middle School,

866
00:30:04.880 --> 00:30:06.380
and I was the fifth-string fullback,

867
00:30:06.490 --> 00:30:07.724
which wouldn't have been a big deal,

868
00:30:07.740 --> 00:30:08.959
but there were three of the fullbacks.

869
00:30:09.396 --> 00:30:10.802
And even that wouldn't have been a big deal.

870
00:30:11.115 --> 00:30:12.099
And I remember my dad said,

871
00:30:12.146 --> 00:30:12.302
son,

872
00:30:12.303 --> 00:30:13.959
I'm not disappointed you're the fifth-string fullback.

873
00:30:14.404 --> 00:30:15.805
I'm disappointed they wrote it in the program.

874
00:30:15.845 --> 00:30:16.126
I'm like,

875
00:30:16.166 --> 00:30:16.286
what?

876
00:30:16.287 --> 00:30:18.207
It was in the program.

877
00:30:18.367 --> 00:30:18.508
One,

878
00:30:18.509 --> 00:30:18.629
two,

879
00:30:18.687 --> 00:30:18.847
three,

880
00:30:18.886 --> 00:30:19.168
blank,

881
00:30:19.269 --> 00:30:19.668
five.

882
00:30:19.669 --> 00:30:20.011
I was like,

883
00:30:20.109 --> 00:30:21.832
God.

884
00:30:22.574 --> 00:30:23.035
What happened?

885
00:30:23.051 --> 00:30:23.574
Number four.

886
00:30:23.613 --> 00:30:25.035
There was no number four.

887
00:30:25.113 --> 00:30:25.355
Yeah.

888
00:30:25.597 --> 00:30:27.316
This is not even a good movie.

889
00:30:27.480 --> 00:30:30.082
Jonathan McCurdy from Guard to the four-string fullback,

890
00:30:30.136 --> 00:30:30.418
right?

891
00:30:30.480 --> 00:30:30.902
And I was like,

892
00:30:30.903 --> 00:30:31.215
man.

893
00:30:31.746 --> 00:30:34.199
And so the only way I could be visible to coaches,

894
00:30:34.246 --> 00:30:35.871
I'd pick up all the pads after practice,

895
00:30:35.918 --> 00:30:36.152
right?

896
00:30:36.153 --> 00:30:37.027
And I'd try to take them in.

897
00:30:37.511 --> 00:30:38.855
And I remember one practice I was.

898
00:30:39.448 --> 00:30:42.248
I was picking up the pads and I was gotten to the back door and I was knocking on the door.

899
00:30:42.268 --> 00:30:43.008
No one answered the door.

900
00:30:43.009 --> 00:30:43.268
I was like,

901
00:30:43.289 --> 00:30:43.368
oh,

902
00:30:43.369 --> 00:30:44.207
they're just messing with me.

903
00:30:44.688 --> 00:30:47.090
Then I turned to look and coaches were leaving.

904
00:30:47.211 --> 00:30:49.067
Like they're in their cars leaving for the day.

905
00:30:49.707 --> 00:30:50.028
I was like,

906
00:30:50.293 --> 00:30:50.489
oh.

907
00:30:50.707 --> 00:30:53.770
So I remember I dove in front of my coach's cars and he hit me.

908
00:30:53.973 --> 00:30:55.270
I was in pads,

909
00:30:55.271 --> 00:30:55.817
so it was fine.

910
00:30:56.457 --> 00:30:57.957
And he gets out.

911
00:30:57.958 --> 00:30:58.207
He goes,

912
00:30:58.410 --> 00:30:58.535
hey,

913
00:30:58.567 --> 00:30:59.911
why are you just like one of my football players?

914
00:30:59.926 --> 00:31:00.145
I'm like,

915
00:31:00.239 --> 00:31:01.457
I am one of your football players.

916
00:31:02.489 --> 00:31:03.676
I'm trying to take the pads in.

917
00:31:03.770 --> 00:31:05.036
So he came and he let me in.

918
00:31:05.592 --> 00:31:06.553
And I'm bringing in the pads.

919
00:31:06.594 --> 00:31:06.933
He's like,

920
00:31:06.934 --> 00:31:07.254
you know what,

921
00:31:07.314 --> 00:31:07.535
son,

922
00:31:07.574 --> 00:31:08.314
when you're in eighth grade,

923
00:31:08.315 --> 00:31:09.115
you can be on this football team.

924
00:31:09.116 --> 00:31:09.355
I'm like,

925
00:31:09.435 --> 00:31:10.097
I'm in eighth grade.

926
00:31:10.117 --> 00:31:12.258
I've been on this football team for two years,

927
00:31:12.320 --> 00:31:12.519
right?

928
00:31:13.898 --> 00:31:14.781
So I had to decide.

929
00:31:14.782 --> 00:31:15.062
I was like,

930
00:31:15.179 --> 00:31:15.500
okay,

931
00:31:15.601 --> 00:31:15.781
well,

932
00:31:16.086 --> 00:31:16.320
you know,

933
00:31:16.406 --> 00:31:17.344
why am I playing football,

934
00:31:17.406 --> 00:31:17.664
right?

935
00:31:17.781 --> 00:31:18.804
But this is where my friends were.

936
00:31:19.828 --> 00:31:21.226
It's where I was learning about myself.

937
00:31:21.289 --> 00:31:23.554
I wanted to be a part of something bigger than myself.

938
00:31:23.555 --> 00:31:24.164
So I remember I went out,

939
00:31:24.165 --> 00:31:25.336
and I still have a piece of paper

940
00:31:26.304 --> 00:31:26.789
I wrote down,

941
00:31:27.179 --> 00:31:28.679
and I called the achievement equation.

942
00:31:29.992 --> 00:31:30.570
And it.

943
00:31:31.344 --> 00:31:31.625
For me,

944
00:31:31.725 --> 00:31:32.985
everything comes down to math,

945
00:31:33.107 --> 00:31:33.706
simple math,

946
00:31:33.786 --> 00:31:34.046
right?

947
00:31:34.087 --> 00:31:34.648
And so for me,

948
00:31:34.649 --> 00:31:39.589
the achievement equation is angles plus allies plus advantages equals achievement.

949
00:31:40.534 --> 00:31:42.034
And I remember when I wrote that down,

950
00:31:42.035 --> 00:31:44.761
it was kind of cool because for me,

951
00:31:45.159 --> 00:31:47.605
angles and allies is two-thirds of the equation.

952
00:31:48.073 --> 00:31:48.245
Yeah.

953
00:31:48.495 --> 00:31:49.261
And advantages,

954
00:31:49.323 --> 00:31:49.558
you know,

955
00:31:49.559 --> 00:31:49.808
for me,

956
00:31:49.823 --> 00:31:51.511
advantages are talent and treasure.

957
00:31:51.761 --> 00:31:52.026
People go,

958
00:31:52.058 --> 00:31:52.339
time?

959
00:31:52.370 --> 00:31:52.526
Like,

960
00:31:52.527 --> 00:31:52.651
no.

961
00:31:53.198 --> 00:31:54.995
Talent and treasure just buy you more time.

962
00:31:55.167 --> 00:31:56.042
But time in and of itself,

963
00:31:56.043 --> 00:31:57.105
we all have the same amount of.

964
00:31:57.745 --> 00:31:58.730
But the math for me is like,

965
00:31:58.745 --> 00:31:58.870
hey,

966
00:31:58.917 --> 00:31:59.073
man,

967
00:31:59.089 --> 00:32:00.558
if I get great angles.

968
00:32:01.112 --> 00:32:04.395
and I surround myself with people who mean what they say as much as I mean what I say,

969
00:32:04.856 --> 00:32:07.278
then I should be able to beat someone that just has more advantages.

970
00:32:07.700 --> 00:32:09.918
And that equation has driven my entire life.

971
00:32:10.137 --> 00:32:13.325
It is the story of Navy football when we were there and we're at our peak.

972
00:32:14.106 --> 00:32:14.309
Like,

973
00:32:14.442 --> 00:32:14.606
hey,

974
00:32:14.723 --> 00:32:15.723
we play Notre Dame.

975
00:32:15.950 --> 00:32:17.543
There's going to be a gap in advantages,

976
00:32:17.575 --> 00:32:17.887
you know,

977
00:32:17.903 --> 00:32:19.246
when it comes to talent and treasure.

978
00:32:20.278 --> 00:32:21.496
But that's only a third of the equation.

979
00:32:22.153 --> 00:32:22.309
Like,

980
00:32:22.310 --> 00:32:23.731
if I've got angles and allies,

981
00:32:24.215 --> 00:32:26.278
I've got your ass of all your advantages.

982
00:32:26.700 --> 00:32:26.825
Now,

983
00:32:26.856 --> 00:32:29.575
what's really scary in all the great ways,

984
00:32:30.328 --> 00:32:50.244
as you have and this is kind of the arc of ray lewis right ray had extraordinarily advantages right lots of talent yeah and then when the angles and the allies came alongside that talent you're just like this could be a tough day man yeah tony gonzalez i remember we played tony gonzalez in the loha bowl when he was a cow and

985
00:32:50.245 --> 00:32:59.681
he he screwed me up pretty big because i was kind of like a water boy like manufactured hatred and you know anger was my fuel i remember first play he And I hit him.

986
00:32:59.864 --> 00:33:22.003
push him in the helmet shut him in the head like i'm gonna be here all day this dude jumps up and he pats me on the helmet and he goes 51 you're a great linebacker i really enjoyed preparing to play you and thank you for serving our nation and he just trot off the line i was like it's like it's for the whole rest of the game protecting i'm like he's down like don't hit him and i called him sir and i was like okay sure like he just screwed me up but

987
00:33:22.065 --> 00:33:28.768
that's an example where like him and larry fitzgerald and and you know brady what you have is you have

988
00:33:29.072 --> 00:33:44.046
these advantages but when you put angles understanding your craft and you put allies great teammates and so buds for us is where you develop the allies like there's only way to forge that level of camaraderie is time and suffering that's it yeah so

989
00:33:44.047 --> 00:33:51.186
if you don't have time what do you have suffering right and so we suffered and then you figure out who means what they say right and so Boom.

990
00:33:52.030 --> 00:33:52.290
You know,

991
00:33:53.111 --> 00:33:55.093
I don't remember what question you asked.

992
00:33:55.094 --> 00:33:56.476
My meds ain't kicked in yet.

993
00:33:56.477 --> 00:33:56.937
They will.

994
00:33:57.117 --> 00:33:57.374
I mean,

995
00:33:57.375 --> 00:33:58.757
it should be great on my meds kick in.

996
00:33:58.758 --> 00:34:00.257
We're talking about the difference between elite and.

997
00:34:00.640 --> 00:34:00.820
Yeah.

998
00:34:00.859 --> 00:34:02.460
And I would love to go in those four pillars,

999
00:34:02.562 --> 00:34:03.421
like balance,

1000
00:34:03.460 --> 00:34:04.038
curiosity.

1001
00:34:04.484 --> 00:34:04.640
Yeah.

1002
00:34:04.781 --> 00:34:05.304
Tribal.

1003
00:34:05.406 --> 00:34:06.421
I call them the,

1004
00:34:06.702 --> 00:34:07.906
I call them the pursuit points.

1005
00:34:09.234 --> 00:34:09.890
Cause my whole thing is,

1006
00:34:09.891 --> 00:34:10.015
Hey,

1007
00:34:10.046 --> 00:34:10.734
pursue elite.

1008
00:34:11.062 --> 00:34:12.577
And these are the mechanisms we should do it.

1009
00:34:12.609 --> 00:34:13.015
So for me,

1010
00:34:13.031 --> 00:34:13.171
there's,

1011
00:34:13.593 --> 00:34:14.452
there's five pursuit points.

1012
00:34:14.453 --> 00:34:15.046
There's balance,

1013
00:34:15.109 --> 00:34:15.687
curiosity,

1014
00:34:16.031 --> 00:34:16.734
tribalism,

1015
00:34:16.874 --> 00:34:17.702
intentionalism,

1016
00:34:17.734 --> 00:34:18.515
and authenticity.

1017
00:34:18.516 --> 00:34:19.093
There you go.

1018
00:34:19.531 --> 00:34:19.937
And for me,

1019
00:34:20.093 --> 00:34:20.906
balance is not.

1020
00:34:21.214 --> 00:34:24.578
an equal distribution of effort and time because it's not realistic,

1021
00:34:24.617 --> 00:34:25.039
right?

1022
00:34:25.040 --> 00:34:26.000
Right.

1023
00:34:26.597 --> 00:34:29.324
What I tell people is balance is building high ground for hard days.

1024
00:34:29.683 --> 00:34:30.527
Right.

1025
00:34:30.528 --> 00:34:31.441
Because here's what you know,

1026
00:34:31.442 --> 00:34:38.137
you're going to have a hard day and you better have friends and family and faith that can remind you who you are and what you're about when the world tries to make you forget.

1027
00:34:38.138 --> 00:34:39.512
Because that's what the world's going to do.

1028
00:34:39.668 --> 00:34:41.137
The world craves equilibrium.

1029
00:34:41.762 --> 00:34:43.152
It doesn't like extraordinary.

1030
00:34:43.402 --> 00:34:44.933
And so it's going to try to regulate that.

1031
00:34:44.934 --> 00:34:49.402
It's going to try to bring and you got to have these here's the most elite people I've always known.

1032
00:34:50.294 --> 00:35:13.903
hey i know i'm going to need you and i don't know when so i need to invest in nurture if i could if i expect you to be there for me when i need you and i know i don't know i'm going to need you then i have to nurture that relationship like i never want to be the guy that when someone calls to go he must want something oh yeah i'll never i'll never i'll never see i'll never be that guy i'll never mean to be that guy mechanically it may have happened but it's never mine right and

1033
00:35:13.981 --> 00:35:19.388
um you know like we're joking we're talking about scripture like hey man when i'm

1034
00:35:19.774 --> 00:35:20.454
When I'm on it,

1035
00:35:20.554 --> 00:35:22.114
I don't have time to find the scripture.

1036
00:35:22.115 --> 00:35:23.697
I need to know it in the top of my head,

1037
00:35:23.755 --> 00:35:23.935
right?

1038
00:35:25.216 --> 00:35:27.657
If you ask Kim and I a malfunction drill at the same time,

1039
00:35:27.658 --> 00:35:28.400
we both will give you a tap,

1040
00:35:28.439 --> 00:35:28.556
right,

1041
00:35:28.579 --> 00:35:28.798
bang.

1042
00:35:28.993 --> 00:35:30.697
It's so ingrained in us,

1043
00:35:30.698 --> 00:35:31.720
we don't have to think about it,

1044
00:35:31.736 --> 00:35:31.978
right?

1045
00:35:32.017 --> 00:35:36.181
And so balance is having an answer for what to do when it all goes wrong,

1046
00:35:36.337 --> 00:35:37.556
even if you do everything right.

1047
00:35:38.212 --> 00:35:38.478
For me,

1048
00:35:39.118 --> 00:35:41.337
I'll slow down real quick.

1049
00:35:41.415 --> 00:35:41.853
So for me,

1050
00:35:41.915 --> 00:35:43.165
this isn't a math equation.

1051
00:35:43.181 --> 00:35:45.681
It's not balance plus curiosity plus trialism.

1052
00:35:46.242 --> 00:36:01.620
plus intentional plus authenticity for me they're five lanes on the interstate to where you said you want to go and at any time one may be more dominant than the other sure but you had to have situation awareness on the other four but i as soon as i say that what i will tell you is

1053
00:36:01.635 --> 00:36:04.057
if you get for me curiosity is the on-ramp

1054
00:36:05.502 --> 00:36:06.043
It is,

1055
00:36:06.163 --> 00:36:08.485
it is because if you get curiosity,

1056
00:36:08.585 --> 00:36:08.847
right,

1057
00:36:09.448 --> 00:36:10.948
it kind of facilitates the others.

1058
00:36:10.987 --> 00:36:11.206
Right.

1059
00:36:11.288 --> 00:36:11.409
So,

1060
00:36:12.050 --> 00:36:12.390
and for me,

1061
00:36:12.448 --> 00:36:14.448
one of the things I love about curiosity is it's a,

1062
00:36:14.589 --> 00:36:18.433
it's a declaration of I'm not done yet by asking questions.

1063
00:36:18.456 --> 00:36:19.636
You're telling me you're in,

1064
00:36:19.894 --> 00:36:20.034
like,

1065
00:36:20.035 --> 00:36:20.355
you're not,

1066
00:36:20.440 --> 00:36:21.214
you're not complacent.

1067
00:36:21.245 --> 00:36:21.464
Right.

1068
00:36:21.480 --> 00:36:22.323
So I,

1069
00:36:22.558 --> 00:36:22.792
for me,

1070
00:36:22.855 --> 00:36:23.917
curiosity is five things.

1071
00:36:23.980 --> 00:36:24.105
It's,

1072
00:36:24.308 --> 00:36:24.417
it's,

1073
00:36:24.558 --> 00:36:25.355
it's criteria.

1074
00:36:25.776 --> 00:36:27.245
It determines our compatibility.

1075
00:36:28.058 --> 00:36:28.339
Um,

1076
00:36:28.745 --> 00:36:30.745
if I've got five years and you've got two.

1077
00:36:31.742 --> 00:36:47.743
um conflict is imminent unless i know you got two if i know you got two and i got five i want to make these two the best years of your life right like but if we're unequally yoked from our horizons perspective there's going to be conflict there and i love you too much and i like you one day so

1078
00:36:47.758 --> 00:37:00.696
let me figure out what your horizon is and we don't have to have the same horizons right like i love people ending well man i'm not trying to vilify being done i'm just saying if you're done tell me because i want you to be done in a way that's spectacular and better than you ever

1079
00:37:00.742 --> 00:37:15.797
could have imagined right so for me we got to figure out what those horizons are and and so for me curiosity if you're not curious and i am let's call it now right um the second thing is curiosity is courage and

1080
00:37:15.798 --> 00:37:26.992
he's co-equal and precursor to physical courage and i and i'm not diminishing physical courage when i when i say that i know physical courage i mean i'm around men and women of valor

1081
00:37:27.466 --> 00:37:28.087
all the time.

1082
00:37:28.327 --> 00:37:29.467
John's an example of this.

1083
00:37:29.709 --> 00:37:32.893
We went to an institution that teaches this.

1084
00:37:33.951 --> 00:37:35.518
I'm not diminishing physical courage.

1085
00:37:36.416 --> 00:37:38.080
What I'm saying is you're brave because you had to be.

1086
00:37:40.557 --> 00:37:42.182
There's an element of inevitability to it.

1087
00:37:42.183 --> 00:37:42.744
You got to,

1088
00:37:42.823 --> 00:37:43.737
you're not going to make it.

1089
00:37:44.596 --> 00:37:49.549
That's what raises curiosity to the train of courage is because it's scalable.

1090
00:37:49.565 --> 00:37:51.502
All you do is not do this and no one else.

1091
00:37:51.612 --> 00:37:53.955
You don't know.

1092
00:37:53.987 --> 00:37:54.237
For me,

1093
00:37:55.190 --> 00:37:56.049
why don't we do this?

1094
00:37:57.146 --> 00:37:59.448
I'll only speak for myself,

1095
00:37:59.468 --> 00:37:59.810
right?

1096
00:37:59.849 --> 00:38:00.390
51-year-old man,

1097
00:38:00.829 --> 00:38:01.751
somewhat accomplished,

1098
00:38:01.931 --> 00:38:03.111
been really fortunate.

1099
00:38:03.673 --> 00:38:04.353
And to this day,

1100
00:38:04.732 --> 00:38:06.833
when I'm in a room full of people that I respect and admire,

1101
00:38:06.834 --> 00:38:07.216
to this day,

1102
00:38:07.239 --> 00:38:10.982
I would not let them know my stomach will not be questioned because I'd rather them think I know.

1103
00:38:11.943 --> 00:38:12.763
I'd rather you think I know.

1104
00:38:13.263 --> 00:38:14.122
I'm afraid of the answer.

1105
00:38:14.185 --> 00:38:15.638
I'm afraid of the word that comes with the answer.

1106
00:38:16.341 --> 00:38:17.669
I'm afraid of admitting myself.

1107
00:38:18.232 --> 00:38:18.544
I don't know.

1108
00:38:18.545 --> 00:38:20.388
I'm afraid of what you'll think about me when you find out.

1109
00:38:20.404 --> 00:38:20.825
I don't know.

1110
00:38:21.513 --> 00:38:24.700
That's always been the definition of courage is action on the face of fear.

1111
00:38:25.046 --> 00:38:25.186
Yeah,

1112
00:38:25.187 --> 00:38:25.727
exactly.

1113
00:38:25.728 --> 00:38:27.169
So when we see someone doing this,

1114
00:38:27.188 --> 00:38:29.231
we know someone has courage.

1115
00:38:29.251 --> 00:38:31.473
And I find courage to be a prerequisite for any good thing,

1116
00:38:31.493 --> 00:38:31.712
right?

1117
00:38:31.713 --> 00:38:31.852
I agree.

1118
00:38:32.673 --> 00:38:34.274
So curiosity is criteria.

1119
00:38:34.337 --> 00:38:34.899
It's courage.

1120
00:38:35.516 --> 00:38:36.180
It's a creator.

1121
00:38:37.860 --> 00:38:38.938
I don't want to answer for you.

1122
00:38:39.337 --> 00:38:40.923
Every person has their own answers.

1123
00:38:40.977 --> 00:38:41.759
But I will tell you,

1124
00:38:42.680 --> 00:38:46.368
everything in my life that I love is on the other side of the question that scared me.

1125
00:38:46.369 --> 00:38:46.602
Yeah.

1126
00:38:46.743 --> 00:38:48.587
100%.

1127
00:38:48.884 --> 00:38:49.227
Yeah.

1128
00:38:49.243 --> 00:38:49.774
Everything.

1129
00:38:50.446 --> 00:38:50.571
Hey,

1130
00:38:50.587 --> 00:38:51.477
I wonder if I can.

1131
00:38:51.852 --> 00:38:52.696
I wonder if she will.

1132
00:38:52.774 --> 00:38:53.368
like

1133
00:38:54.108 --> 00:38:54.570
everything,

1134
00:38:54.710 --> 00:38:54.930
right?

1135
00:38:55.011 --> 00:38:55.573
Curiosity.

1136
00:38:55.956 --> 00:39:00.661
creates careers and relationships and experiences that we wouldn't trade anything for.

1137
00:39:01.743 --> 00:39:03.622
So curiosity is criteria.

1138
00:39:03.623 --> 00:39:04.126
It's courage.

1139
00:39:04.142 --> 00:39:04.603
It's creative.

1140
00:39:04.604 --> 00:39:05.329
It's a catalyst.

1141
00:39:06.204 --> 00:39:08.024
And this is something that we love about our community.

1142
00:39:08.048 --> 00:39:10.509
Our community is like there is no static in our community.

1143
00:39:10.587 --> 00:39:13.267
Like you're either getting better or declining,

1144
00:39:13.360 --> 00:39:13.688
right?

1145
00:39:13.970 --> 00:39:17.813
And like I use swimming as an example for this a lot.

1146
00:39:17.860 --> 00:39:19.063
Like I love water sports.

1147
00:39:19.079 --> 00:39:21.423
And the reason I love water sports is because the water always works.

1148
00:39:22.553 --> 00:39:22.793
I mean,

1149
00:39:23.494 --> 00:39:24.634
there's humility that comes with water.

1150
00:39:24.654 --> 00:39:27.579
Like everybody's fighting for second because the water is going to win.

1151
00:39:27.658 --> 00:39:28.837
Like water is undefeated.

1152
00:39:29.259 --> 00:39:36.048
I think that's what makes us kind of unique in the landscape of special operations is the water humbles us and we know it.

1153
00:39:36.189 --> 00:39:38.704
So we're not peers with the water.

1154
00:39:39.908 --> 00:39:40.704
And I tell people all the time,

1155
00:39:40.705 --> 00:39:45.408
like Michael Phelps was the fastest person on the planet at not dying in the water.

1156
00:39:46.720 --> 00:39:48.595
He doesn't die in the water fast,

1157
00:39:48.658 --> 00:39:48.954
right?

1158
00:39:49.173 --> 00:39:50.533
Because he knows the water's rules.

1159
00:39:50.832 --> 00:39:51.933
You don't follow the water's rules,

1160
00:39:52.454 --> 00:39:53.114
you're going to die.

1161
00:39:53.915 --> 00:39:54.155
And

1162
00:39:55.439 --> 00:39:57.177
Phelps' career is fascinating.

1163
00:39:57.259 --> 00:40:00.024
If you look at some interviews for his last Olympics,

1164
00:40:00.025 --> 00:40:01.743
he says something that's pretty remarkable.

1165
00:40:02.181 --> 00:40:02.524
He says,

1166
00:40:02.564 --> 00:40:04.087
this is the first Olympics I trained for.

1167
00:40:05.189 --> 00:40:05.524
You're like,

1168
00:40:05.525 --> 00:40:05.743
what?

1169
00:40:06.345 --> 00:40:06.470
Now,

1170
00:40:06.587 --> 00:40:07.024
of course,

1171
00:40:07.071 --> 00:40:07.509
he trained.

1172
00:40:07.571 --> 00:40:08.384
He's not scared to train.

1173
00:40:08.993 --> 00:40:13.462
But what he's saying is this is the first Olympics he couldn't just show up and be better than everybody else.

1174
00:40:14.274 --> 00:40:17.415
And so he started training with this kind of righteous fear,

1175
00:40:17.774 --> 00:40:19.681
this urgency that righteous fear gives us.

1176
00:40:20.348 --> 00:40:21.108
And because he did,

1177
00:40:21.228 --> 00:40:23.568
he produced an Olympics that we still talk about it,

1178
00:40:23.589 --> 00:40:23.910
right?

1179
00:40:23.911 --> 00:40:24.767
Yeah.

1180
00:40:24.768 --> 00:40:26.228
And I tell people all the time,

1181
00:40:26.248 --> 00:40:26.388
like,

1182
00:40:26.431 --> 00:40:27.849
I have very few regrets.

1183
00:40:28.509 --> 00:40:29.970
I don't think I'd do anything different,

1184
00:40:30.072 --> 00:40:31.572
but I would do everything differently.

1185
00:40:33.189 --> 00:40:34.087
I'd do nothing different,

1186
00:40:34.088 --> 00:40:35.494
but I'd do almost everything differently.

1187
00:40:36.244 --> 00:40:39.072
And if I could go back and tell the 24-year-old Clint anything,

1188
00:40:39.728 --> 00:40:39.994
I'd say,

1189
00:40:40.072 --> 00:40:40.290
hey,

1190
00:40:40.572 --> 00:40:42.134
ask more questions than you want to.

1191
00:40:42.540 --> 00:40:43.931
Listen longer than you think you have to.

1192
00:40:43.932 --> 00:40:44.056
Yeah,

1193
00:40:44.478 --> 00:40:44.697
right.

1194
00:40:44.775 --> 00:40:45.759
That's what I would tell him to do.

1195
00:40:45.760 --> 00:40:46.228
For sure.

1196
00:40:46.229 --> 00:40:47.400
And

1197
00:40:48.072 --> 00:40:49.040
I think I'd be here today,

1198
00:40:49.134 --> 00:40:49.290
but,

1199
00:40:49.369 --> 00:40:49.619
you know.

1200
00:40:49.836 --> 00:41:06.173
thinner more hair less scars right but i'd still i'd still be here right and so for me kuros is a catalyst and yeah and the last thing is you know kuros is criteria it's a it's courage it's creator it's a catalyst and it's a complacency killer and complacency is a killer i

1201
00:41:06.189 --> 00:41:17.986
guess oh yeah well that's the average it's in the supply chain of every disaster every it's in the cocktail of any it's it's just always there and people tell me like man there's no for me there's no discipline

1202
00:41:19.024 --> 00:41:21.325
about not being complacent other than just staying curious.

1203
00:41:21.364 --> 00:41:22.624
Like curiosity and complacency,

1204
00:41:22.704 --> 00:41:23.544
they're incompatible.

1205
00:41:24.607 --> 00:41:26.364
So if you're curious- You're not asking questions.

1206
00:41:26.365 --> 00:41:27.103
By default,

1207
00:41:27.267 --> 00:41:28.329
you reject complacency.

1208
00:41:28.806 --> 00:41:30.626
So there's no like how to become less complacent.

1209
00:41:30.704 --> 00:41:34.243
It's more like how I stay curious because if I stay curious by default,

1210
00:41:34.267 --> 00:41:35.384
I'm rejecting complacency.

1211
00:41:35.431 --> 00:41:35.634
Right.

1212
00:41:36.368 --> 00:41:37.743
And when we choose curiosity,

1213
00:41:38.025 --> 00:41:38.962
a few things happen.

1214
00:41:39.587 --> 00:41:39.728
One,

1215
00:41:39.729 --> 00:41:41.197
we get better.

1216
00:41:41.728 --> 00:41:42.384
Like we had,

1217
00:41:42.447 --> 00:41:44.837
this is what our senior listed a remarkable man.

1218
00:41:45.724 --> 00:41:46.706
And he's got his own stories.

1219
00:41:46.725 --> 00:41:47.286
I got mine too.

1220
00:41:47.305 --> 00:41:48.327
Like when you're a new guy,

1221
00:41:48.366 --> 00:41:50.167
like you're throwing everything on you.

1222
00:41:50.249 --> 00:41:51.549
Like you look like a mule.

1223
00:41:51.690 --> 00:41:52.190
Like you got,

1224
00:41:52.932 --> 00:41:53.452
you know,

1225
00:41:53.635 --> 00:41:55.393
and the funny thing is guys like,

1226
00:41:55.394 --> 00:41:56.354
is that where you're wearing your knife?

1227
00:41:56.377 --> 00:41:56.792
You're like,

1228
00:41:56.793 --> 00:41:57.073
God damn it.

1229
00:41:57.074 --> 00:41:57.698
You got to go read.

1230
00:41:57.995 --> 00:42:00.862
You walk out there wearing their knife where they told you they're making fun of you.

1231
00:42:00.901 --> 00:42:01.159
He's like,

1232
00:42:02.276 --> 00:42:03.698
and so you do these gear explosions.

1233
00:42:03.776 --> 00:42:05.823
What you find is that the guys get better and older,

1234
00:42:05.838 --> 00:42:07.073
they get leaner and faster.

1235
00:42:07.823 --> 00:42:10.151
And so when the guy that's been on 10 combat deployments is,

1236
00:42:10.932 --> 00:42:11.042
is,

1237
00:42:11.432 --> 00:42:12.635
is not caring as much as you,

1238
00:42:12.713 --> 00:42:14.354
it's probably because he knows more than you.

1239
00:42:14.432 --> 00:42:14.870
Right.

1240
00:42:14.995 --> 00:42:15.198
Right.

1241
00:42:15.580 --> 00:42:15.820
And so,

1242
00:42:16.081 --> 00:42:17.182
and he's embraced all the bigger,

1243
00:42:17.241 --> 00:42:17.581
faster,

1244
00:42:17.642 --> 00:42:17.983
smarter,

1245
00:42:18.003 --> 00:42:18.403
stronger,

1246
00:42:18.523 --> 00:42:19.343
all these other things.

1247
00:42:19.483 --> 00:42:19.605
So,

1248
00:42:19.765 --> 00:42:20.405
so one,

1249
00:42:21.046 --> 00:42:22.526
when you choose curiosity,

1250
00:42:22.706 --> 00:42:23.530
you add new,

1251
00:42:23.585 --> 00:42:23.788
better,

1252
00:42:23.851 --> 00:42:24.249
faster,

1253
00:42:24.288 --> 00:42:25.913
smarter to existing proven,

1254
00:42:25.991 --> 00:42:26.249
skilled,

1255
00:42:26.327 --> 00:42:26.851
experienced,

1256
00:42:26.852 --> 00:42:27.515
and wise.

1257
00:42:29.069 --> 00:42:29.976
But not only that,

1258
00:42:30.218 --> 00:42:33.023
you tend to attract people that are courageous.

1259
00:42:33.741 --> 00:42:35.835
They want to create something they're proud of and be as good as they can be,

1260
00:42:35.836 --> 00:42:36.538
as fast as they can be.

1261
00:42:37.366 --> 00:42:38.569
And that didn't even feel like work,

1262
00:42:38.741 --> 00:42:38.882
man.

1263
00:42:38.929 --> 00:42:40.038
That just feels like adventure,

1264
00:42:40.319 --> 00:42:40.491
right?

1265
00:42:40.492 --> 00:42:40.648
Right.

1266
00:42:40.649 --> 00:42:40.960
Yeah.

1267
00:42:40.961 --> 00:42:41.429
Very true.

1268
00:42:41.913 --> 00:42:42.382
And so like.

1269
00:42:42.804 --> 00:42:58.865
those are the allies you want that's who you want man it's it's it's a criteria piece right so so you know curiosity tribalism you know for me um when you see groups of people you can call them one of four things there's gaggles groups teams and tribes and

1270
00:42:58.866 --> 00:43:10.896
what makes these things different is what yokes them together so gaggles you look at our problems groups are yoked together by preference we like same stuff teams are you together by purpose hey we have a common goal and we need diverse skills.

1271
00:43:11.328 --> 00:43:12.029
to pursue that goal.

1272
00:43:12.089 --> 00:43:12.209
So,

1273
00:43:12.210 --> 00:43:13.790
we align for the pursuit of that goal.

1274
00:43:13.791 --> 00:43:14.530
But sometimes that's all you do,

1275
00:43:14.531 --> 00:43:15.733
it's a declaration of intent.

1276
00:43:15.831 --> 00:43:19.460
Like there's 32 teams in the beginning of every NFL season,

1277
00:43:19.999 --> 00:43:21.241
and if we're only two left,

1278
00:43:21.538 --> 00:43:22.140
right?

1279
00:43:22.538 --> 00:43:24.358
And for me,

1280
00:43:25.421 --> 00:43:27.491
tribes are the highest form of coexistence.

1281
00:43:27.507 --> 00:43:29.444
Like throughout all of human history,

1282
00:43:29.522 --> 00:43:31.632
tribes have affiliated for really two reasons,

1283
00:43:31.741 --> 00:43:32.788
success and survival,

1284
00:43:32.882 --> 00:43:33.163
right?

1285
00:43:34.866 --> 00:43:35.116
And so,

1286
00:43:35.788 --> 00:43:36.851
I say tribes,

1287
00:43:37.429 --> 00:43:38.757
teams are united by purpose,

1288
00:43:39.351 --> 00:43:40.554
Tribes are not by conviction.

1289
00:43:42.054 --> 00:43:42.275
T.E.

1290
00:43:42.375 --> 00:43:43.117
Lawrence once said,

1291
00:43:43.156 --> 00:43:44.660
an opinion could be argued with,

1292
00:43:45.123 --> 00:43:48.170
but a conviction is best shot because you'll hurt for a conviction,

1293
00:43:48.209 --> 00:43:48.529
right?

1294
00:43:49.389 --> 00:43:52.764
And what you see between a team and a tribe is the shedding of the self.

1295
00:43:54.101 --> 00:43:54.441
There you go.

1296
00:43:54.442 --> 00:43:55.021
All right.

1297
00:43:55.041 --> 00:43:57.542
There's a shedding of the self between the team and the tribe,

1298
00:43:57.562 --> 00:43:57.863
right?

1299
00:43:58.402 --> 00:44:01.003
And it manifests itself in speed.

1300
00:44:01.004 --> 00:44:02.664
And the way I say it is like you can see it.

1301
00:44:02.665 --> 00:44:02.867
I go,

1302
00:44:03.343 --> 00:44:04.101
teams row,

1303
00:44:04.304 --> 00:44:05.164
tribes flow.

1304
00:44:05.960 --> 00:44:06.867
There's a reduction.

1305
00:44:06.868 --> 00:44:08.062
There's a fluidity in it,

1306
00:44:08.085 --> 00:44:08.343
right?

1307
00:44:08.382 --> 00:44:10.062
What you're seeing is- It's also a loss of identity.

1308
00:44:10.085 --> 00:44:11.132
You're seeing the shed of the self.

1309
00:44:11.133 --> 00:44:11.289
Right.

1310
00:44:11.290 --> 00:44:12.570
You become like hive mind.

1311
00:44:12.851 --> 00:44:13.023
Listen,

1312
00:44:13.039 --> 00:44:14.867
we talked about the Marine Corps earlier.

1313
00:44:14.868 --> 00:44:16.632
The Marine Corps beats the U out of you.

1314
00:44:17.085 --> 00:44:18.007
And now you're useful.

1315
00:44:18.539 --> 00:44:19.367
And it's beautiful.

1316
00:44:20.007 --> 00:44:23.054
You won't find any SEAL that doesn't respect the Marines.

1317
00:44:23.317 --> 00:44:23.857
I love it.

1318
00:44:23.897 --> 00:44:24.418
All like,

1319
00:44:24.817 --> 00:44:26.178
if we're going somewhere like on freezer,

1320
00:44:26.259 --> 00:44:26.997
I like,

1321
00:44:27.196 --> 00:44:28.618
we just got to worry about them breaking stuff.

1322
00:44:28.619 --> 00:44:29.157
And I was supposed to,

1323
00:44:29.520 --> 00:44:30.059
but they're like,

1324
00:44:30.419 --> 00:44:31.196
that's not with us.

1325
00:44:31.298 --> 00:44:32.376
Not a peacekeeping force.

1326
00:44:32.423 --> 00:44:32.602
Right.

1327
00:44:33.157 --> 00:44:34.282
Those boys are there to get you.

1328
00:44:34.641 --> 00:44:35.579
And I love it about them.

1329
00:44:35.618 --> 00:44:35.837
Right.

1330
00:44:35.860 --> 00:44:38.243
But so,

1331
00:44:39.079 --> 00:44:39.313
you know,

1332
00:44:40.157 --> 00:44:42.595
and that's kind of what buds is buds beats the,

1333
00:44:42.657 --> 00:44:43.157
you out of you.

1334
00:44:43.220 --> 00:44:44.079
So now you're useful.

1335
00:44:44.220 --> 00:44:44.501
Right.

1336
00:44:44.548 --> 00:44:47.782
And that's what I love about team sports and all these other things is,

1337
00:44:48.688 --> 00:44:48.798
is,

1338
00:44:48.938 --> 00:44:49.110
is,

1339
00:44:49.470 --> 00:44:49.579
is,

1340
00:44:49.798 --> 00:44:51.845
is putting healthy distance between.

1341
00:44:52.821 --> 00:45:10.505
you and you right so you get in the perspective right and so um but but for me it's it's i've always that's why i've always chosen really hard things i've chosen really hard things i'm gonna need people around me that are better than me and i'm gonna have to listen to them or i'm not gonna make it right there's this i

1342
00:45:10.506 --> 00:45:20.255
kind of paint myself into the corner of the person i say i want to be right um so balanced curiosity travels intentionalism i think you know he'd tell you this like you know

1343
00:45:22.657 --> 00:45:24.900
When I left the NFL and came into training,

1344
00:45:24.901 --> 00:45:27.603
there was like 250 guys that said they wanted to be SEALs.

1345
00:45:27.604 --> 00:45:27.962
And at the end,

1346
00:45:27.963 --> 00:45:28.943
there was 12 of us left,

1347
00:45:29.001 --> 00:45:29.244
right?

1348
00:45:30.064 --> 00:45:32.126
12 original day one all the way through,

1349
00:45:32.165 --> 00:45:32.423
right?

1350
00:45:32.447 --> 00:45:33.189
That's wild.

1351
00:45:33.190 --> 00:45:33.806
And it's nuts.

1352
00:45:34.165 --> 00:45:34.869
And I want to tell you,

1353
00:45:34.870 --> 00:45:35.072
like,

1354
00:45:35.408 --> 00:45:37.572
there's a meaningful percentage of the guys that didn't make it,

1355
00:45:37.573 --> 00:45:38.033
they got hurt.

1356
00:45:39.392 --> 00:45:40.048
That sucks for them,

1357
00:45:40.111 --> 00:45:40.392
too.

1358
00:45:40.393 --> 00:45:40.455
Oh,

1359
00:45:40.456 --> 00:45:40.658
yeah.

1360
00:45:40.659 --> 00:45:41.048
You know what I mean?

1361
00:45:41.049 --> 00:45:42.158
Because they put all that time in.

1362
00:45:42.173 --> 00:45:42.501
It's awful,

1363
00:45:42.533 --> 00:45:42.783
man.

1364
00:45:42.814 --> 00:45:43.736
You tear your shoulder.

1365
00:45:44.955 --> 00:45:46.517
The body's got to vote,

1366
00:45:46.580 --> 00:45:46.845
man.

1367
00:45:47.064 --> 00:45:47.923
It really does.

1368
00:45:47.924 --> 00:45:48.517
You know,

1369
00:45:48.642 --> 00:45:50.298
Rock Porter just claimed a lot of...

1370
00:45:50.473 --> 00:46:07.268
good team guys tell us about rock board yeah yeah rocks don't care yeah we're actually like oh you're a high school quarterback great face meet the corner over here right like it's just you know so there's some there's some harshness to it but i think all buds exist to figure out who has whose

1371
00:46:07.315 --> 00:46:19.034
conviction is they want to be a team guy vice whose opinion is i want to be a team guy right and it's not that clear it's not all black there's there's dudes that could have made it through training and they just don't want to do what team guys do.

1372
00:46:20.537 --> 00:46:20.777
you know,

1373
00:46:21.458 --> 00:46:21.977
I love that.

1374
00:46:22.038 --> 00:46:23.357
Like be you and what you are.

1375
00:46:23.458 --> 00:46:23.757
Right.

1376
00:46:23.798 --> 00:46:23.917
And,

1377
00:46:24.636 --> 00:46:24.820
and,

1378
00:46:24.859 --> 00:46:24.976
um,

1379
00:46:25.238 --> 00:46:27.480
probably the most talented guy in our class,

1380
00:46:28.515 --> 00:46:29.078
um,

1381
00:46:29.601 --> 00:46:30.539
quit during cake week.

1382
00:46:30.976 --> 00:46:32.062
And he was going to be honor man.

1383
00:46:33.039 --> 00:46:33.500
And he just quit.

1384
00:46:33.578 --> 00:46:35.203
Honor man is the top grad,

1385
00:46:35.398 --> 00:46:35.898
the best grad.

1386
00:46:36.078 --> 00:46:36.359
I mean,

1387
00:46:36.843 --> 00:46:37.640
I've never seen buds.

1388
00:46:37.734 --> 00:46:38.234
And he quit.

1389
00:46:38.640 --> 00:46:38.781
Yeah.

1390
00:46:38.906 --> 00:46:39.562
Because he's like,

1391
00:46:40.296 --> 00:46:41.218
I know what we do as an,

1392
00:46:41.484 --> 00:46:42.625
or as a community.

1393
00:46:42.656 --> 00:46:44.546
And I don't know if I can do that.

1394
00:46:44.796 --> 00:46:47.343
And I don't want to be a liability.

1395
00:46:47.984 --> 00:46:48.656
I want to.

1396
00:46:48.765 --> 00:46:52.089
So he became a helo pilot and he's like,

1397
00:46:52.149 --> 00:46:53.169
I want to rescue people.

1398
00:46:53.310 --> 00:46:54.751
And he's an extraordinary,

1399
00:46:54.770 --> 00:46:55.571
he's a brilliant guy,

1400
00:46:55.610 --> 00:46:57.149
but the know thyself piece,

1401
00:46:57.657 --> 00:46:58.196
when he quit,

1402
00:46:58.352 --> 00:47:01.915
every instructor lined up and shook his hand because of self-awareness it took to,

1403
00:47:02.642 --> 00:47:03.517
he'd made it through training.

1404
00:47:03.518 --> 00:47:05.540
There was no cake weeks the last week.

1405
00:47:05.837 --> 00:47:06.915
It wasn't even a physical.

1406
00:47:07.009 --> 00:47:07.118
No,

1407
00:47:07.431 --> 00:47:07.540
no,

1408
00:47:07.571 --> 00:47:08.087
he made it.

1409
00:47:08.102 --> 00:47:08.946
He even made it.

1410
00:47:09.181 --> 00:47:14.509
He was one of the most mature and profound know thyself moments I'd ever seen.

1411
00:47:14.727 --> 00:47:16.024
And we're betting he's successful today.

1412
00:47:16.134 --> 00:47:16.931
He's incredibly successful.

1413
00:47:16.932 --> 00:47:17.212
There you go.

1414
00:47:17.637 --> 00:47:23.657
And he's universally respected by every instructor and every guy went through buds with no one questions it because it was just this,

1415
00:47:24.017 --> 00:47:28.017
it was the self-awareness that it took the rest of us probably years to kind of cultivate.

1416
00:47:28.103 --> 00:47:28.376
Right.

1417
00:47:28.556 --> 00:47:29.001
If at all.

1418
00:47:29.259 --> 00:47:30.798
Yeah.

1419
00:47:30.821 --> 00:47:31.118
Yeah.

1420
00:47:31.119 --> 00:47:31.939
Cultivating.

1421
00:47:32.079 --> 00:47:32.337
Yeah.

1422
00:47:32.338 --> 00:47:33.220
Be the better way to say it.

1423
00:47:33.243 --> 00:47:33.493
Right.

1424
00:47:33.696 --> 00:47:33.946
Right.

1425
00:47:35.368 --> 00:47:35.603
For me,

1426
00:47:35.681 --> 00:47:39.618
that intentionalism has kind of been the secret sauce for me.

1427
00:47:39.696 --> 00:47:42.149
Like always knowing why I'm doing what I'm doing.

1428
00:47:42.953 --> 00:47:44.294
Because the what's are going to be there.

1429
00:47:44.355 --> 00:47:45.415
And the what's are the one more.

1430
00:47:45.416 --> 00:47:46.236
It's like one more minute,

1431
00:47:46.296 --> 00:47:46.956
one mile.

1432
00:47:47.097 --> 00:47:48.558
And you know why you're doing what you're doing.

1433
00:47:48.559 --> 00:47:49.218
The what's stays small.

1434
00:47:49.219 --> 00:47:50.620
You talk about maps right from the beginning.

1435
00:47:50.621 --> 00:47:51.324
You know where you're going.

1436
00:47:51.325 --> 00:47:51.902
I know where I'm going.

1437
00:47:52.081 --> 00:47:53.245
That's fucking private.

1438
00:47:53.246 --> 00:47:53.824
Yeah.

1439
00:47:54.605 --> 00:47:56.706
This will be a shocker for you.

1440
00:47:56.988 --> 00:47:57.745
He already knows this.

1441
00:47:58.191 --> 00:47:58.847
I'm not a runner.

1442
00:47:59.629 --> 00:48:26.181
you know oh i know i know like you ran before yeah no no i know you know like that that is gazelle you can run for days sweating yeah hot outside i don't like running and we do a lot of running like you run six miles every day to chow and i'm good with that one like i'm fine i'll run that one well you're running the breakfast yeah you know yeah and then you know what you got this eight mile condition runs and i always i always joke when i talk about average i say average has no secrets but but you can't learn anything from average but i was at best an average run

1443
00:48:26.841 --> 00:48:29.044
And you can learn something from that if you're a bigger guy.

1444
00:48:29.204 --> 00:48:29.964
And I always tell guys,

1445
00:48:30.024 --> 00:48:30.245
listen,

1446
00:48:30.246 --> 00:48:31.065
if you're a big dude,

1447
00:48:31.686 --> 00:48:33.428
here's the secret to big man running.

1448
00:48:34.487 --> 00:48:37.147
Lean forward until you're about to fall over,

1449
00:48:37.491 --> 00:48:38.053
then don't.

1450
00:48:40.155 --> 00:48:40.655
Momentum.

1451
00:48:40.678 --> 00:48:43.694
How far you got to go is like a controlled fall.

1452
00:48:43.803 --> 00:48:44.632
Just lean forward.

1453
00:48:44.819 --> 00:48:47.147
One of your academy classmates was my bud's

1454
00:48:47.835 --> 00:48:48.585
OICs. Oh,

1455
00:48:48.616 --> 00:48:48.757
yeah?

1456
00:48:49.100 --> 00:48:49.647
Don Weatherby.

1457
00:48:49.819 --> 00:48:50.210
Oh,

1458
00:48:50.444 --> 00:48:50.569
yeah.

1459
00:48:50.632 --> 00:48:51.460
Don's a big old boy,

1460
00:48:51.538 --> 00:48:51.663
man.

1461
00:48:51.664 --> 00:48:51.928
Yeah.

1462
00:48:52.647 --> 00:48:53.710
He's a different kind of big.

1463
00:48:53.772 --> 00:48:54.725
Don's like a chiseled.

1464
00:48:55.046 --> 00:49:00.700
yeah yeah exactly good look he was he was struggling with the run and and uh he ended up

1465
00:49:01.624 --> 00:49:16.500
learning how to run well doing it man oh yeah he's killing it and uh such a good you'd still waters run deep with that guy yeah he doesn't talk so when he does you need oh yeah that's right um but yeah so and then so the way i always say it is and

1466
00:49:16.501 --> 00:49:30.390
this may be the thing that was my pivot point on the boardroom map is i'd always known why i was doing what i was doing until my early 30s and also in the boardroom and i didn't really know why i was doing what i was doing

1467
00:49:30.716 --> 00:49:31.297
make a lot of money?

1468
00:49:31.877 --> 00:49:32.157
Why?

1469
00:49:33.558 --> 00:49:34.179
And so for me,

1470
00:49:34.320 --> 00:49:36.062
I had to slow down and I had to,

1471
00:49:36.063 --> 00:49:36.702
that's the thing,

1472
00:49:36.703 --> 00:49:37.902
is I reinvented my why.

1473
00:49:37.984 --> 00:49:39.386
And once I figured out my why,

1474
00:49:39.387 --> 00:49:41.027
because you reinvent your whys all the time.

1475
00:49:41.488 --> 00:49:42.628
Like when I was an 18-year-old,

1476
00:49:42.691 --> 00:49:44.667
my why wasn't what I'm about to tell you.

1477
00:49:44.769 --> 00:49:45.792
It was prove people right,

1478
00:49:45.831 --> 00:49:47.198
prove people wrong with every snap,

1479
00:49:47.214 --> 00:49:47.480
right?

1480
00:49:48.480 --> 00:49:49.058
People thought I could,

1481
00:49:49.059 --> 00:49:49.792
I'm going to show them I could.

1482
00:49:49.808 --> 00:49:50.339
People thought I could,

1483
00:49:50.355 --> 00:49:51.198
I'm going to show them I could,

1484
00:49:51.230 --> 00:49:52.620
right?

1485
00:49:52.621 --> 00:49:53.042
So my why,

1486
00:49:53.152 --> 00:49:56.964
when my bride had her first daughter while I was over,

1487
00:49:57.323 --> 00:49:58.730
and it took me longer to figure this out,

1488
00:49:58.777 --> 00:50:00.042
but when we had our

1489
00:50:00.412 --> 00:50:00.993
Third daughter,

1490
00:50:01.793 --> 00:50:02.895
I knew what my why was.

1491
00:50:03.035 --> 00:50:05.437
My why was to be the kind of guy my girls want to marry one day.

1492
00:50:06.637 --> 00:50:06.957
That's it.

1493
00:50:07.879 --> 00:50:09.043
And who I am,

1494
00:50:09.059 --> 00:50:09.418
what I do,

1495
00:50:09.918 --> 00:50:10.621
who I do it for,

1496
00:50:10.965 --> 00:50:11.199
you know,

1497
00:50:11.379 --> 00:50:12.543
and that man's going to be purposeful,

1498
00:50:12.605 --> 00:50:13.004
passionate,

1499
00:50:13.005 --> 00:50:13.863
particular provider.

1500
00:50:14.402 --> 00:50:15.324
If he's not those four things,

1501
00:50:15.325 --> 00:50:17.723
I'm not going to have to scare him off because my girls aren't going to want him.

1502
00:50:18.066 --> 00:50:19.129
And if he is those four things,

1503
00:50:19.754 --> 00:50:20.895
I'm still going to scare him off.

1504
00:50:22.598 --> 00:50:23.316
So I always say

1505
00:50:23.832 --> 00:50:26.035
I believe everybody has to have a high why and a big why.

1506
00:50:26.363 --> 00:50:27.691
And your high why is personal,

1507
00:50:28.379 --> 00:50:29.238
and your big why is personal.

1508
00:50:29.292 --> 00:50:29.773
professional.

1509
00:50:29.833 --> 00:50:30.713
I'll use my time,

1510
00:50:30.714 --> 00:50:31.214
my treasure,

1511
00:50:31.215 --> 00:50:31.875
and my talent.

1512
00:50:32.634 --> 00:50:34.556
And once you get those things,

1513
00:50:34.619 --> 00:50:35.978
it's not that you're unstoppable,

1514
00:50:36.017 --> 00:50:37.041
you just won't stop yourself.

1515
00:50:37.818 --> 00:50:38.560
So my high why,

1516
00:50:38.584 --> 00:50:40.560
I want to be the kind of guy my girls want to marry one day.

1517
00:50:40.865 --> 00:50:41.427
My big why,

1518
00:50:41.482 --> 00:50:46.591
I want to work for the best leaders in America and create amazing careers for veterans and their families as they come home.

1519
00:50:47.857 --> 00:50:50.326
And so commander's intent is what we call it.

1520
00:50:50.388 --> 00:50:55.935
Commander's intent is that cardinal north that you reconcile all future decisions against,

1521
00:50:55.998 --> 00:50:56.216
right?

1522
00:50:56.263 --> 00:50:57.701
And once I figured that out,

1523
00:50:57.732 --> 00:50:58.060
I was like,

1524
00:50:58.341 --> 00:50:58.638
oh.

1525
00:50:59.312 --> 00:51:00.253
Got it.

1526
00:51:00.453 --> 00:51:00.993
And then all of a sudden,

1527
00:51:00.994 --> 00:51:03.255
the boardroom took its right place in my world.

1528
00:51:04.036 --> 00:51:06.821
And what I tell guys is the boardroom is just a gear lock.

1529
00:51:07.978 --> 00:51:09.540
It's a place you use to build,

1530
00:51:10.181 --> 00:51:10.485
guard,

1531
00:51:10.501 --> 00:51:11.782
and grow the breakfast table.

1532
00:51:12.509 --> 00:51:14.228
And once it becomes functional to you,

1533
00:51:14.485 --> 00:51:17.587
like he and I like SIGs because they issued a SIGs.

1534
00:51:18.353 --> 00:51:19.009
That's the pistol.

1535
00:51:19.165 --> 00:51:20.118
But you give him a Glock,

1536
00:51:20.119 --> 00:51:20.853
he can run a Glock.

1537
00:51:21.087 --> 00:51:21.790
He can run an HK.

1538
00:51:22.056 --> 00:51:22.196
Like,

1539
00:51:22.197 --> 00:51:22.712
it doesn't matter.

1540
00:51:22.713 --> 00:51:23.649
I actually love the HK,

1541
00:51:23.650 --> 00:51:23.774
man.

1542
00:51:23.962 --> 00:51:24.118
Yeah,

1543
00:51:24.119 --> 00:51:24.462
they're great.

1544
00:51:24.618 --> 00:51:25.118
They're great.

1545
00:51:25.399 --> 00:51:28.056
But you and I know a bunch of guys are on.

1546
00:51:28.304 --> 00:51:46.177
pretty significant raid and if you went to those guys like hey man you can go to this raid but you can't carry a sig i don't know a single one i'm like well i'm not going all right like you give me a slingshot you have black power i'm going on that thing you're saying bolt's not fast because he's wearing nike he's fast he beat me in crocs right but

1547
00:51:46.178 --> 00:51:53.724
all of a sudden we get out and we'll get these brands that go to work for us our identity and they're not and the analogy i use

1548
00:51:54.068 --> 00:51:54.443
Hey, listen,

1549
00:51:55.083 --> 00:51:56.115
industry is terrain.

1550
00:51:57.188 --> 00:51:59.189
Companies are weapon systems and platforms.

1551
00:51:59.990 --> 00:52:01.232
Leaders are teammates.

1552
00:52:01.233 --> 00:52:02.513
You know,

1553
00:52:02.673 --> 00:52:03.755
finance is jungle.

1554
00:52:04.736 --> 00:52:07.615
Commercial real estate is desert.

1555
00:52:07.662 --> 00:52:07.818
Like,

1556
00:52:07.857 --> 00:52:09.216
it's just a terrain.

1557
00:52:09.318 --> 00:52:10.201
So choose your terrain,

1558
00:52:10.724 --> 00:52:11.623
choose your weapon system,

1559
00:52:11.701 --> 00:52:12.521
choose your teammates,

1560
00:52:12.545 --> 00:52:12.787
and go.

1561
00:52:13.599 --> 00:52:13.802
Right.

1562
00:52:13.865 --> 00:52:16.052
Because the end state is the breakfast table.

1563
00:52:17.115 --> 00:52:17.927
And like I said,

1564
00:52:18.162 --> 00:52:18.646
like for me,

1565
00:52:19.443 --> 00:52:23.849
it took me longer than it should have to kind of recapture that clarity I had on the ball field and the battlefield,

1566
00:52:23.850 --> 00:52:24.709
but once I did.

1567
00:52:25.552 --> 00:52:49.702
on the boardroom i became the version of myself i like the most right and and and for me is um you know everything i do is a is that the kind of guy i want my girls to come home with one day yes or no is come quick because all life's about making decisions it's also i mean they're obviously so close to you i mean they you know you love them so much it's a great way to continually measure how

1568
00:52:49.733 --> 00:52:53.905
you're moving through life yeah and i and i extend that orbit beyond that if i care about you

1569
00:52:54.076 --> 00:52:54.276
Like,

1570
00:52:54.296 --> 00:52:54.516
you know,

1571
00:52:54.517 --> 00:52:54.697
like,

1572
00:52:54.717 --> 00:52:54.857
like,

1573
00:52:55.297 --> 00:52:57.559
like I want to always say,

1574
00:52:57.560 --> 00:52:58.461
if my girls come on the man,

1575
00:52:58.520 --> 00:52:58.782
like me,

1576
00:52:58.783 --> 00:53:00.762
I better be okay with it because that's what I showed him.

1577
00:53:00.961 --> 00:53:01.543
And so for me,

1578
00:53:01.684 --> 00:53:04.469
like I knew what kind of teammate I wanted to be on the battlefield.

1579
00:53:04.508 --> 00:53:05.969
I knew what kind of teammate that I want to be on the,

1580
00:53:06.149 --> 00:53:06.829
on the ball field.

1581
00:53:06.852 --> 00:53:07.711
And okay,

1582
00:53:07.750 --> 00:53:11.735
now I know what teammate I want to be at the breakfast table and the,

1583
00:53:11.875 --> 00:53:12.672
and I tell people like,

1584
00:53:13.891 --> 00:53:14.016
so

1585
00:53:14.735 --> 00:53:15.016
I say,

1586
00:53:15.017 --> 00:53:15.141
Hey,

1587
00:53:15.454 --> 00:53:18.985
my mission is to win the war on veteran suicide with power of daily wins and a good day's work.

1588
00:53:19.844 --> 00:53:23.297
And that'll find daily wins is add value to the kind of person you want to be around and learn from.

1589
00:53:23.329 --> 00:53:23.641
with you.

1590
00:53:23.860 --> 00:53:41.057
already know how to do as you lead a battlefield and come to the boardroom and a good day's work is provide for yourself and those you love adding value to the kind of business leader you want to be around to learn from with what you already know how to do as you leave the battlefield and come to the boardrooms you can be at the breakfast table you said you'd be or

1591
00:53:41.072 --> 00:53:53.385
you want to be when that season of life hits you yeah and once you're there you're like oh all right you know team guys like i want to go on a mortgage i'm like really like yeah mortgages i'm like what okay why i'm Maybe you should be named Freeman Sawyer.

1592
00:53:54.012 --> 00:53:55.333
Freeman Sawyer called me one time and was like,

1593
00:53:55.334 --> 00:53:55.633
Hey man,

1594
00:53:55.634 --> 00:53:58.338
I just brought 400 acres in East Texas in cash and

1595
00:53:58.737 --> 00:54:02.416
I want to make the most adaptive hunting facility in America.

1596
00:54:03.380 --> 00:54:03.720
What do you do?

1597
00:54:03.800 --> 00:54:04.401
I do a mortgage.

1598
00:54:04.402 --> 00:54:04.660
I'm like,

1599
00:54:04.740 --> 00:54:04.861
oh,

1600
00:54:05.021 --> 00:54:06.180
mortgage sounds cooler to me now.

1601
00:54:06.260 --> 00:54:06.401
Like,

1602
00:54:06.420 --> 00:54:06.621
hold on.

1603
00:54:06.622 --> 00:54:07.000
I'm not going to.

1604
00:54:07.022 --> 00:54:07.920
Yeah.

1605
00:54:07.921 --> 00:54:09.541
We weren't cool because we carried cigs.

1606
00:54:10.182 --> 00:54:10.600
So for me,

1607
00:54:11.080 --> 00:54:12.119
when you hold the boardroom,

1608
00:54:13.104 --> 00:54:13.760
not loosely,

1609
00:54:13.822 --> 00:54:15.205
but you recognize it is.

1610
00:54:15.362 --> 00:54:15.502
Like,

1611
00:54:15.580 --> 00:54:16.221
I play football.

1612
00:54:16.283 --> 00:54:17.424
It didn't matter what helmet I had.

1613
00:54:18.143 --> 00:54:18.682
Rydell,

1614
00:54:19.205 --> 00:54:19.541
shoot you.

1615
00:54:19.651 --> 00:54:19.807
Like,

1616
00:54:19.822 --> 00:54:20.307
I don't care.

1617
00:54:20.416 --> 00:54:20.557
Like,

1618
00:54:20.558 --> 00:54:21.182
I love football,

1619
00:54:21.229 --> 00:54:21.510
right?

1620
00:54:21.979 --> 00:54:24.119
And that's the place we need to put the boardroom.

1621
00:54:24.166 --> 00:54:27.619
And you want to be great with whatever you're wearing.

1622
00:54:28.541 --> 00:54:28.838
Man,

1623
00:54:29.947 --> 00:54:32.166
once you look at it as a resource to.

1624
00:54:32.348 --> 00:54:55.366
build garden grow the breakfast table a lot of decisions become easier right well you bring it back to humanity instead of just money you know and i think that people are going to care about you when you're gone right right so like the high white and i believe right as high wise who you are and what they say about you when you're gone and your big wise why do you use your time your treasured talent the way your time your treasured talent and you have those answers life

1625
00:54:55.397 --> 00:54:59.772
is not easy but it is simple right well i mean yeah you know again you have another x in the map

1626
00:54:59.916 --> 00:55:19.231
you know you're fine you know this is what i love so much about john what you've been doing and will as well like that that fifth pursuit point is authenticity right yeah and i tell people like authenticity is what you call vulnerability when you're not scared anymore you're scared is vulnerability that's where we wanted to go yeah we'll get into it but let's talk about definitely both of those yeah like authenticity and

1627
00:55:19.232 --> 00:55:28.309
vulnerability is something we continually what we express on the show as much as we can that's part of our success it's really two of the ingredients of our formula success is like you know

1628
00:55:28.520 --> 00:55:56.605
being authentic not giving a fuck but giving a fuck you know what i mean the sense of like no we're going no we're driving knowing like how uh what we're trying who our audience is what we're trying to speak to them about you know and help them to wake up to but then being vulnerable enough to just like not have all the answers like ask good questions be really curious period man the most the most elite people in the most elite organizations and who are the most authentic ones yeah and and yeah and and there's a more reason why we could dive into that but there's also a categories.

1629
00:55:57.800 --> 00:55:59.222
And I don't care why you're doing the right thing.

1630
00:55:59.242 --> 00:56:00.184
I want you to do the right things.

1631
00:56:00.185 --> 00:56:00.844
It's the right thing.

1632
00:56:00.883 --> 00:56:05.789
But if you're doing the right thing because it's produces an early result,

1633
00:56:05.805 --> 00:56:06.125
that's fine.

1634
00:56:06.148 --> 00:56:07.008
Like I tell these guys like,

1635
00:56:07.031 --> 00:56:07.266
Hey man,

1636
00:56:07.289 --> 00:56:11.414
you're going to make good decisions when it comes to my daughters and you're going to make good decisions because you're a good dude.

1637
00:56:11.415 --> 00:56:13.438
You're gonna make good decisions because you're scared not to.

1638
00:56:13.938 --> 00:56:15.031
And I don't care which one it is.

1639
00:56:15.719 --> 00:56:17.547
I'd love you to make good decisions because you're good dude.

1640
00:56:17.562 --> 00:56:19.422
But if you're doing it because you're scared,

1641
00:56:19.423 --> 00:56:20.141
that's fine with me too.

1642
00:56:20.328 --> 00:56:20.578
Right.

1643
00:56:21.469 --> 00:56:24.406
And for me,

1644
00:56:24.547 --> 00:56:26.531
authenticity is a harvester of time.

1645
00:56:27.468 --> 00:56:28.229
And here's what I mean.

1646
00:56:29.670 --> 00:56:30.492
As a species,

1647
00:56:30.552 --> 00:56:31.693
we've agreed on one thing,

1648
00:56:32.392 --> 00:56:33.134
24-7,

1649
00:56:33.135 --> 00:56:34.173
365.

1650
00:56:34.174 --> 00:56:36.498
We haven't agreed on anything else since then.

1651
00:56:36.576 --> 00:56:39.677
Even the places where the sun doesn't set for six months or rise for six months,

1652
00:56:39.701 --> 00:56:41.505
they still go 24-7,

1653
00:56:41.521 --> 00:56:43.521
365.

1654
00:56:43.522 --> 00:56:46.162
So if we look at mistakes as increments of time,

1655
00:56:47.255 --> 00:56:49.412
we begin to understand the significance of mistakes.

1656
00:56:49.413 --> 00:56:51.099
Because time's irrecoverable.

1657
00:56:52.349 --> 00:56:53.290
You can only save it.

1658
00:56:53.291 --> 00:56:54.351
You can't buy it.

1659
00:56:54.370 --> 00:56:54.911
I mean,

1660
00:56:55.532 --> 00:56:58.595
that's the fundamental decision with Bezos and Amazon.

1661
00:56:59.134 --> 00:56:59.376
Basically,

1662
00:56:59.377 --> 00:57:00.696
the whole thing is you can't buy time.

1663
00:57:00.697 --> 00:57:01.642
You can only save it,

1664
00:57:01.720 --> 00:57:01.954
right?

1665
00:57:02.759 --> 00:57:08.064
And so what authenticity allows you to do is not double down on irrecoverable time.

1666
00:57:08.407 --> 00:57:09.845
And so if we go back to sports for this,

1667
00:57:09.892 --> 00:57:11.736
like every team I ever played,

1668
00:57:11.737 --> 00:57:12.611
me and Army in the clock,

1669
00:57:12.626 --> 00:57:13.689
me and Air Force in the clock,

1670
00:57:13.767 --> 00:57:14.017
me and

1671
00:57:14.657 --> 00:57:15.579
Georgia Tech in the clock.

1672
00:57:16.079 --> 00:57:17.689
The clock didn't care about either one of us.

1673
00:57:17.751 --> 00:57:20.361
We both had 60 minutes at the beginning of the games,

1674
00:57:20.392 --> 00:57:20.611
right?

1675
00:57:21.245 --> 00:57:22.666
And if I make a two-second mistake,

1676
00:57:22.706 --> 00:57:23.968
but I don't tell anybody about it,

1677
00:57:24.766 --> 00:57:26.731
I'm doing 10 other guys to make a two-second mistake.

1678
00:57:26.732 --> 00:57:27.411
Now we lost 20,

1679
00:57:27.673 --> 00:57:27.891
22,

1680
00:57:27.911 --> 00:57:28.876
24 seconds,

1681
00:57:28.915 --> 00:57:29.173
right?

1682
00:57:29.993 --> 00:57:32.376
And so the most authentic organizations,

1683
00:57:32.391 --> 00:57:37.438
they don't double down on the irrecoverable asset that they and the enemy both have the same amount of.

1684
00:57:38.220 --> 00:57:48.235
So authenticity is the most supreme tactical advantage harvester there is because you're harvesting the one thing we have the same amount of.

1685
00:57:48.438 --> 00:57:49.110
Us and Al-Qaeda,

1686
00:57:49.376 --> 00:57:50.126
same amount of time.

1687
00:57:51.237 --> 00:57:52.138
I say the same amount of time.

1688
00:57:52.157 --> 00:57:52.919
We've all got

1689
00:57:53.698 --> 00:57:54.739
60 minutes in an hour.

1690
00:57:55.161 --> 00:57:58.462
And those who steward their time best win because they have more of it,

1691
00:57:58.482 --> 00:57:58.747
right?

1692
00:57:59.247 --> 00:58:01.068
That's why we focus so much on marksmanship.

1693
00:58:01.888 --> 00:58:02.888
Like we miss less.

1694
00:58:02.889 --> 00:58:04.552
And because we miss less,

1695
00:58:04.553 --> 00:58:05.591
we don't have to carry as much.

1696
00:58:06.130 --> 00:58:07.232
And because we don't have to carry as much,

1697
00:58:07.310 --> 00:58:09.028
we're not as tired when we start fighting.

1698
00:58:09.372 --> 00:58:10.763
Like there's a supply chain to it,

1699
00:58:10.794 --> 00:58:11.060
right?

1700
00:58:11.591 --> 00:58:12.091
So for me,

1701
00:58:13.544 --> 00:58:17.466
authenticity is the most tactically advantageous thing you can do.

1702
00:58:17.810 --> 00:58:18.341
But that's not.

1703
00:58:19.316 --> 00:58:19.556
For me,

1704
00:58:19.596 --> 00:58:21.880
the moral advantage of authenticity is good.

1705
00:58:21.899 --> 00:58:22.079
I mean,

1706
00:58:22.960 --> 00:58:24.059
you don't recover time.

1707
00:58:24.442 --> 00:58:28.126
Like if I made a mistake and John was heading towards it and I stop him,

1708
00:58:29.149 --> 00:58:30.188
I don't recover that time.

1709
00:58:31.524 --> 00:58:32.548
But I do redeem it though.

1710
00:58:33.446 --> 00:58:35.727
Like what was maybe minus eight is now maybe minus six,

1711
00:58:35.852 --> 00:58:36.446
minus five.

1712
00:58:36.727 --> 00:58:38.258
It may never be net positive,

1713
00:58:39.274 --> 00:58:39.399
but.

1714
00:58:39.960 --> 00:58:40.821
I said this earlier,

1715
00:58:40.861 --> 00:58:42.902
shame is the shovel that Satan will use to bury you.

1716
00:58:43.584 --> 00:58:45.887
And authenticity slaps that shovel out of his hands.

1717
00:58:47.086 --> 00:58:48.309
And redemption matters.

1718
00:58:48.488 --> 00:58:49.731
Redemption is a big deal.

1719
00:58:50.410 --> 00:59:01.621
And authenticity allows you to claw back time and pride and character from mistakes that we've made in the past.

1720
00:59:01.824 --> 00:59:03.027
What does that look like in the boardroom,

1721
00:59:03.387 --> 00:59:03.949
authenticity?

1722
00:59:03.950 --> 00:59:04.981
You know what I mean?

1723
00:59:05.152 --> 00:59:05.949
Or I,

1724
00:59:05.950 --> 00:59:06.043
I,

1725
00:59:06.168 --> 00:59:06.621
one,

1726
00:59:06.622 --> 00:59:06.746
I,

1727
00:59:07.371 --> 00:59:07.621
for me,

1728
00:59:07.824 --> 00:59:08.387
ethics is.

1729
00:59:09.132 --> 00:59:12.035
It's a biological fact that you have to live with yourself for the rest of your life.

1730
00:59:12.656 --> 00:59:14.277
And ethics determines how that feels,

1731
00:59:14.336 --> 00:59:14.578
right?

1732
00:59:14.598 --> 00:59:15.398
There you go.

1733
00:59:15.578 --> 00:59:16.578
And so authenticity,

1734
00:59:16.879 --> 00:59:17.059
one,

1735
00:59:17.060 --> 00:59:17.660
on the boardroom,

1736
00:59:17.738 --> 00:59:19.926
authenticity provides tremendous competitive advantage.

1737
00:59:19.965 --> 00:59:20.543
There you go.

1738
00:59:20.566 --> 00:59:21.926
Like if I'm faster from A to B,

1739
00:59:22.723 --> 00:59:24.566
because I watch everyone else is getting to A to B,

1740
00:59:25.051 --> 00:59:26.051
it's going to mechanically,

1741
00:59:28.066 --> 00:59:29.191
it's going to produce a faster,

1742
00:59:29.254 --> 00:59:29.488
better,

1743
00:59:29.535 --> 00:59:30.488
more enduring result.

1744
00:59:31.191 --> 00:59:33.473
What I've found in business is,

1745
00:59:33.723 --> 00:59:35.957
especially when you're dealing with really successful people,

1746
00:59:36.957 --> 00:59:38.394
is they crave authenticity.

1747
00:59:39.128 --> 00:59:57.430
you've been often like in in their talent in their delivery or like so like i don't know if there's a person in my company that says sorry more than i do and i'm very if i make a mistake with my clients they're never going to hear about it from anybody but me i'm saying like hey i screwed this up here's why i screwed this up here's how it's never going to happen again and

1748
00:59:57.961 --> 01:00:07.602
in the boardroom people crave authenticity and trust right and and so the authenticity breeds the more someone knows like hey

1749
01:00:08.108 --> 01:00:10.630
I know that dude's going to tell me stuff he doesn't want to tell me.

1750
01:00:10.870 --> 01:00:12.511
And all I want to know is what's going on.

1751
01:00:13.214 --> 01:00:13.394
Like,

1752
01:00:13.433 --> 01:00:13.675
you know,

1753
01:00:13.734 --> 01:00:15.234
some of the young guys we'd work with,

1754
01:00:15.277 --> 01:00:15.495
like,

1755
01:00:15.515 --> 01:00:15.898
if you're,

1756
01:00:16.398 --> 01:00:17.320
if I can trust you,

1757
01:00:18.195 --> 01:00:19.702
then you're just going to get more tasks.

1758
01:00:19.718 --> 01:00:20.640
You're going to get more trust,

1759
01:00:20.679 --> 01:00:20.898
right?

1760
01:00:20.921 --> 01:00:21.038
It's,

1761
01:00:21.718 --> 01:00:21.859
it's,

1762
01:00:23.562 --> 01:00:24.124
you know,

1763
01:00:24.125 --> 01:00:24.546
so for me,

1764
01:00:24.624 --> 01:00:25.202
authenticity,

1765
01:00:25.640 --> 01:00:28.093
I think authenticity is the advantage on all the maps,

1766
01:00:28.390 --> 01:00:28.624
right?

1767
01:00:29.015 --> 01:00:30.030
Because it harvests time.

1768
01:00:30.593 --> 01:00:31.671
You steward time better.

1769
01:00:32.093 --> 01:00:36.374
And time is the only thing that really ultimately matters.

1770
01:00:37.036 --> 01:00:52.400
yeah how do i use the time that i have can't control i can't control how many days i have i have no authorship over that i can influence i cannot do dumb shit right but i'm told control how i steward the days that i have right and so for me authenticity is a stewardship what

1771
01:00:52.416 --> 01:01:05.830
gives you ability to reflect too and then and then recalibrate and then like it well if you want to be a value to others you have to reflect you want to inventory your stakes are like hey dude like i'm proactive you know i surround myself with young guys all the time and i go hey

1772
01:01:07.997 --> 01:01:08.217
And I go,

1773
01:01:08.218 --> 01:01:08.337
hey,

1774
01:01:08.878 --> 01:01:09.198
I did that,

1775
01:01:09.199 --> 01:01:09.820
it doesn't work.

1776
01:01:10.378 --> 01:01:10.538
Right?

1777
01:01:10.640 --> 01:01:10.839
Like,

1778
01:01:10.840 --> 01:01:11.120
I did that.

1779
01:01:11.198 --> 01:01:11.320
So,

1780
01:01:11.460 --> 01:01:11.722
for me,

1781
01:01:12.339 --> 01:01:14.124
it's a form of recovery in a way.

1782
01:01:15.503 --> 01:01:16.605
Yeah.

1783
01:01:16.606 --> 01:01:16.964
Wonderful.

1784
01:01:16.965 --> 01:01:18.308
You know,

1785
01:01:18.323 --> 01:01:21.573
rescuing others from the hole I dug myself and given out of,

1786
01:01:21.652 --> 01:01:21.847
right?

1787
01:01:21.894 --> 01:01:22.027
Like,

1788
01:01:22.028 --> 01:01:22.573
I love that,

1789
01:01:22.628 --> 01:01:22.894
right?

1790
01:01:22.895 --> 01:01:23.433
And I think that's,

1791
01:01:23.792 --> 01:01:24.714
I think it's our function.

1792
01:01:24.761 --> 01:01:25.980
I think our function is to,

1793
01:01:26.542 --> 01:01:27.277
I tell guys all the time,

1794
01:01:27.278 --> 01:01:27.417
like,

1795
01:01:27.433 --> 01:01:27.573
hey,

1796
01:01:27.574 --> 01:01:29.902
I want you where I am now 15 years faster.

1797
01:01:30.683 --> 01:01:33.558
I have this kind of theory called championing,

1798
01:01:33.855 --> 01:01:36.589
because you put an ING on the end of anything and it's the.

1799
01:01:36.808 --> 01:01:52.739
yeah it's a verb right so so for me as i've been around championship organizations have been a part of them there's kind of four qualities of championship organizations always have ones that are winning over and over again when i tell people there's passion talent precision and endurance the

1800
01:01:52.864 --> 01:02:01.130
higher up you go the less passion and talent matter it's not because they matter it's just everybody's got it like in the olympics everybody's got passion talent there's no difference

1801
01:02:01.692 --> 01:02:04.130
So what's left is precision and endurance.

1802
01:02:05.200 --> 01:02:07.341
I look at precision maybe differently than others.

1803
01:02:07.402 --> 01:02:07.642
For me,

1804
01:02:07.763 --> 01:02:09.384
precision isn't being right more.

1805
01:02:10.025 --> 01:02:11.025
It's being wrong less.

1806
01:02:12.126 --> 01:02:14.372
I think that's a more honest way to talk about.

1807
01:02:14.412 --> 01:02:15.247
Like being right more,

1808
01:02:15.271 --> 01:02:17.169
that's kind of an academic kind of lab mark.

1809
01:02:17.669 --> 01:02:18.490
Like wrong less,

1810
01:02:19.013 --> 01:02:21.951
it considers entropy and fatigue and chaos and all these other things.

1811
01:02:22.544 --> 01:02:22.857
But for me,

1812
01:02:22.904 --> 01:02:28.997
precision is being wrong less and endurance is being wrong less for longer than your competition.

1813
01:02:30.310 --> 01:02:31.419
So I hate it when they go,

1814
01:02:31.420 --> 01:02:32.872
he gets stronger as the game goes on.

1815
01:02:32.904 --> 01:02:33.044
Like,

1816
01:02:33.045 --> 01:02:33.169
no,

1817
01:02:33.170 --> 01:02:33.482
he doesn't.

1818
01:02:33.692 --> 01:02:34.593
No one gets stronger than .

1819
01:02:35.554 --> 01:02:37.376
You're seeing one who declines slower.

1820
01:02:38.558 --> 01:02:44.702
Usain Bolt gets fast slower than everybody else and gets slower than everybody else and that's why he wins,

1821
01:02:44.765 --> 01:02:45.007
right?

1822
01:02:45.804 --> 01:02:46.366
And so for me,

1823
01:02:48.804 --> 01:02:49.265
precision,

1824
01:02:49.929 --> 01:02:50.476
so how do you,

1825
01:02:51.257 --> 01:02:51.413
well,

1826
01:02:51.414 --> 01:02:52.366
you just make new mistakes.

1827
01:02:53.491 --> 01:02:54.913
Especially when you surround yourself with genius,

1828
01:02:54.960 --> 01:02:55.616
like in our community,

1829
01:02:55.679 --> 01:02:56.476
we're surrounded by genius.

1830
01:02:56.477 --> 01:02:56.616
Like,

1831
01:02:56.648 --> 01:02:57.757
all these guys are geniuses.

1832
01:02:57.758 --> 01:02:58.632
And when I go to the NFL,

1833
01:02:59.273 --> 01:03:00.538
all those guys are geniuses.

1834
01:03:00.663 --> 01:03:01.913
all of them are physical geniuses,

1835
01:03:02.085 --> 01:03:02.695
more of them are...

1836
01:03:03.084 --> 01:03:04.586
intellectual geniuses than they know.

1837
01:03:04.805 --> 01:03:09.811
When you look at the academic load of learning a playbook and triage and hiring to make a decision under pressure,

1838
01:03:09.812 --> 01:03:09.971
I mean,

1839
01:03:09.972 --> 01:03:11.413
the wiring for geniuses there,

1840
01:03:11.428 --> 01:03:13.975
especially with the complexity of some of these playbooks and stuff.

1841
01:03:13.991 --> 01:03:15.217
So all these guys are geniuses.

1842
01:03:15.756 --> 01:03:20.319
The worst thing you do to genius is stifle its creativity because genius innovates the game.

1843
01:03:21.397 --> 01:03:23.069
Genius is what involves and innovates.

1844
01:03:23.147 --> 01:03:24.913
And so if Barry Sanders is your running back,

1845
01:03:25.444 --> 01:03:26.100
you have two plays.

1846
01:03:26.366 --> 01:03:27.053
Barry run left,

1847
01:03:27.413 --> 01:03:28.131
Barry run right.

1848
01:03:28.256 --> 01:03:28.928
You just take notes.

1849
01:03:29.805 --> 01:03:30.106
Yeah.

1850
01:03:30.286 --> 01:03:31.487
And you see Barry do something like,

1851
01:03:31.528 --> 01:03:31.647
oh,

1852
01:03:31.648 --> 01:03:32.390
other people can do that.

1853
01:03:32.409 --> 01:03:33.030
That's a new play.

1854
01:03:33.550 --> 01:03:34.311
And then you see those like,

1855
01:03:34.374 --> 01:03:34.495
oh,

1856
01:03:34.496 --> 01:03:35.015
it's just Barry.

1857
01:03:35.315 --> 01:03:36.538
Only Barry can do that.

1858
01:03:36.539 --> 01:03:36.776
Right.

1859
01:03:36.777 --> 01:03:38.218
But Barry evolves the game.

1860
01:03:38.319 --> 01:03:38.601
Right.

1861
01:03:39.179 --> 01:03:40.163
And so I think as leaders,

1862
01:03:40.241 --> 01:03:41.147
we got to tell our people,

1863
01:03:41.288 --> 01:03:41.444
hey,

1864
01:03:41.468 --> 01:03:42.124
make new mistakes.

1865
01:03:42.125 --> 01:03:43.851
So when you're telling people to make new mistakes.

1866
01:03:44.573 --> 01:03:46.836
You're giving them permission to create and innovate and evolve.

1867
01:03:46.895 --> 01:03:47.096
Yeah,

1868
01:03:47.135 --> 01:03:47.676
take a risk.

1869
01:03:48.016 --> 01:03:49.438
But you're also demanding that they're a pro.

1870
01:03:49.578 --> 01:03:52.543
Because in order to make a mistake,

1871
01:03:52.700 --> 01:03:54.145
you've got to know everything about your old ones.

1872
01:03:55.043 --> 01:03:55.161
Right,

1873
01:03:55.162 --> 01:03:55.864
you're leveraging trust.

1874
01:03:55.865 --> 01:03:57.246
If you're going to make new mistakes,

1875
01:03:57.247 --> 01:03:59.145
you have to inventory your old ones.

1876
01:03:59.146 --> 01:04:00.864
You have to know them.

1877
01:04:00.895 --> 01:04:03.332
That's why the most important thing for us is that

1878
01:04:03.895 --> 01:04:04.332
AR.

1879
01:04:05.754 --> 01:04:06.567
You get off that bird,

1880
01:04:06.629 --> 01:04:06.832
man,

1881
01:04:06.879 --> 01:04:08.364
and you're downloading stuff,

1882
01:04:08.395 --> 01:04:10.036
but you're circling up,

1883
01:04:11.364 --> 01:04:11.864
three downs,

1884
01:04:11.926 --> 01:04:12.426
two ups.

1885
01:04:12.669 --> 01:04:15.390
you're learning from the last one because you don't have time to learn out there.

1886
01:04:15.550 --> 01:04:16.450
You can only learn here,

1887
01:04:17.109 --> 01:04:17.370
right?

1888
01:04:18.550 --> 01:04:19.351
The AARs,

1889
01:04:19.352 --> 01:04:20.491
the After I Turned Up the Port,

1890
01:04:20.589 --> 01:04:21.370
After I Turned Up the View,

1891
01:04:21.550 --> 01:04:22.011
debrief,

1892
01:04:22.034 --> 01:04:22.230
Facebook.

1893
01:04:22.231 --> 01:04:27.073
It's a chance to build that living library that allows me to remember what you had to learn the hard way,

1894
01:04:28.136 --> 01:04:28.292
right?

1895
01:04:28.293 --> 01:04:28.409
And,

1896
01:04:29.136 --> 01:04:29.792
you know,

1897
01:04:29.870 --> 01:04:31.308
rising tides raise all boats.

1898
01:04:31.355 --> 01:04:35.870
Like we get to create this collective reservoir of knowledge and all tap into it.

1899
01:04:35.948 --> 01:04:39.277
Because I may not have the margin to make it like you did,

1900
01:04:39.480 --> 01:04:39.730
right?

1901
01:04:40.073 --> 01:04:41.636
But now I learned what you had to learn the hard way.

1902
01:04:41.637 --> 01:04:42.355
I get to.

1903
01:04:42.577 --> 01:04:46.539
One of the greatest gifts you can give me is the chance to remember what you had to learn the hard way if I listen.

1904
01:04:47.844 --> 01:04:49.325
You can't control whether I listen or not.

1905
01:04:49.903 --> 01:04:51.727
That's every man's decision,

1906
01:04:51.766 --> 01:04:51.883
but

1907
01:04:52.844 --> 01:04:54.930
I can control whether or not you know or not.

1908
01:04:55.391 --> 01:04:56.813
You've got to decide whether or not you're going to listen.

1909
01:04:57.735 --> 01:05:01.461
And so I think that's where it comes down to the moral obligation we have for authenticity.

1910
01:05:03.024 --> 01:05:03.618
I find it funny,

1911
01:05:03.961 --> 01:05:08.789
kind of ironic that we're sitting five minutes from the Cowboys training facility and you used

1912
01:05:09.383 --> 01:05:10.289
Barry Sanders.

1913
01:05:10.352 --> 01:05:10.524
Yeah.

1914
01:05:11.037 --> 01:05:40.828
detroit lion yeah instead of emmett smith yeah yeah i think you might have well emmett would tell you barry sanders well no barry sanders he was a genius i mean yeah i can tell you emmett would be like barry right maybe like i mean yeah but same thing with emmett like you know you call 80 of a play and you just tell emmett to be brilliant with the rest of it right yeah right and there's some environments where that creative genius won't work and you look at john manziel like that that level of creative genius works in college in the nfl it doesn't work like because Because the...

1915
01:05:41.834 --> 01:05:43.073
You look at certain offenses,

1916
01:05:43.313 --> 01:05:44.754
there's a really great head coach,

1917
01:05:44.813 --> 01:05:46.172
and he went from college to NFL.

1918
01:05:46.614 --> 01:05:47.094
And I was like,

1919
01:05:47.114 --> 01:05:47.235
hey,

1920
01:05:47.236 --> 01:05:49.016
your offense isn't going to work in the NFL.

1921
01:05:49.055 --> 01:05:49.336
He's like,

1922
01:05:49.352 --> 01:05:49.555
why?

1923
01:05:50.235 --> 01:05:50.493
I'm like,

1924
01:05:50.516 --> 01:05:55.297
your offense is based on inducing mistakes and exploiting the time window in that mistake.

1925
01:05:56.922 --> 01:06:02.094
But your receivers in college got .35 seconds to get open.

1926
01:06:02.141 --> 01:06:02.672
In the NFL,

1927
01:06:02.704 --> 01:06:05.001
that's .15.

1928
01:06:05.016 --> 01:06:07.157
Because this guy can change directions so much faster.

1929
01:06:07.344 --> 01:06:09.219
So your quarterback doesn't have.

1930
01:06:10.757 --> 01:06:30.563
the the physics to throw a ball inside a 0.15 window right so the the the more the there's that's why creativity matters up to a point right and you know reduce you know make new mistakes and learn new ones and evolve constantly and and you can only do that when you ask questions right so does

1931
01:06:30.564 --> 01:06:37.281
that make sense yeah i feel like i'm on tangent highway right yeah oh yeah yeah sorry i took you down that no no you're good like i love this it's your show

1932
01:06:37.453 --> 01:06:37.573
Oh,

1933
01:06:37.653 --> 01:06:37.773
yeah.

1934
01:06:37.793 --> 01:06:38.875
So we're having fun with it.

1935
01:06:38.894 --> 01:06:40.877
Only I can make mistakes right now.

1936
01:06:40.878 --> 01:06:41.018
Yeah.

1937
01:06:41.498 --> 01:06:41.615
So,

1938
01:06:42.100 --> 01:06:42.318
you know,

1939
01:06:42.319 --> 01:06:44.982
we're talking about those pillars of being elite.

1940
01:06:45.041 --> 01:06:45.279
Yeah.

1941
01:06:45.280 --> 01:06:45.561
Balance,

1942
01:06:45.584 --> 01:06:45.943
curiosity,

1943
01:06:45.944 --> 01:06:46.420
capitalism,

1944
01:06:46.459 --> 01:06:46.982
intentionalism.

1945
01:06:47.123 --> 01:06:47.279
Yeah.

1946
01:06:47.342 --> 01:06:49.568
So we watched a pod with you recently.

1947
01:06:49.725 --> 01:06:51.248
I guess it probably wasn't too recent,

1948
01:06:51.350 --> 01:06:52.568
but the intentionalism,

1949
01:06:52.592 --> 01:06:53.670
I don't think was a piece of it.

1950
01:06:53.795 --> 01:06:55.248
It was originally four pillars.

1951
01:06:55.732 --> 01:06:56.217
Yeah.

1952
01:06:56.639 --> 01:06:56.748
Well,

1953
01:06:56.749 --> 01:06:57.498
it's always been there.

1954
01:06:57.514 --> 01:06:58.498
It's always been those five.

1955
01:06:58.499 --> 01:06:59.701
So maybe I just didn't talk about it.

1956
01:06:59.811 --> 01:07:00.092
All right.

1957
01:07:00.232 --> 01:07:00.357
Yeah.

1958
01:07:00.451 --> 01:07:01.514
Well,

1959
01:07:01.951 --> 01:07:03.826
you mentioned there the authenticity.

1960
01:07:03.873 --> 01:07:05.436
And then I think you said fear.

1961
01:07:06.217 --> 01:07:22.371
makes it vulnerability is did i pick no what i say is authenticity is what you call vulnerability when you're not scared anymore oh okay okay so it's again this is i'm from arkansas so i could be using several words wrong right yeah okay right that's what for me for me authenticity is you

1962
01:07:22.372 --> 01:07:32.621
know vulnerability feels vulnerable yeah yeah but when you crave authenticity and you know the advantage that comes with authenticity vulnerability doesn't

1963
01:07:32.989 --> 01:07:33.849
It's not scary anymore.

1964
01:07:33.850 --> 01:07:33.950
Well,

1965
01:07:33.951 --> 01:07:35.289
you have to lean into it in order to.

1966
01:07:35.350 --> 01:07:35.469
Yeah,

1967
01:07:35.549 --> 01:07:40.092
so that's why I say authenticity is what you call vulnerability when you're not scared anymore.

1968
01:07:40.112 --> 01:07:40.752
I like that.

1969
01:07:40.753 --> 01:07:41.952
It's because you're just so,

1970
01:07:42.873 --> 01:07:44.631
you understand the advantage of authenticity.

1971
01:07:44.632 --> 01:07:45.069
Exactly.

1972
01:07:45.616 --> 01:07:48.873
So the advantage trumps the apprehension.

1973
01:07:48.889 --> 01:07:49.545
Right,

1974
01:07:49.546 --> 01:07:49.936
right.

1975
01:07:49.937 --> 01:07:50.030
Well,

1976
01:07:50.031 --> 01:07:51.217
how do you get to that understanding?

1977
01:07:51.280 --> 01:07:52.717
Because so many people.

1978
01:07:53.077 --> 01:07:53.389
Reps,

1979
01:07:53.639 --> 01:07:54.170
reps and such.

1980
01:07:54.248 --> 01:07:55.295
It all comes down to reps,

1981
01:07:55.358 --> 01:07:55.592
man.

1982
01:07:55.889 --> 01:07:57.061
All it comes down to reps.

1983
01:07:57.202 --> 01:07:57.436
Yeah,

1984
01:07:57.748 --> 01:07:57.873
yeah.

1985
01:07:57.874 --> 01:07:59.248
You have to be encouraged too.

1986
01:07:59.280 --> 01:08:00.077
That's part of it too.

1987
01:08:00.295 --> 01:08:01.202
How do you get a pull-up?

1988
01:08:01.203 --> 01:08:01.702
It's like do pull-ups.

1989
01:08:03.281 --> 01:08:04.102
How do you get a run in?

1990
01:08:04.342 --> 01:08:04.701
You run.

1991
01:08:04.902 --> 01:08:06.264
One of our instructors one time,

1992
01:08:06.283 --> 01:08:06.444
man,

1993
01:08:07.002 --> 01:08:07.721
on a Friday,

1994
01:08:07.822 --> 01:08:08.123
he's like,

1995
01:08:08.182 --> 01:08:08.502
all right,

1996
01:08:08.541 --> 01:08:10.225
I know some of you guys are struggling with pull-ups.

1997
01:08:10.264 --> 01:08:11.686
Why don't you guys come in on Saturday?

1998
01:08:12.201 --> 01:08:14.240
Because you don't come in on the weekends and buds.

1999
01:08:14.881 --> 01:08:15.725
We come in on Saturday,

2000
01:08:15.740 --> 01:08:15.967
we're like,

2001
01:08:16.022 --> 01:08:16.147
oh,

2002
01:08:16.162 --> 01:08:16.303
man,

2003
01:08:16.326 --> 01:08:17.201
we're going to get all this.

2004
01:08:17.202 --> 01:08:18.178
We're going to get the gouge,

2005
01:08:18.179 --> 01:08:18.240
man.

2006
01:08:18.241 --> 01:08:20.037
We're going to get the gouge on how to do better pull-ups.

2007
01:08:20.038 --> 01:08:20.303
He's like,

2008
01:08:20.304 --> 01:08:20.569
all right,

2009
01:08:20.631 --> 01:08:21.069
mount the bar.

2010
01:08:21.662 --> 01:08:22.350
Do more pull-ups.

2011
01:08:22.351 --> 01:08:23.553
Exactly.

2012
01:08:23.850 --> 01:08:24.444
Exposure.

2013
01:08:24.631 --> 01:08:25.350
Newsflash.

2014
01:08:25.740 --> 01:08:26.319
Do the thing.

2015
01:08:26.381 --> 01:08:26.506
Oh,

2016
01:08:26.507 --> 01:08:26.647
man,

2017
01:08:26.662 --> 01:08:27.803
I was pissed.

2018
01:08:27.804 --> 01:08:28.850
There's an awesome

2019
01:08:29.944 --> 01:08:30.709
I'm a visual guy,

2020
01:08:30.710 --> 01:08:31.444
and that's why I love

2021
01:08:32.061 --> 01:08:48.867
books and movies and songs because these people know how to say things better than i do and i remember i was on deployment remember we're all reading gates of fire by stephen presley if you're an operator you read gates of fire right and you've given it away to a lot of people well i know i'm a player with him oh yeah earning pro yeah i mean the world

2022
01:08:48.868 --> 01:08:50.242
yeah he's incredible He's incredible.

2023
01:08:50.570 --> 01:08:50.758
Yeah.

2024
01:08:50.898 --> 01:08:51.039
But,

2025
01:08:51.711 --> 01:08:51.961
you know,

2026
01:08:52.102 --> 01:08:52.523
I remember.

2027
01:08:53.157 --> 01:08:56.780
We were deploying and we were in Diego Garcia because we were going for Pecum Sancom.

2028
01:08:57.522 --> 01:08:59.503
And I read the scene in

2029
01:09:00.245 --> 01:09:01.444
Gates of Fire where

2030
01:09:02.249 --> 01:09:02.804
Queen Gorgo,

2031
01:09:03.186 --> 01:09:03.905
Leonidas,

2032
01:09:04.085 --> 01:09:05.429
and Lady Parale were there.

2033
01:09:06.929 --> 01:09:07.069
And

2034
01:09:07.468 --> 01:09:10.030
King Leonidas articulates to the lady,

2035
01:09:10.358 --> 01:09:13.311
so he chose her husband and her son.

2036
01:09:14.030 --> 01:09:15.046
To be part of the 300.

2037
01:09:15.061 --> 01:09:16.796
And he pulled her aside to explain it to her.

2038
01:09:17.780 --> 01:09:19.764
And I get choked up when I think about this.

2039
01:09:20.327 --> 01:09:22.468
And I didn't know how to tell my bride.

2040
01:09:22.729 --> 01:09:23.530
how brave she was.

2041
01:09:24.110 --> 01:09:25.471
I didn't know how to say that.

2042
01:09:25.512 --> 01:09:25.753
I mean,

2043
01:09:26.835 --> 01:09:30.116
she has her child and I'm deploying and we know what I'm deploying into.

2044
01:09:30.198 --> 01:09:32.116
And I just marvel at her.

2045
01:09:32.499 --> 01:09:34.061
And in the scene,

2046
01:09:34.062 --> 01:09:34.585
he goes,

2047
01:09:34.624 --> 01:09:37.405
do you wonder why everyone fears the Spartans?

2048
01:09:38.303 --> 01:09:40.647
And his queen and Lady Paralate don't say anything.

2049
01:09:40.960 --> 01:09:43.553
Is it because we're the only professional soldiers?

2050
01:09:43.585 --> 01:09:44.647
And he goes,

2051
01:09:44.663 --> 01:09:45.413
it's not what it is.

2052
01:09:45.491 --> 01:09:47.194
It's because of our valor in combat.

2053
01:09:47.210 --> 01:09:47.553
And he goes,

2054
01:09:47.554 --> 01:09:48.116
it's not what it is.

2055
01:09:48.117 --> 01:09:48.678
He looks and he goes,

2056
01:09:49.319 --> 01:09:49.553
um

2057
01:09:51.009 --> 01:09:52.771
What makes Sparta different is our women.

2058
01:09:52.772 --> 01:09:54.873
Because when we fall,

2059
01:09:55.014 --> 01:09:56.416
all of Greece will look to our women.

2060
01:09:56.736 --> 01:09:57.775
And if our women stand,

2061
01:09:57.838 --> 01:09:58.576
Greece will stand.

2062
01:09:59.236 --> 01:09:59.994
And if our women fall,

2063
01:10:00.080 --> 01:10:00.697
Greece will fall.

2064
01:10:00.939 --> 01:10:03.283
It's the courage of our women that makes Spartan men great.

2065
01:10:04.205 --> 01:10:06.728
I read that to my wife because

2066
01:10:07.181 --> 01:10:07.588
I didn't know.

2067
01:10:08.603 --> 01:10:08.822
Obviously,

2068
01:10:08.823 --> 01:10:12.885
I've got to be around people who get what I don't know how to say until I've figured it out or I don't want to say it anymore.

2069
01:10:13.994 --> 01:10:14.244
And so,

2070
01:10:14.869 --> 01:10:15.119
you know,

2071
01:10:16.135 --> 01:10:16.447
there's a

2072
01:10:16.931 --> 01:10:17.963
Miles Teller's a really,

2073
01:10:17.978 --> 01:10:18.838
really gifted actor.

2074
01:10:20.161 --> 01:10:22.482
And there's a movie he's in where he talks.

2075
01:10:22.543 --> 01:10:25.326
It's a boxer who broke his neck and he came back.

2076
01:10:25.729 --> 01:10:29.010
It's a really great movie that I can't remember the name of right now.

2077
01:10:29.393 --> 01:10:33.057
But there's a scene where he's getting interviewed by a reporter.

2078
01:10:33.838 --> 01:10:36.416
And she talks about kind of how shady boxing is.

2079
01:10:36.557 --> 01:10:36.979
And he's like,

2080
01:10:36.994 --> 01:10:38.572
what's the biggest lie you were ever told?

2081
01:10:39.307 --> 01:10:39.697
And he goes,

2082
01:10:39.744 --> 01:10:40.541
it's not that simple.

2083
01:10:41.807 --> 01:10:42.182
And she goes,

2084
01:10:42.244 --> 01:10:43.025
why isn't it that simple?

2085
01:10:43.026 --> 01:10:43.291
And he goes,

2086
01:10:43.525 --> 01:10:43.650
no,

2087
01:10:43.744 --> 01:10:44.385
that's the lie.

2088
01:10:45.588 --> 01:10:48.229
The lie is it's not that simple when it is.

2089
01:10:49.089 --> 01:11:03.805
you just do the thing every the thing they're telling you not to do that's what you do you do the thing yeah you know how do you get more authentic you be authentic man like right you know in well i think you need to go through that the

2090
01:11:03.806 --> 01:11:18.117
authenticity can come with a lot of embarrassment a lot of like you need like you have that's part of the rep that's part of we had jocko on he was talking about exposure yeah you got to see your greatest fear and not watch it not happen like you hear rejection and so you share the thing you think someone's going to reject you

2091
01:11:18.733 --> 01:11:22.117
and they're still there.

2092
01:11:22.517 --> 01:11:23.617
Not only did not reject me,

2093
01:11:25.199 --> 01:11:29.160
like money's always been a little bit of a struggle for me because I didn't have it when I was growing up and

2094
01:11:29.605 --> 01:11:31.043
I watched it ruin a lot of people.

2095
01:11:31.910 --> 01:11:39.566
And I raised some capital when I first started my company and every guy that I had talked to,

2096
01:11:39.941 --> 01:11:40.707
they all looked at me and go,

2097
01:11:40.738 --> 01:11:40.847
hey,

2098
01:11:40.894 --> 01:11:42.035
I don't understand your business,

2099
01:11:42.036 --> 01:11:42.676
but I understand you,

2100
01:11:42.677 --> 01:11:43.441
I'm investing in you.

2101
01:11:44.176 --> 01:11:47.894
And every time I said that I had this impulse to share my personal finances.

2102
01:11:48.881 --> 01:11:49.321
And I was like,

2103
01:11:49.382 --> 01:11:49.982
don't do that.

2104
01:11:50.083 --> 01:11:50.222
Like,

2105
01:11:50.223 --> 01:11:51.825
they're going to reject you if they see that.

2106
01:11:51.826 --> 01:11:52.204
So I did.

2107
01:11:53.126 --> 01:11:54.829
And so it was about six months,

2108
01:11:55.188 --> 01:11:55.809
almost a year.

2109
01:11:56.770 --> 01:11:58.532
And I finally asked them all to go to breakfast.

2110
01:11:59.188 --> 01:12:01.790
And I laid these folders down on the table.

2111
01:12:01.930 --> 01:12:02.274
And they're like,

2112
01:12:02.275 --> 01:12:02.555
what's that?

2113
01:12:02.556 --> 01:12:02.774
I'm like,

2114
01:12:02.775 --> 01:12:04.376
that's my personal financial statement.

2115
01:12:05.040 --> 01:12:05.321
And they go,

2116
01:12:05.322 --> 01:12:06.305
why are you showing this to us?

2117
01:12:06.337 --> 01:12:06.680
I'm like,

2118
01:12:06.696 --> 01:12:06.915
well,

2119
01:12:07.915 --> 01:12:11.383
because everyone you said you're investing in me and not our company.

2120
01:12:11.821 --> 01:12:12.883
And when you said that,

2121
01:12:13.087 --> 01:12:14.540
I wanted to show you my finances.

2122
01:12:14.541 --> 01:12:17.977
But then I was scared because I thought we needed the capital.

2123
01:12:19.002 --> 01:12:19.262
And so,

2124
01:12:19.322 --> 01:12:23.906
but what it's done is it's kept me from asking you for your wisdom and your experience and insights.

2125
01:12:23.969 --> 01:12:24.086
And,

2126
01:12:24.847 --> 01:12:25.488
and I,

2127
01:12:25.910 --> 01:12:26.027
I,

2128
01:12:26.312 --> 01:12:28.328
I crave that more than anything else.

2129
01:12:28.672 --> 01:12:30.734
And I just don't like making decisions out of fear.

2130
01:12:30.797 --> 01:12:31.492
So here I am,

2131
01:12:32.258 --> 01:12:32.554
you know,

2132
01:12:32.555 --> 01:12:32.672
and,

2133
01:12:32.734 --> 01:12:35.437
and so they're all flipping through it and it was agonizing.

2134
01:12:35.578 --> 01:12:35.719
Like,

2135
01:12:35.720 --> 01:12:36.031
they're like,

2136
01:12:36.062 --> 01:12:36.484
they're like one.

2137
01:12:37.219 --> 01:12:38.203
I was like,

2138
01:12:38.328 --> 01:12:38.484
oh,

2139
01:12:39.375 --> 01:12:40.015
and we guys like,

2140
01:12:40.047 --> 01:12:40.687
what's the BAM?

2141
01:12:40.828 --> 01:12:42.140
Like the BAM is a big ass mistake.

2142
01:12:42.750 --> 01:12:43.484
The lesson of the big was,

2143
01:12:43.500 --> 01:12:45.203
is don't buy a big truck after a good month,

2144
01:12:45.234 --> 01:12:46.062
but after a good year.

2145
01:12:46.172 --> 01:12:46.703
So I just started.

2146
01:12:47.133 --> 01:12:53.519
atoning for these mistakes that I thought were catastrophic and horrific and no one ever made before in their lives.

2147
01:12:54.140 --> 01:12:58.187
And then one of them kind of looked at me and one of them sitting on the corner,

2148
01:12:58.188 --> 01:12:59.164
I can see it happening right now.

2149
01:12:59.187 --> 01:12:59.469
He goes,

2150
01:12:59.945 --> 01:13:00.187
he goes,

2151
01:13:00.226 --> 01:13:00.445
Clint,

2152
01:13:00.446 --> 01:13:01.226
I've,

2153
01:13:01.227 --> 01:13:03.515
I've invested in a lot of companies a lot.

2154
01:13:03.516 --> 01:13:03.734
He goes,

2155
01:13:03.797 --> 01:13:04.750
I own a lot of companies.

2156
01:13:05.312 --> 01:13:09.640
I've never had a CEO voluntarily show me his personal finances.

2157
01:13:10.203 --> 01:13:10.922
And the guy that goes,

2158
01:13:11.000 --> 01:13:12.453
especially something that looks like this.

2159
01:13:12.890 --> 01:13:13.500
Right,

2160
01:13:13.625 --> 01:13:13.859
right.

2161
01:13:14.449 --> 01:13:14.629
Like,

2162
01:13:14.910 --> 01:13:16.712
I'm not trying to set any records or anything here,

2163
01:13:16.751 --> 01:13:16.911
man,

2164
01:13:16.912 --> 01:13:17.032
but

2165
01:13:17.972 --> 01:13:20.874
I just don't want fear to be between you and me.

2166
01:13:21.194 --> 01:13:22.819
And then one of the other guys goes,

2167
01:13:23.499 --> 01:13:23.616
hey,

2168
01:13:23.655 --> 01:13:27.983
did I ever tell you about the time I lost $3 million of my boss's money?

2169
01:13:28.804 --> 01:13:30.022
And then around the table,

2170
01:13:30.327 --> 01:13:32.124
all those men started showing me.

2171
01:13:32.952 --> 01:13:34.765
And I just feel myself going like,

2172
01:13:34.936 --> 01:13:35.093
oh.

2173
01:13:35.890 --> 01:13:36.327
And they're like,

2174
01:13:36.858 --> 01:13:36.968
hey,

2175
01:13:37.327 --> 01:13:40.030
why would you think we were perfect in the first place,

2176
01:13:40.171 --> 01:13:40.515
right?

2177
01:13:41.140 --> 01:13:41.390
Right.

2178
01:13:41.391 --> 01:13:42.155
And none of them,

2179
01:13:42.311 --> 01:13:42.561
I mean,

2180
01:13:42.811 --> 01:13:43.843
all of them would have.

2181
01:13:45.017 --> 01:13:47.382
That wasn't a key to the conversation.

2182
01:13:47.421 --> 01:13:50.687
Like every one of those men is very free with their mistakes in the past.

2183
01:13:50.688 --> 01:13:51.187
It was me.

2184
01:13:52.011 --> 01:13:53.472
It was me getting out of my own way.

2185
01:13:53.636 --> 01:13:53.831
Right.

2186
01:13:55.439 --> 01:13:55.779
And,

2187
01:13:56.521 --> 01:13:58.782
you know,

2188
01:13:58.783 --> 01:14:00.923
knowing I'm surrounded by men that are men too,

2189
01:14:01.025 --> 01:14:01.364
man.

2190
01:14:01.403 --> 01:14:03.243
And it was a pivot point for me to.

2191
01:14:03.884 --> 01:14:04.767
And so the only,

2192
01:14:05.470 --> 01:14:05.985
I promise you,

2193
01:14:05.986 --> 01:14:06.189
I mean,

2194
01:14:06.251 --> 01:14:07.087
people who are watching this,

2195
01:14:07.150 --> 01:14:10.892
like there's something you want to tell someone you love because you think they're going to reject you.

2196
01:14:11.579 --> 01:14:13.157
And I can't say they won't.

2197
01:14:13.782 --> 01:14:14.751
But I will tell you,

2198
01:14:15.501 --> 01:14:16.814
if they're who you think they are,

2199
01:14:17.142 --> 01:14:17.501
they won't.

2200
01:14:19.267 --> 01:14:20.782
And you get to watch them prove it to you.

2201
01:14:22.106 --> 01:14:22.506
I mean,

2202
01:14:22.507 --> 01:14:23.407
you know what love is,

2203
01:14:23.487 --> 01:14:24.448
is being fully,

2204
01:14:24.928 --> 01:14:25.508
fully known.

2205
01:14:25.950 --> 01:14:26.270
Yeah,

2206
01:14:26.271 --> 01:14:27.192
you won't even be entertained.

2207
01:14:27.193 --> 01:14:29.211
You won't know if you're not authentic and vulnerable,

2208
01:14:29.313 --> 01:14:29.532
right?

2209
01:14:29.575 --> 01:14:30.458
And it's so much easier,

2210
01:14:30.497 --> 01:14:30.614
man.

2211
01:14:30.637 --> 01:14:30.856
I mean,

2212
01:14:30.895 --> 01:14:32.114
like authenticity is like,

2213
01:14:33.356 --> 01:14:33.598
you know,

2214
01:14:33.637 --> 01:14:34.622
some of the SED stuff,

2215
01:14:34.676 --> 01:14:34.918
you know,

2216
01:14:34.919 --> 01:14:35.598
and all that other stuff.

2217
01:14:35.637 --> 01:14:38.004
Like that full poly lifestyle,

2218
01:14:39.028 --> 01:14:40.387
when you're doing some of the intelligent stuff,

2219
01:14:40.418 --> 01:14:41.309
like it's exhausting.

2220
01:14:42.028 --> 01:14:43.543
You got to keep track of all the lies.

2221
01:14:44.387 --> 01:14:44.543
Yeah.

2222
01:14:44.793 --> 01:14:45.934
And that's like cardio.

2223
01:14:46.247 --> 01:14:47.497
And I don't like cardio.

2224
01:14:47.887 --> 01:14:48.168
Like so.

2225
01:14:48.682 --> 01:14:50.304
I'm not going to maintain it on the cover.

2226
01:14:50.323 --> 01:14:50.563
I'm like,

2227
01:14:50.564 --> 01:14:51.325
that's too hard.

2228
01:14:51.405 --> 01:14:51.866
What am I doing?

2229
01:14:51.944 --> 01:14:52.706
I just got the truth.

2230
01:14:52.707 --> 01:14:53.526
If you're going to reject me,

2231
01:14:53.546 --> 01:14:53.948
reject me.

2232
01:14:53.949 --> 01:14:54.065
Now,

2233
01:14:54.066 --> 01:14:54.929
I remember my bride,

2234
01:14:54.948 --> 01:14:55.147
man,

2235
01:14:55.190 --> 01:14:55.710
my bride,

2236
01:14:55.729 --> 01:14:55.851
we,

2237
01:14:56.729 --> 01:14:56.972
you know,

2238
01:14:58.128 --> 01:14:58.948
talk about authenticity,

2239
01:14:59.534 --> 01:15:00.651
of this T-shirt that says,

2240
01:15:00.776 --> 01:15:03.159
I beat anorexia because look at me.

2241
01:15:03.698 --> 01:15:03.878
And

2242
01:15:04.651 --> 01:15:06.292
I'm not trivialized.

2243
01:15:06.293 --> 01:15:06.714
Yeah,

2244
01:15:06.715 --> 01:15:06.839
no.

2245
01:15:07.479 --> 01:15:13.245
It's an ancient joke between my bride and I because my bride was at the University of Arkansas and I was playing in the Navy.

2246
01:15:13.542 --> 01:15:15.292
And my sister was at the University of Arkansas.

2247
01:15:15.890 --> 01:15:20.176
So I flew from Navy to Arkansas because I wanted to see my sister and meet her sorority sister.

2248
01:15:20.254 --> 01:15:22.176
So I just want to make sure they're good people because I care.

2249
01:15:22.696 --> 01:15:25.239
I care about my sister and I want to make sure all her friends are good people.

2250
01:15:26.278 --> 01:15:27.278
This is before you met her?

2251
01:15:27.325 --> 01:15:27.442
No,

2252
01:15:27.582 --> 01:15:28.786
this is when I met her.

2253
01:15:28.787 --> 01:15:29.606
This is when I met her.

2254
01:15:29.786 --> 01:15:30.004
Okay.

2255
01:15:30.247 --> 01:15:30.661
And man,

2256
01:15:30.684 --> 01:15:33.223
I was done the minute I was like,

2257
01:15:33.224 --> 01:15:33.332
hey,

2258
01:15:33.333 --> 01:15:33.942
you want to get married?

2259
01:15:33.973 --> 01:15:34.254
She's like,

2260
01:15:34.270 --> 01:15:34.942
can we go on a date?

2261
01:15:34.973 --> 01:15:35.207
I'm like,

2262
01:15:35.286 --> 01:15:35.551
sure.

2263
01:15:36.989 --> 01:15:37.864
Amazing.

2264
01:15:39.489 --> 01:15:40.754
So we went on a date and it was like,

2265
01:15:41.395 --> 01:15:43.129
we went to Olive Garden.

2266
01:15:43.254 --> 01:15:44.254
and a webbing I

2267
01:15:44.494 --> 01:16:00.211
can you breadsticks night like you know that one yeah oh yeah you fill up on president's right you're full you want to get some yogurt you do the whole date like 12 bucks it wasn't bread six nine she was she was grilled chicken caesar salad and she was just kind of picking at it and i come from a family where you eat what you order yep

2268
01:16:00.312 --> 01:16:03.508
i was sitting there watching her and i was like i was having this internal dialogue

2269
01:16:04.446 --> 01:16:05.306
And this guy's like saying,

2270
01:16:05.326 --> 01:16:05.487
like,

2271
01:16:05.527 --> 01:16:06.126
don't say anything,

2272
01:16:06.166 --> 01:16:06.707
don't say anything,

2273
01:16:06.787 --> 01:16:07.407
don't say anything.

2274
01:16:07.567 --> 01:16:08.627
But I was born in Arkansas.

2275
01:16:08.647 --> 01:16:09.108
This guy's like,

2276
01:16:09.147 --> 01:16:09.287
yeah,

2277
01:16:09.307 --> 01:16:09.467
man,

2278
01:16:09.506 --> 01:16:09.967
throw it out there,

2279
01:16:09.987 --> 01:16:10.147
buddy.

2280
01:16:10.205 --> 01:16:10.826
See what happens,

2281
01:16:10.908 --> 01:16:11.108
right?

2282
01:16:11.787 --> 01:16:13.987
So I remember just turning and looking at her and just going,

2283
01:16:14.026 --> 01:16:14.190
hey,

2284
01:16:14.987 --> 01:16:16.065
I really like you.

2285
01:16:16.869 --> 01:16:18.291
And I think you could really like me.

2286
01:16:19.127 --> 01:16:20.768
And I think we'd have something amazing here.

2287
01:16:21.455 --> 01:16:22.846
But if you don't strap on the feedback,

2288
01:16:22.877 --> 01:16:23.737
we're going to have some issues.

2289
01:16:23.738 --> 01:16:25.065
That was $9.89.

2290
01:16:25.066 --> 01:16:26.252
I'm not taking a salad home with my,

2291
01:16:26.596 --> 01:16:27.877
I went this whole rant.

2292
01:16:27.971 --> 01:16:28.455
What'd you order?

2293
01:16:28.846 --> 01:16:32.346
What I didn't know at the time is my bride was knee deep in the throes of an erection.

2294
01:16:33.158 --> 01:16:33.299
Man,

2295
01:16:33.330 --> 01:16:33.877
it had her.

2296
01:16:34.238 --> 01:16:34.498
And it's,

2297
01:16:34.598 --> 01:16:37.242
and it's hooks and claws are deep and she just kind of bought it.

2298
01:16:37.261 --> 01:16:40.325
And everyone in her life loved her was just young.

2299
01:16:40.443 --> 01:16:40.603
Like,

2300
01:16:40.646 --> 01:16:40.763
no,

2301
01:16:41.204 --> 01:16:41.685
just be you.

2302
01:16:41.845 --> 01:16:42.724
You're beautiful.

2303
01:16:42.786 --> 01:16:43.771
And I didn't cure her,

2304
01:16:44.529 --> 01:16:47.771
but I'm part of the choir and I did not save her,

2305
01:16:47.772 --> 01:16:48.810
but I'm part of the symphony.

2306
01:16:48.833 --> 01:16:50.560
And here's why that's so important to me.

2307
01:16:50.561 --> 01:16:51.560
I've got three daughters.

2308
01:16:51.935 --> 01:16:52.138
Yeah.

2309
01:16:52.279 --> 01:16:52.857
And if anything,

2310
01:16:53.013 --> 01:16:53.138
the,

2311
01:16:53.294 --> 01:16:53.419
the,

2312
01:16:53.904 --> 01:16:56.216
the world's harder now than it was then the pressures,

2313
01:16:56.294 --> 01:17:00.357
my daughters to look and be and do are extraordinary.

2314
01:17:02.402 --> 01:17:03.223
In eating the sword,

2315
01:17:03.383 --> 01:17:05.925
the numbers tell me an eating sword is going to come to my house,

2316
01:17:06.165 --> 01:17:07.728
either on my girls or one of their friends.

2317
01:17:08.208 --> 01:17:10.513
And I'm okay with it because I know what my bride's going to do.

2318
01:17:11.411 --> 01:17:12.115
My bride's going to go,

2319
01:17:12.130 --> 01:17:12.255
hey,

2320
01:17:12.271 --> 01:17:12.411
babe,

2321
01:17:12.412 --> 01:17:13.513
I'm going to go talk to the girls.

2322
01:17:13.896 --> 01:17:14.193
And I'll go,

2323
01:17:14.194 --> 01:17:14.833
do you want me to come?

2324
01:17:14.896 --> 01:17:15.177
She'll go,

2325
01:17:15.216 --> 01:17:15.333
no,

2326
01:17:15.372 --> 01:17:15.677
I'll go.

2327
01:17:16.357 --> 01:17:18.536
And she'll roll up her sleeves and she will share her scars.

2328
01:17:18.802 --> 01:17:19.474
And she will say to them,

2329
01:17:19.583 --> 01:17:20.036
such pain.

2330
01:17:20.052 --> 01:17:22.927
Because that's what you do when you're brave.

2331
01:17:23.568 --> 01:17:23.786
And.

2332
01:17:24.914 --> 01:17:27.257
So I live with an authentic,

2333
01:17:27.456 --> 01:17:28.458
courageous woman.

2334
01:17:28.997 --> 01:17:29.720
And because I do,

2335
01:17:30.138 --> 01:17:30.860
I've got authentic,

2336
01:17:30.899 --> 01:17:31.821
courageous girls,

2337
01:17:31.899 --> 01:17:32.181
right?

2338
01:17:32.263 --> 01:17:32.802
Right.

2339
01:17:32.803 --> 01:17:32.903
Well,

2340
01:17:32.904 --> 01:17:34.044
they've all got authentic,

2341
01:17:34.122 --> 01:17:37.146
courageous dad.

2342
01:17:37.310 --> 01:17:37.427
Right,

2343
01:17:37.428 --> 01:17:37.544
right.

2344
01:17:37.545 --> 01:17:38.146
And you live it.

2345
01:17:38.325 --> 01:17:38.591
You know,

2346
01:17:39.310 --> 01:17:43.450
one of the gifts I've always tried to give my daughters is let them know their dad's not perfect,

2347
01:17:43.528 --> 01:17:43.825
right?

2348
01:17:44.794 --> 01:17:47.341
And because my dad died when I was young,

2349
01:17:48.122 --> 01:17:49.497
and then I made him perfect,

2350
01:17:49.700 --> 01:17:50.544
and then I chased him.

2351
01:17:51.497 --> 01:17:51.638
Oh,

2352
01:17:51.639 --> 01:17:51.857
wow.

2353
01:17:52.662 --> 01:18:08.235
you didn't talk about setting yourself up for failure right so i deified this this dad that i loved and i missed and i was trying to make proud and and you know if my i'm not convinced anybody in heaven cares

2354
01:18:08.259 --> 01:18:19.704
what's happening down here you know how great heaven is but if my my dad would leave me like who are you chasing yeah like who was that's not me and i'll tell you one of the greatest gifts i was ever given is some of my dad's friends pulled me aside

2355
01:18:21.334 --> 01:18:21.694
And he goes,

2356
01:18:21.695 --> 01:18:21.815
hey,

2357
01:18:21.975 --> 01:18:22.115
man,

2358
01:18:22.135 --> 01:18:22.996
we love and miss your dad.

2359
01:18:23.055 --> 01:18:25.379
This was probably 15 years after my dad died.

2360
01:18:26.180 --> 01:18:26.680
And they're like,

2361
01:18:26.821 --> 01:18:26.981
listen,

2362
01:18:27.001 --> 01:18:27.602
we love your dad.

2363
01:18:27.603 --> 01:18:28.243
We miss him too.

2364
01:18:28.321 --> 01:18:29.665
But who do you think your dad was?

2365
01:18:29.860 --> 01:18:30.907
And I listed all these things.

2366
01:18:30.962 --> 01:18:31.743
My dad was.

2367
01:18:31.985 --> 01:18:32.704
Yeah,

2368
01:18:32.705 --> 01:18:33.149
he was.

2369
01:18:34.329 --> 01:18:35.227
But he was also this.

2370
01:18:36.149 --> 01:18:38.274
And they introduced me to the humanity,

2371
01:18:41.055 --> 01:18:41.993
the fallibility,

2372
01:18:42.868 --> 01:18:44.493
and made my dad human.

2373
01:18:44.790 --> 01:18:45.055
Right.

2374
01:18:45.837 --> 01:18:47.024
And they were like,

2375
01:18:47.055 --> 01:18:47.258
listen,

2376
01:18:47.352 --> 01:18:48.540
we're a little bit nervous because,

2377
01:18:48.821 --> 01:18:50.055
you know.

2378
01:18:50.782 --> 01:19:06.479
violent guy like we're not we love your dad but we're gonna tell you your dad really was because we can see what you're doing now you're you're you're vilifying yourself as a as a dad and you're comparing yourself to your dad but you know but

2379
01:19:06.541 --> 01:19:17.823
this whole thing is like i always i always tell my girls like if you're gonna compare anything for everything if you're gonna compare the house compare the love this marriage if you're gonna compare the car compare the hole in the heart

2380
01:19:18.590 --> 01:19:37.849
that a car will never feel right so you know so i just kind of chase pace and pull kind of theory of my deals like who you're chasing and what's life going to look like when you catch them right and then keep pace with people that are going to they're going to hold you accountable they're going to leave you behind if you don't do the work and you got to pull someone behind you or

2381
01:19:37.865 --> 01:19:47.256
you'll be doing the thing longer than you want to or longer than you're good at it and both of us both of them are a disservice to the thing right yeah and um that's what i love about our community man like

2382
01:19:47.410 --> 01:20:04.546
in our community like do your job we're not gonna wait on you to get better like you got it and so there's this kind of self-policing there's this kind of collective desire to get great right and you know so to bring it all back to the high ground it

2383
01:20:04.921 --> 01:20:11.531
you know for me it it took me longer than it should have i remember i was down in my office i'd love for y'all to come down sometime but we have a

2384
01:20:12.002 --> 01:20:13.483
We have a shoot house in our office at

2385
01:20:13.944 --> 01:20:14.845
Simmon Houston's facility.

2386
01:20:15.286 --> 01:20:17.669
My bride calls my office the Arnold Loft Boys.

2387
01:20:18.407 --> 01:20:18.650
I'm like,

2388
01:20:18.651 --> 01:20:18.970
what are you doing?

2389
01:20:18.971 --> 01:20:19.290
What do you mean?

2390
01:20:19.310 --> 01:20:19.548
She goes,

2391
01:20:19.610 --> 01:20:19.829
listen,

2392
01:20:19.849 --> 01:20:24.173
I have a 14-year-old who's in our office waiting for their mom to come pick them up from football practice.

2393
01:20:24.174 --> 01:20:25.157
They would look at your office.

2394
01:20:25.298 --> 01:20:25.657
And I'm like,

2395
01:20:25.939 --> 01:20:26.939
so we have a shoot house.

2396
01:20:26.940 --> 01:20:27.915
We have climbing walls.

2397
01:20:27.916 --> 01:20:28.603
We have a gym.

2398
01:20:28.618 --> 01:20:30.103
We have a shower that can chip paint.

2399
01:20:30.118 --> 01:20:30.337
I mean,

2400
01:20:30.338 --> 01:20:31.618
we got to.

2401
01:20:31.619 --> 01:20:32.087
And I was like,

2402
01:20:32.088 --> 01:20:32.384
yeah,

2403
01:20:32.385 --> 01:20:32.540
well,

2404
01:20:32.541 --> 01:20:34.150
your office would be pretty small.

2405
01:20:34.196 --> 01:20:34.712
She's right.

2406
01:20:34.728 --> 01:20:34.884
Like,

2407
01:20:34.885 --> 01:20:36.087
you know what I mean?

2408
01:20:36.259 --> 01:20:36.743
And she's like,

2409
01:20:36.759 --> 01:20:38.181
you're like the world's biggest.

2410
01:20:38.603 --> 01:20:40.337
You're a 51-year-old nine-year-old.

2411
01:20:40.338 --> 01:20:40.775
I'm like,

2412
01:20:40.776 --> 01:20:41.150
You are.

2413
01:20:41.899 --> 01:20:43.421
That's what we're doing inside ourselves.

2414
01:20:43.479 --> 01:20:44.522
Super mature response.

2415
01:20:44.622 --> 01:20:44.981
I know you,

2416
01:20:45.022 --> 01:20:45.323
everyone.

2417
01:20:45.440 --> 01:20:47.444
And,

2418
01:20:48.604 --> 01:20:48.846
you know,

2419
01:20:49.565 --> 01:20:50.846
the way you always get to the high ground,

2420
01:20:50.948 --> 01:20:52.550
I was just having a really hard day.

2421
01:20:52.870 --> 01:20:56.753
And the way I see it is there's a difference between being here and being home.

2422
01:20:57.589 --> 01:20:58.229
Here's geography,

2423
01:20:58.339 --> 01:20:59.276
home is knowing why you're here.

2424
01:20:59.979 --> 01:21:02.479
That's why so many of us can feel more at home over there than here.

2425
01:21:03.807 --> 01:21:04.073
And

2426
01:21:04.761 --> 01:21:06.120
I remember being down at the office,

2427
01:21:06.698 --> 01:21:10.432
and I was just coming to grips with just how

2428
01:21:11.266 --> 01:21:11.386
how

2429
01:21:11.746 --> 01:21:14.387
I was with the husband and daddy and friend and boss,

2430
01:21:14.508 --> 01:21:15.586
teammate that I wanted to be.

2431
01:21:15.726 --> 01:21:15.848
And

2432
01:21:16.508 --> 01:21:17.648
I kind of came to it because like,

2433
01:21:17.668 --> 01:21:18.129
I'm here,

2434
01:21:18.130 --> 01:21:18.988
but I'm not home.

2435
01:21:19.988 --> 01:21:20.910
And so I was looking at the,

2436
01:21:21.309 --> 01:21:23.473
the door three to our shoot house.

2437
01:21:23.474 --> 01:21:23.590
And,

2438
01:21:24.371 --> 01:21:25.129
and I'm a visual guy.

2439
01:21:25.130 --> 01:21:25.387
I'm like,

2440
01:21:25.426 --> 01:21:25.668
okay,

2441
01:21:25.848 --> 01:21:26.707
everyone I love,

2442
01:21:26.730 --> 01:21:30.543
everyone that needs me is home and home was on the other side of the door.

2443
01:21:30.544 --> 01:21:31.152
And I'm here.

2444
01:21:31.871 --> 01:21:32.996
So how do I get through that door?

2445
01:21:33.793 --> 01:21:34.059
And then

2446
01:21:34.965 --> 01:21:36.074
C4. C4 is amazing,

2447
01:21:36.090 --> 01:21:36.309
man.

2448
01:21:36.310 --> 01:21:36.387
C4,

2449
01:21:36.418 --> 01:21:37.434
you can cook with it.

2450
01:21:38.027 --> 01:21:39.574
You can blow stuff up with the C4 is incredible.

2451
01:21:40.078 --> 01:21:40.419
But for me,

2452
01:21:40.420 --> 01:21:41.620
C4 became an acrostic.

2453
01:21:41.640 --> 01:21:42.541
I think that's what you call it.

2454
01:21:43.002 --> 01:21:43.361
And for me,

2455
01:21:43.422 --> 01:21:45.984
C4 instantly became career,

2456
01:21:46.066 --> 01:21:46.484
compete,

2457
01:21:46.523 --> 01:21:47.125
contribute,

2458
01:21:47.863 --> 01:21:48.668
and catalyst.

2459
01:21:49.629 --> 01:21:51.113
And what I realized in that moment,

2460
01:21:51.114 --> 01:21:52.293
and this all happened really quickly.

2461
01:21:52.332 --> 01:21:55.972
I think it was the culmination of some deep dives and conversations or whatever.

2462
01:21:56.847 --> 01:21:59.863
What I realized in my mid-30s was my career,

2463
01:22:00.504 --> 01:22:01.832
while I was on the ball field and the battlefield,

2464
01:22:02.254 --> 01:22:02.847
was competing,

2465
01:22:02.863 --> 01:22:03.394
contributing,

2466
01:22:03.707 --> 01:22:04.519
and catalyst.

2467
01:22:05.410 --> 01:22:05.941
So all of a sudden,

2468
01:22:05.942 --> 01:22:07.019
I was- Many of us are victims of that.

2469
01:22:07.129 --> 01:22:08.707
I was burdening the boardroom.

2470
01:22:09.118 --> 01:22:12.221
with providing the satisfaction that only all four of those things could do,

2471
01:22:12.502 --> 01:22:12.782
right?

2472
01:22:13.401 --> 01:22:13.522
So,

2473
01:22:13.580 --> 01:22:14.862
I've got about 18 months,

2474
01:22:14.885 --> 01:22:17.026
almost two years of a daily checklist that was C,

2475
01:22:17.166 --> 01:22:17.284
C,

2476
01:22:17.448 --> 01:22:17.565
C,

2477
01:22:17.690 --> 01:22:17.807
C.

2478
01:22:18.745 --> 01:22:18.870
Hey,

2479
01:22:19.026 --> 01:22:19.385
career.

2480
01:22:19.588 --> 01:22:22.034
And it's ones and zeros because I'm either too harsh or too generous.

2481
01:22:22.035 --> 01:22:22.932
There's no letter grade.

2482
01:22:23.651 --> 01:22:23.776
Hey,

2483
01:22:23.815 --> 01:22:24.034
career,

2484
01:22:24.049 --> 01:22:24.752
did I go to work?

2485
01:22:24.877 --> 01:22:26.034
Just can't have a good day unless you go,

2486
01:22:26.080 --> 01:22:26.330
right?

2487
01:22:26.549 --> 01:22:27.034
One or zero.

2488
01:22:27.080 --> 01:22:27.752
Hey,

2489
01:22:27.784 --> 01:22:30.424
did I compete in something or did I train to compete in something?

2490
01:22:30.846 --> 01:22:31.955
One,

2491
01:22:32.018 --> 01:22:32.221
zero.

2492
01:22:32.315 --> 01:22:33.659
Did I help someone that can't help me?

2493
01:22:34.096 --> 01:22:36.768
Think there's a hole in our soul that can only be filled by service to others?

2494
01:22:37.159 --> 01:22:38.065
That's contribution.

2495
01:22:38.502 --> 01:22:39.243
that I get better.

2496
01:22:40.184 --> 01:22:40.303
And

2497
01:22:41.225 --> 01:22:41.505
I mean,

2498
01:22:42.046 --> 01:22:42.526
and I've got,

2499
01:22:43.268 --> 01:22:47.268
I don't know how many four check days I had,

2500
01:22:48.190 --> 01:22:50.096
but I had a lot of twos and a lot of threes.

2501
01:22:50.815 --> 01:22:52.096
And our feelings are real,

2502
01:22:52.135 --> 01:22:53.300
but they respect facts.

2503
01:22:54.018 --> 01:22:55.221
And what that C4 became,

2504
01:22:55.237 --> 01:22:58.581
it became my instrument panel when I was in that fog bank.

2505
01:22:58.721 --> 01:22:59.237
And I was like,

2506
01:22:59.238 --> 01:23:00.768
where I could orient and understand.

2507
01:23:00.769 --> 01:23:01.003
I was like,

2508
01:23:01.050 --> 01:23:01.268
okay,

2509
01:23:01.378 --> 01:23:01.940
I went to work.

2510
01:23:02.206 --> 01:23:02.768
I trained,

2511
01:23:03.065 --> 01:23:04.784
helped somebody and I got better.

2512
01:23:05.753 --> 01:23:06.846
And all of a sudden I could feel my

2513
01:23:07.054 --> 01:23:22.701
brain going okay you're not lost you might be wrong but you're not lost and that's my biggest thing is like don't be lost don't be lost and sometimes you're not even wrong you're just early but don't be lost yeah and so for me those maps have always that

2514
01:23:22.755 --> 01:23:35.037
that c4 that come all that's kind of a thing that's you know come all the way home and everybody that's not unique to the veteran experience like all of us all of us wonder who we are sometimes oh yeah and my deal is like you know

2515
01:23:36.743 --> 01:23:37.264
There's some,

2516
01:23:37.905 --> 01:23:38.226
I think,

2517
01:23:38.645 --> 01:23:38.987
like I said,

2518
01:23:39.727 --> 01:23:40.450
feelings are real,

2519
01:23:40.451 --> 01:23:41.513
but they respect facts.

2520
01:23:41.712 --> 01:23:44.395
And what I realized I was doing is I was,

2521
01:23:44.739 --> 01:23:44.974
you know,

2522
01:23:44.975 --> 01:23:45.560
the amygdala,

2523
01:23:45.561 --> 01:23:46.919
the monkey brain is just going to take over.

2524
01:23:47.364 --> 01:23:48.622
Like if it thinks it's not going to be like you.

2525
01:23:48.623 --> 01:23:48.927
Anytime,

2526
01:23:48.981 --> 01:23:49.302
anytime.

2527
01:23:49.325 --> 01:23:50.364
And all of a sudden I would see that.

2528
01:23:50.892 --> 01:24:10.051
career could be true catalyst and monkey brain like all right cool yeah we're not lost because all monkey brain really cares about is whether you're lost or not because lost equals dead and if it knows you're not lost then it'll let you live a little bit and so finding just a four instrument panel that let me know i wasn't lost that's when i started coming home and

2529
01:24:10.052 --> 01:24:18.598
trying to help other guys have their version of that as quickly as i can and that and that's what i say you know my you know and it would help me like i would

2530
01:24:19.296 --> 01:24:20.457
pull up in front of the house and

2531
01:24:20.997 --> 01:24:22.700
I'd look at my CCC like,

2532
01:24:22.759 --> 01:24:22.960
okay,

2533
01:24:23.341 --> 01:24:23.821
went to work,

2534
01:24:23.982 --> 01:24:24.443
trained,

2535
01:24:25.841 --> 01:24:26.321
help someone,

2536
01:24:26.364 --> 01:24:26.962
didn't get better.

2537
01:24:27.204 --> 01:24:29.786
I'm talking about the physiology of getting better,

2538
01:24:29.825 --> 01:24:30.771
like learning a new skill,

2539
01:24:30.864 --> 01:24:31.568
playing the banjo,

2540
01:24:32.372 --> 01:24:33.107
right and left handed.

2541
01:24:33.388 --> 01:24:36.013
There's stuff that happens in our brain when we're trying to learn a new thing.

2542
01:24:37.982 --> 01:24:39.700
And so that's not the moral get better,

2543
01:24:39.779 --> 01:24:41.841
it's like literally gain a new skill,

2544
01:24:42.841 --> 01:24:43.935
right with your left hand,

2545
01:24:44.857 --> 01:24:45.560
all those things.

2546
01:24:46.263 --> 01:24:48.607
There's some physiology that comes with doing something like that.

2547
01:24:49.216 --> 01:25:06.698
and i'd pull up and i remember very vividly at a really hard day at work and i pulled up in front of the house and this was when i was really trying to beat drinking um because i struggled with drinking for a long time which is kind of shocking to a lot of people because i never drank when i first

2548
01:25:06.730 --> 01:25:08.558
beer ever had was i was 29.

2549
01:25:08.589 --> 01:25:16.870
i just never because i didn't have the margin like i couldn't yeah like one i wanted to be a good role model but two i was like i can't i don't have the margin

2550
01:25:18.140 --> 01:25:33.727
drink and still perform at a high level right so it's practical as much as it was you know wouldn't be a good role model right and but for me and then also had evidence like i could see a trend and i was like oh hey that's

2551
01:25:33.867 --> 01:25:47.422
eight days in a row that i've gone to work worked out uh and so there's something about facts and facts can be relative as long as they matter to us right right right and so for me it all comes down to like just don't be lost man

2552
01:25:47.828 --> 01:26:04.603
don't be lost be wrong and a lot of times if you're wrong you're not even wrong you're just early but don't be lost yeah that's what i feel about my faith i tell people like man if you want to go from lost being wrong you pick up that bible like is a it's a map written for you by a creator that wants you home again right

2553
01:26:04.619 --> 01:26:11.697
that's all it is and it's just bringing you back home it's a love letter that'll lead you back home and it's written to you by an all-knowing

2554
01:26:13.344 --> 01:26:29.280
creator that loves you and he just wants you to come back home right and i said i told men like this is this is my faith like man i'll tell you what to do i'm just telling you what helped me is like you pick up that bible and you read it like as a letter leading you back home and you can go from lost to being wrong like that and

2555
01:26:29.358 --> 01:26:41.952
in the fastest way to go from lost to being wrong in addition to that is you surround yourself with guys you know what it's like to be you they can continues like hey man you're not lost you just believe like so john says

2556
01:26:42.476 --> 01:26:43.137
Now if you're lost,

2557
01:26:43.197 --> 01:26:43.557
John's like,

2558
01:26:43.558 --> 01:26:44.118
you're not lost.

2559
01:26:44.217 --> 01:26:45.319
Then I'm in a decision where I go,

2560
01:26:45.418 --> 01:26:45.620
okay,

2561
01:26:45.659 --> 01:26:47.600
he's a liar or he's right.

2562
01:26:48.002 --> 01:26:48.881
Which one's more probable?

2563
01:26:49.061 --> 01:26:49.182
Well,

2564
01:26:49.183 --> 01:26:50.022
I know he's not a liar,

2565
01:26:51.249 --> 01:26:52.006
so he must be right.

2566
01:26:52.905 --> 01:26:53.788
So I'm not lost.

2567
01:26:54.350 --> 01:26:55.108
Now maybe I'm wrong.

2568
01:26:55.170 --> 01:26:56.374
That's a second conversation.

2569
01:26:57.350 --> 01:26:59.374
But that's why we're supposed to run with each other.

2570
01:26:59.749 --> 01:27:00.077
I mean,

2571
01:27:00.078 --> 01:27:00.514
I feel lost.

2572
01:27:00.515 --> 01:27:00.608
Hey,

2573
01:27:00.609 --> 01:27:00.889
you're not.

2574
01:27:00.936 --> 01:27:01.561
You're on the phone with me.

2575
01:27:03.077 --> 01:27:05.264
The fact that you're on the phone with anybody means you're not lost.

2576
01:27:05.311 --> 01:27:06.045
Or I'm lost too,

2577
01:27:06.077 --> 01:27:06.858
and I'm not lost.

2578
01:27:08.264 --> 01:27:08.374
Yeah.

2579
01:27:08.375 --> 01:27:08.483
I mean,

2580
01:27:08.484 --> 01:27:09.202
if it's land nav,

2581
01:27:09.203 --> 01:27:09.686
I might be.

2582
01:27:10.311 --> 01:27:10.717
or my bad

2583
01:27:10.888 --> 01:27:11.208
It's like,

2584
01:27:11.288 --> 01:27:12.470
officers are famous for being lost.

2585
01:27:12.790 --> 01:27:12.911
Like,

2586
01:27:13.270 --> 01:27:14.532
John and I had just been lost together.

2587
01:27:14.612 --> 01:27:16.712
Had to find some E4 come and save us.

2588
01:27:16.774 --> 01:27:16.973
Like,

2589
01:27:17.395 --> 01:27:18.856
they found a golf course again.

2590
01:27:18.899 --> 01:27:19.618
Steve Osborne.

2591
01:27:19.619 --> 01:27:20.595
I don't know what happened,

2592
01:27:20.618 --> 01:27:20.735
right?

2593
01:27:20.759 --> 01:27:21.720
Steve Osborne was my friend,

2594
01:27:21.721 --> 01:27:21.915
man.

2595
01:27:22.079 --> 01:27:23.196
That guy saved me more times.

2596
01:27:23.197 --> 01:27:23.321
Dude,

2597
01:27:23.501 --> 01:27:23.798
Wyme.

2598
01:27:24.024 --> 01:27:24.501
Wyme would be like,

2599
01:27:24.502 --> 01:27:24.618
hey,

2600
01:27:24.681 --> 01:27:24.860
sir.

2601
01:27:25.626 --> 01:27:26.165
Wyme and Fro.

2602
01:27:26.166 --> 01:27:27.712
I had two amazing point guys.

2603
01:27:28.384 --> 01:27:29.212
Those dudes could make,

2604
01:27:29.446 --> 01:27:31.634
Wyme can make sir sound like the dirtiest word on the planet.

2605
01:27:31.635 --> 01:27:32.087
Hey,

2606
01:27:32.290 --> 01:27:32.556
sir.

2607
01:27:33.493 --> 01:27:33.634
Like,

2608
01:27:33.635 --> 01:27:34.446
you just called me an asshole?

2609
01:27:34.509 --> 01:27:34.649
Like,

2610
01:27:34.650 --> 01:27:34.774
no,

2611
01:27:34.775 --> 01:27:35.024
I said,

2612
01:27:35.071 --> 01:27:35.196
sir.

2613
01:27:35.197 --> 01:27:35.446
I'm like,

2614
01:27:35.477 --> 01:27:36.337
you an asshole.

2615
01:27:36.338 --> 01:27:36.899
Oh my god.

2616
01:27:37.445 --> 01:27:39.005
I know what that's like.

2617
01:27:39.966 --> 01:27:40.827
Fro is legendary.

2618
01:27:40.868 --> 01:27:42.431
I don't know if you know Eric Frohart.

2619
01:27:42.432 --> 01:27:42.548
Yeah,

2620
01:27:42.591 --> 01:27:42.728
yeah,

2621
01:27:42.771 --> 01:27:42.950
yeah.

2622
01:27:42.951 --> 01:27:43.290
Sure do.

2623
01:27:43.392 --> 01:27:44.993
Fro and I did two platoons together.

2624
01:27:45.470 --> 01:27:49.673
Any guy that names his kids after the Dixie Hazard characters is just going to be a special dude.

2625
01:27:50.439 --> 01:27:51.259
Fro is amazing,

2626
01:27:51.298 --> 01:27:51.478
man.

2627
01:27:51.501 --> 01:27:53.603
I mean,

2628
01:27:53.696 --> 01:27:54.540
we live in alliance,

2629
01:27:54.665 --> 01:27:56.384
man.

2630
01:27:57.087 --> 01:27:57.618
Learn from them.

2631
01:27:57.868 --> 01:27:58.525
I've not always

2632
01:27:59.259 --> 01:27:59.665
I would say

2633
01:28:01.275 --> 01:28:02.087
I've not always been right,

2634
01:28:02.103 --> 01:28:03.790
but I've almost always been around the right people.

2635
01:28:04.087 --> 01:28:05.165
Yeah,

2636
01:28:05.166 --> 01:28:05.259
yeah,

2637
01:28:05.260 --> 01:28:05.368
yeah.

2638
01:28:05.369 --> 01:28:05.493
Well,

2639
01:28:05.494 --> 01:28:06.040
that's what it takes.

2640
01:28:06.304 --> 01:28:07.405
because I've been around the right people,

2641
01:28:08.206 --> 01:28:09.307
I've really been lost.

2642
01:28:09.348 --> 01:28:11.349
I've been wrong a lot.

2643
01:28:12.150 --> 01:28:12.291
Yeah,

2644
01:28:12.292 --> 01:28:13.732
that's how you find your way.

2645
01:28:13.951 --> 01:28:14.455
That's it,

2646
01:28:14.456 --> 01:28:14.932
man.

2647
01:28:15.096 --> 01:28:18.533
And it's also on my LinkedIn.

2648
01:28:18.534 --> 01:28:19.174
My LinkedIn says,

2649
01:28:19.260 --> 01:28:19.697
Fortunate.

2650
01:28:20.498 --> 01:28:20.618
Like,

2651
01:28:20.619 --> 01:28:21.859
why do you say fortunate on your LinkedIn?

2652
01:28:21.860 --> 01:28:22.040
I'm like,

2653
01:28:22.041 --> 01:28:22.960
because I'm fortunate.

2654
01:28:23.101 --> 01:28:23.241
Like,

2655
01:28:23.321 --> 01:28:24.921
yeah,

2656
01:28:24.922 --> 01:28:25.702
it's like.

2657
01:28:25.745 --> 01:28:26.745
You say it on your website.

2658
01:28:26.746 --> 01:28:27.003
I do pull-ups.

2659
01:28:27.004 --> 01:28:27.105
I mean.

2660
01:28:27.106 --> 01:28:27.987
I don't think people appreciate that at all.

2661
01:28:28.187 --> 01:28:28.503
Yeah.

2662
01:28:28.504 --> 01:28:28.644
Like,

2663
01:28:28.645 --> 01:28:29.503
the being fortunate,

2664
01:28:29.550 --> 01:28:29.730
like,

2665
01:28:29.769 --> 01:28:30.167
especially.

2666
01:28:30.245 --> 01:28:30.487
Buddy.

2667
01:28:30.972 --> 01:28:31.112
Yeah,

2668
01:28:31.292 --> 01:28:31.526
like,

2669
01:28:32.128 --> 01:28:33.190
people ask me about it.

2670
01:28:33.589 --> 01:28:33.831
I'm like,

2671
01:28:33.832 --> 01:28:35.073
I'm kind of like Forrest Gump.

2672
01:28:35.355 --> 01:28:36.487
You just kind of lean forward,

2673
01:28:36.534 --> 01:28:37.081
try hard.

2674
01:28:37.394 --> 01:28:38.581
Lieutenant Dan.

2675
01:28:38.582 --> 01:28:39.112
He's running.

2676
01:28:39.222 --> 01:28:39.972
Like,

2677
01:28:40.019 --> 01:28:40.425
Gen A.

2678
01:28:40.440 --> 01:28:42.597
I kept running.

2679
01:28:42.598 --> 01:28:43.487
I kept running.

2680
01:28:44.222 --> 01:28:44.409
And,

2681
01:28:44.456 --> 01:28:45.784
uh.

2682
01:28:45.785 --> 01:28:45.909
So.

2683
01:28:46.503 --> 01:28:46.925
Old school.

2684
01:28:47.472 --> 01:28:47.737
We got,

2685
01:28:47.784 --> 01:28:47.909
like,

2686
01:28:47.910 --> 01:28:48.284
five,

2687
01:28:48.300 --> 01:28:49.269
ten hours.

2688
01:28:49.270 --> 01:28:49.362
We got.

2689
01:28:49.363 --> 01:28:49.503
Well,

2690
01:28:49.504 --> 01:28:49.644
I mean,

2691
01:28:49.753 --> 01:28:49.909
like.

2692
01:28:50.442 --> 01:29:15.466
so much of what we have here in our notes you've covered uh in a random and non-sequential way man but it's very natural this is an encrypted thing this is encrypted yeah chinese communist party listens to this we're gonna chop the big just the high ground man we're looking for the high ground yeah well tell us you know about carry the load and i how that carry the load so carry the load is part of that c4 yeah career compete contribute have a catalyst and

2693
01:29:15.467 --> 01:29:18.623
for me it was a form of contribution you take care of the boys boys take care of you

2694
01:29:19.522 --> 01:29:20.483
And for me,

2695
01:29:20.703 --> 01:29:21.465
Carry the Load,

2696
01:29:25.088 --> 01:29:26.830
it kind of started for me after Red Wings.

2697
01:29:27.049 --> 01:29:29.814
It was the Memorial Day of Fall on Red Wings.

2698
01:29:32.377 --> 01:29:32.994
I was mad.

2699
01:29:33.275 --> 01:29:34.697
I was livid for two reasons.

2700
01:29:34.939 --> 01:29:35.158
One,

2701
01:29:35.353 --> 01:29:40.556
I was mad because the nation wasn't doing Memorial Day the way I needed them to do Memorial Day,

2702
01:29:40.588 --> 01:29:41.681
given all that we had lost.

2703
01:29:41.978 --> 01:29:43.509
And then I was more mad at me.

2704
01:29:44.798 --> 01:29:46.819
Because I had done the world a well time.

2705
01:29:46.820 --> 01:29:48.001
I started losing my friends too.

2706
01:29:48.202 --> 01:29:48.462
Right.

2707
01:29:49.284 --> 01:29:51.585
So I was mad at me more than I was mad at everyone else.

2708
01:29:51.885 --> 01:29:52.007
Yeah.

2709
01:29:52.026 --> 01:29:52.729
So again,

2710
01:29:52.784 --> 01:29:54.245
real quick for our audience.

2711
01:29:54.331 --> 01:29:54.448
Yeah.

2712
01:29:54.870 --> 01:29:55.104
June 28th,

2713
01:29:55.105 --> 01:29:56.526
2005.

2714
01:29:56.527 --> 01:29:57.768
That's Operation Red Wings.

2715
01:29:58.268 --> 01:29:59.932
We lost three SEALs on the ground.

2716
01:30:00.417 --> 01:30:03.557
Another eight SEALs in the helicopter along with eight Army nightstoppers.

2717
01:30:03.714 --> 01:30:04.542
Total loss of life.

2718
01:30:04.557 --> 01:30:05.417
19 men.

2719
01:30:05.542 --> 01:30:06.104
Like that.

2720
01:30:06.105 --> 01:30:06.760
Like instantly.

2721
01:30:06.932 --> 01:30:07.057
So.

2722
01:30:07.885 --> 01:30:08.120
Yeah.

2723
01:30:08.339 --> 01:30:09.745
It was awful.

2724
01:30:10.089 --> 01:30:10.323
And.

2725
01:30:12.330 --> 01:30:12.590
You know,

2726
01:30:12.591 --> 01:30:13.471
and I always tell people,

2727
01:30:13.491 --> 01:30:13.631
like,

2728
01:30:13.632 --> 01:30:14.832
when you breathe that rare air,

2729
01:30:15.213 --> 01:30:16.473
it's all you want to breathe again.

2730
01:30:16.695 --> 01:30:18.137
It's what you want to share with everybody,

2731
01:30:18.316 --> 01:30:18.535
right?

2732
01:30:18.598 --> 01:30:18.797
Like,

2733
01:30:18.855 --> 01:30:20.297
you've had that tribal existence,

2734
01:30:20.336 --> 01:30:20.578
right?

2735
01:30:20.579 --> 01:30:20.820
And so,

2736
01:30:21.656 --> 01:30:23.000
I remember we had a barbecue.

2737
01:30:23.141 --> 01:30:23.359
And so,

2738
01:30:23.578 --> 01:30:24.703
if I use the word civilian,

2739
01:30:24.704 --> 01:30:25.844
it's not derogatory,

2740
01:30:25.883 --> 01:30:27.141
but it's not necessarily complimentary.

2741
01:30:27.142 --> 01:30:28.242
It's kind of like a neutral thing.

2742
01:30:28.313 --> 01:30:29.734
It's not complimentary.

2743
01:30:29.735 --> 01:30:29.922
I'm like,

2744
01:30:29.984 --> 01:30:30.234
sir.

2745
01:30:30.313 --> 01:30:31.172
But if I say someone,

2746
01:30:31.203 --> 01:30:32.250
if I say citizen,

2747
01:30:32.672 --> 01:30:34.109
a citizen is a positive.

2748
01:30:34.344 --> 01:30:34.547
Like,

2749
01:30:35.594 --> 01:30:36.375
if you're a civilian,

2750
01:30:36.438 --> 01:30:39.094
you're just managing downside risk and generally being compliant.

2751
01:30:39.250 --> 01:30:40.016
If you're a civilian.

2752
01:30:40.391 --> 01:30:40.891
A citizen,

2753
01:30:40.922 --> 01:30:41.672
you're doing more than that.

2754
01:30:43.163 --> 01:30:44.345
You're pouring into a community,

2755
01:30:44.405 --> 01:30:46.725
you're doing more than you have to for folks you don't know,

2756
01:30:46.745 --> 01:30:47.007
right?

2757
01:30:48.046 --> 01:30:51.811
So I was at some friend's house and there's great American citizens they hadn't served.

2758
01:30:52.593 --> 01:30:54.296
And it's a really affluent part of town.

2759
01:30:54.335 --> 01:30:54.897
And I was just,

2760
01:30:54.975 --> 01:30:55.257
you know,

2761
01:30:55.538 --> 01:30:57.296
and my bride came up to me and she said,

2762
01:30:57.335 --> 01:30:57.475
hey,

2763
01:30:57.655 --> 01:30:58.577
you're scaring everybody.

2764
01:30:59.280 --> 01:30:59.514
I'm like,

2765
01:30:59.546 --> 01:31:00.296
I'm not scaring everybody.

2766
01:31:00.327 --> 01:31:03.718
And she showed me a picture and I've got tattoos and beard and I'm just leaning against the wall.

2767
01:31:03.719 --> 01:31:03.936
I'm like,

2768
01:31:04.139 --> 01:31:04.405
maybe,

2769
01:31:04.843 --> 01:31:04.999
maybe.

2770
01:31:06.405 --> 01:31:07.686
And she pulled me to the side of the house.

2771
01:31:07.733 --> 01:31:08.952
She put her hands on my shoulders.

2772
01:31:08.953 --> 01:31:09.186
She goes,

2773
01:31:09.249 --> 01:31:09.468
listen,

2774
01:31:09.593 --> 01:31:10.296
I love you.

2775
01:31:11.678 --> 01:31:12.499
and I miss them too.

2776
01:31:13.279 --> 01:31:14.281
And I know you miss this."

2777
01:31:14.320 --> 01:31:16.402
And she's just here to the weekend.

2778
01:31:16.403 --> 01:31:16.664
And she goes,

2779
01:31:16.665 --> 01:31:19.625
but I've never seen you not do something about things that bother you.

2780
01:31:19.626 --> 01:31:20.867
So do something or get over it.

2781
01:31:21.508 --> 01:31:21.726
Wow.

2782
01:31:22.367 --> 01:31:22.531
Wow.

2783
01:31:22.570 --> 01:31:24.453
We've been together since my second class.

2784
01:31:24.454 --> 01:31:25.531
I can see why you're married at the moment.

2785
01:31:25.532 --> 01:31:25.789
Yeah.

2786
01:31:25.930 --> 01:31:27.336
And she's smoking hot too.

2787
01:31:27.337 --> 01:31:29.953
There you go.

2788
01:31:29.954 --> 01:31:32.078
I got to tell you something about smoking hot and we coming back.

2789
01:31:32.906 --> 01:31:34.703
So I met my wife at SEAL Team 10.

2790
01:31:34.704 --> 01:31:35.078
Oh yeah.

2791
01:31:35.079 --> 01:31:35.609
She was the PA.

2792
01:31:36.140 --> 01:31:36.781
That's dangerous.

2793
01:31:36.906 --> 01:31:37.109
Yeah.

2794
01:31:37.265 --> 01:31:37.515
Oh yeah.

2795
01:31:37.625 --> 01:31:38.687
We had Afghanistan.

2796
01:31:40.242 --> 01:31:59.200
when i first got there i was writing down little attributes of everybody like okay bald tall yeah like and becca walks in i'm like smoking smoking hot smoking hot rigging bobby yeah so she grabs you by the shoulders yeah yeah and so i went home and i put a pound in my pack for every person that i'd lost and i just kind of started going i

2797
01:31:59.201 --> 01:32:09.075
mean in in coleman says it really well good pain pushes out bad pain right and um that's interesting and so i was i mean it was and so i just was going And I go,

2798
01:32:09.247 --> 01:32:09.716
I just.

2799
01:32:10.471 --> 01:32:11.131
And so I remember,

2800
01:32:11.711 --> 01:32:12.733
I can remember this vividly.

2801
01:32:13.553 --> 01:32:21.084
There's a place here in Dallas called White Rock Lake and there's this beautiful kind of 10 mile circuit and I was just going around it and it was hot and it hurt and I needed that.

2802
01:32:21.225 --> 01:32:22.366
Because like Coleman says,

2803
01:32:22.405 --> 01:32:23.545
good pain brings out bad pain.

2804
01:32:24.405 --> 01:32:24.608
And

2805
01:32:26.147 --> 01:32:28.303
Chris Kyle said that to me too before he lost me.

2806
01:32:28.475 --> 01:32:28.647
And

2807
01:32:29.772 --> 01:32:32.225
I came around the corner and there's this kind of World War II gentleman,

2808
01:32:32.256 --> 01:32:32.834
I could just tell.

2809
01:32:33.100 --> 01:32:34.350
He's like Ramrod Strayed,

2810
01:32:34.397 --> 01:32:37.662
this military bearing that you have when you save the world and you know it.

2811
01:32:38.410 --> 01:32:58.346
and i revere that generation right and they're imperfect just like the rest of us because their name's not jesus either but they're pretty remarkable generation and i was going to say something to him as i got close to him but as i got close to him actually said something to me first i pulled my headphones out and he said son i said yes sir he goes who are you carrying wow wow he knew it

2812
01:32:58.611 --> 01:33:04.299
and it in i shared a name with him that was on my mind and he just and And he didn't even say anything.

2813
01:33:04.300 --> 01:33:05.002
He just kind of knew.

2814
01:33:05.955 --> 01:33:07.080
And so I would do that.

2815
01:33:07.682 --> 01:33:20.478
you know every memorial day i just put on my pack and sometimes start at midnight and and i'll tell people like memorial day is midnight monday through sure sure and i don't want people to like our friends that we miss would have

2816
01:33:20.967 --> 01:33:23.248
celebrated and had great parties on Memorial Day too,

2817
01:33:23.928 --> 01:33:25.627
but they would have remembered why you're doing it.

2818
01:33:25.628 --> 01:33:27.068
So it's not about mourning though,

2819
01:33:27.069 --> 01:33:28.728
but it's about celebrating and remembering,

2820
01:33:28.767 --> 01:33:29.029
right?

2821
01:33:29.568 --> 01:33:30.592
And I would just go and I'd go,

2822
01:33:31.146 --> 01:33:31.412
you know,

2823
01:33:31.568 --> 01:33:31.849
40,

2824
01:33:31.967 --> 01:33:34.748
50 miles and call my wife and she'd come pick me up.

2825
01:33:37.068 --> 01:33:39.553
And so what happened is these great American citizens,

2826
01:33:39.678 --> 01:33:40.068
they were like,

2827
01:33:40.209 --> 01:33:40.459
hey,

2828
01:33:41.287 --> 01:33:42.256
can I walk with you?

2829
01:33:43.367 --> 01:33:44.548
Another Forrest Gump moment.

2830
01:33:44.628 --> 01:33:45.308
Yeah,

2831
01:33:45.309 --> 01:33:45.490
right?

2832
01:33:45.491 --> 01:33:45.710
Yeah.

2833
01:33:45.849 --> 01:33:45.970
No,

2834
01:33:46.109 --> 01:33:47.371
I hadn't thought about that until just now.

2835
01:33:47.453 --> 01:33:50.554
But I didn't really want to at first because I thought I craved solitude,

2836
01:33:50.574 --> 01:33:50.976
but I didn't.

2837
01:33:51.273 --> 01:33:52.312
I craved sincerity,

2838
01:33:52.414 --> 01:33:53.218
not solitude.

2839
01:33:53.281 --> 01:33:54.140
Right.

2840
01:33:54.156 --> 01:33:54.875
There you go.

2841
01:33:54.960 --> 01:33:57.125
And so they would start and they would tell me about their uncle.

2842
01:33:57.804 --> 01:33:58.984
And I just fell in love.

2843
01:33:59.218 --> 01:33:59.484
Wow.

2844
01:33:59.640 --> 01:34:00.328
And so I was like,

2845
01:34:00.359 --> 01:34:00.484
hey,

2846
01:34:00.485 --> 01:34:01.000
who are you carrying?

2847
01:34:01.001 --> 01:34:01.625
Who are you carrying?

2848
01:34:01.640 --> 01:34:03.062
And so it turned into this.

2849
01:34:03.875 --> 01:34:05.984
And I remember calling Steve and Holly and going,

2850
01:34:06.015 --> 01:34:06.250
hey,

2851
01:34:07.031 --> 01:34:07.656
I wanted to do this.

2852
01:34:07.657 --> 01:34:08.437
Will you do this with me?

2853
01:34:09.296 --> 01:34:10.875
And so we did the first carry the load.

2854
01:34:10.937 --> 01:34:11.687
and it was a

2855
01:34:11.971 --> 01:34:15.635
you know down here at Wild Rock Lake it was a 20 hour and 11 minute walk around

2856
01:34:16.297 --> 01:34:37.594
Wild Rock Lake and it was awesome and it is like you know Holly comes from big family so it was a week before like 48 people had signed up and 30 of them related to Steven and uh but then like 800 people showed up and Alex Scott it wasn't even the end of that memorial day where people are coming up to me Great America says go hey uh

2857
01:34:37.595 --> 01:34:41.313
I've already called my friends where are we doing this next year yeah

2858
01:34:41.719 --> 01:34:44.599
And so the following year we did it down to this place called Riverside Park.

2859
01:34:44.600 --> 01:34:48.400
But what we also did is we walked to Dallas from the cemetery at West Point.

2860
01:34:49.322 --> 01:34:50.221
And that's what Coleman did.

2861
01:34:50.244 --> 01:34:50.783
So Coleman,

2862
01:34:51.799 --> 01:34:52.744
we were in at this-

2863
01:34:53.244 --> 01:34:54.400
Dallas to West Point,

2864
01:34:54.401 --> 01:34:54.924
fucking New York.

2865
01:34:55.181 --> 01:34:55.346
Yeah.

2866
01:34:55.439 --> 01:34:57.361
So every five miles,

2867
01:34:57.603 --> 01:34:58.775
so beginning of the month of May,

2868
01:34:59.150 --> 01:35:01.322
and every five miles we'd walk 24 seven.

2869
01:35:01.838 --> 01:35:05.478
And every five miles you'd walk with a family if somebody lost somebody.

2870
01:35:05.479 --> 01:35:05.603
Yeah,

2871
01:35:05.650 --> 01:35:07.463
here you're carrying it and they tell you and you tell them.

2872
01:35:07.931 --> 01:35:10.181
And I would carry Megan Valentine on my shoulders,

2873
01:35:10.306 --> 01:35:10.541
you know,

2874
01:35:10.619 --> 01:35:11.010
Tommy's.

2875
01:35:11.407 --> 01:35:34.877
yeah tommy v i'd carry megan on my shoulders and and uh um and i'd walk with the sons and then we did it was awesome as i watched these kids grew up and you you go back the fifth year in a row and this this kid's like hey you're back i'm like i told you no one's gonna forget your dad we're not gonna let you know my dad died when i was young and to this day if someone walks in the room and says hey i know your dad i

2876
01:35:35.408 --> 01:35:39.190
i just you know i don't want anybody to ever forget him because i need help remembering him

2877
01:35:40.187 --> 01:35:40.307
Right.

2878
01:35:40.308 --> 01:35:42.290
And young in.

2879
01:35:42.291 --> 01:35:42.729
And one of the things,

2880
01:35:42.770 --> 01:35:43.011
Stephen,

2881
01:35:43.012 --> 01:35:43.591
I said is like,

2882
01:35:44.593 --> 01:35:47.534
I want our kids to not remember not doing Memorial Day well.

2883
01:35:48.374 --> 01:35:52.577
My oldest is 22 and she doesn't remember care a little bit about

2884
01:35:52.983 --> 01:35:54.077
Memorial Day without carry load.

2885
01:35:54.078 --> 01:35:55.640
And and what's amazing now,

2886
01:35:55.725 --> 01:35:56.202
like Stephen,

2887
01:35:56.436 --> 01:35:58.765
I retired from it because I'm an invasion guy.

2888
01:35:59.561 --> 01:36:00.843
I'm not really an occupation guy.

2889
01:36:01.108 --> 01:36:02.249
Once there's a bunch of spreadsheets,

2890
01:36:02.250 --> 01:36:02.515
I'm like,

2891
01:36:02.608 --> 01:36:02.733
Oh,

2892
01:36:02.734 --> 01:36:02.827
yeah.

2893
01:36:02.828 --> 01:36:04.390
You know,

2894
01:36:04.483 --> 01:36:05.530
like sometimes you need a linebacker,

2895
01:36:05.546 --> 01:36:06.858
somebody's you quarterback and you know,

2896
01:36:06.859 --> 01:36:06.968
we.

2897
01:36:07.847 --> 01:36:11.051
I felt like Steven needed to,

2898
01:36:11.631 --> 01:36:15.619
he was a better leader for the season we were in and then I needed to kind of square some things away.

2899
01:36:16.517 --> 01:36:18.338
But it's kind of taken our life on its own now.

2900
01:36:18.478 --> 01:36:18.900
Like people,

2901
01:36:19.799 --> 01:36:20.556
it's what's incredible.

2902
01:36:20.619 --> 01:36:22.705
I think we've given them something like 42 million.

2903
01:36:22.885 --> 01:36:23.119
Yeah,

2904
01:36:23.120 --> 01:36:24.088
we looked it up this morning.

2905
01:36:24.478 --> 01:36:25.885
And it's something you do every morning.

2906
01:36:25.900 --> 01:36:26.619
Every morning.

2907
01:36:26.620 --> 01:36:26.744
Well,

2908
01:36:26.745 --> 01:36:27.010
I don't,

2909
01:36:27.088 --> 01:36:27.369
maybe,

2910
01:36:27.713 --> 01:36:28.463
like just usually,

2911
01:36:28.464 --> 01:36:28.775
like,

2912
01:36:28.822 --> 01:36:32.306
I don't know if I could do like a fucking three-week track from.

2913
01:36:32.759 --> 01:36:47.776
dallas too well no one really does right no one really does there's there's there's there's oh okay you just have a little okay yeah so it's five miles oh god and i think you know when i did the national relay last i think we walked with something like 30

2914
01:36:48.354 --> 01:37:00.831
000 people wow there you go right we had like four different relays going on east coast west coast and and uh and then you know in dallas i mean on sunday we'll have 20 25 000 people on a three-day weekend in dallas they'll come in from the lake.

2915
01:37:01.268 --> 01:37:01.393
Yeah.

2916
01:37:01.703 --> 01:37:18.464
to walk for a little while and my whole thing is like it's all relative like my sister i get choked up when i think about this like my sister i have an older sister like that first year i don't know i probably did 40 something miles and stuff like that and she did six and her six meant more than my 48.

2917
01:37:18.495 --> 01:37:28.745
because my thing is carrying more than you have to for than you think you can for someone you miss or something i wish you would have known right wow and i'll tell one story about carrie Lode as Megan.

2918
01:37:29.558 --> 01:37:29.667
So

2919
01:37:30.074 --> 01:37:30.527
Megan and...

2920
01:37:31.055 --> 01:37:34.458
Her mom and her brother JT had come down to Dallas to be a part of Cary Lowe.

2921
01:37:34.459 --> 01:37:36.401
And we carried Adam Brown this year.

2922
01:37:36.421 --> 01:37:36.862
So we had

2923
01:37:37.522 --> 01:37:38.944
Adam's portrait was on the bus.

2924
01:37:38.983 --> 01:37:40.526
And we drove the bus through Hot Springs.

2925
01:37:41.401 --> 01:37:44.565
And his daughter Savannah lives right by Katie Trail Ice House.

2926
01:37:45.433 --> 01:37:47.526
And she sent me a picture on Monday morning.

2927
01:37:47.667 --> 01:37:48.886
She started walking.

2928
01:37:49.479 --> 01:37:52.136
And she walked right into the storyboard that told the story of her dad.

2929
01:37:53.651 --> 01:37:55.245
It was really incredible.

2930
01:37:55.964 --> 01:37:57.636
And so I'm carrying Megan.

2931
01:37:57.854 --> 01:37:58.745
I'm carrying my daughter.

2932
01:37:59.558 --> 01:37:59.823
And then,

2933
01:37:59.901 --> 01:38:00.089
uh,

2934
01:38:00.751 --> 01:38:01.953
I put Megan down and she goes,

2935
01:38:02.132 --> 01:38:02.933
hangs out with her mom.

2936
01:38:02.953 --> 01:38:03.814
And so Maddie,

2937
01:38:03.834 --> 01:38:04.414
my oldest,

2938
01:38:04.695 --> 01:38:07.398
we're kind of walking on a trail and she's old man.

2939
01:38:07.418 --> 01:38:09.722
And she kind of looks at me and she's the old soul.

2940
01:38:09.777 --> 01:38:11.160
She's the one that was born while I was over.

2941
01:38:11.183 --> 01:38:13.902
And she's the one that endured most of my mistakes.

2942
01:38:13.903 --> 01:38:15.207
I was just the most aware of them,

2943
01:38:15.347 --> 01:38:15.605
you know,

2944
01:38:16.222 --> 01:38:16.425
and,

2945
01:38:16.488 --> 01:38:16.722
um,

2946
01:38:18.144 --> 01:38:19.332
she's kind of like my protector.

2947
01:38:19.613 --> 01:38:20.003
It's really.

2948
01:38:21.669 --> 01:38:40.549
inverse what should be and uh and uh so we're holding hands she goes dad are you sad and i said yeah i'm sad i said but i could be sad because i miss my friends or i could be sad because i never knew such men i'll take this sad yeah you can choose your sad you can't often choose whether

2949
01:38:40.550 --> 01:38:50.737
or not to be sad but you can choose which side you're going to be and so for me and it was you know it was interesting the weekend before we lost chris i was at an event

2950
01:38:51.513 --> 01:39:09.623
with tay and chris and chris and i were just texting and uh yeah and um american sniper yeah it was the best i'd seen him was the best that's him and tay and uh you know i was someone with the keiko for that and uh um and

2951
01:39:09.670 --> 01:39:14.904
uh you know we talked about that like you know it's it's it's

2952
01:39:16.436 --> 01:39:19.795
I'd rather be sad because I miss my friends than to have never known

2953
01:39:21.213 --> 01:39:40.367
you know someone like groove you know someone like yeah you know really me and and you know all the guy chris and you know all the guy dan i mean you know like that's the the price of admission right and and that's the cool thing about authenticity man is you

2954
01:39:40.368 --> 01:39:46.617
know when you grab those memories only the gold kind of comes up with you and like

2955
01:39:47.413 --> 01:40:05.231
the good stuff stays with you and and the stuff that you're afraid of tends to fall off to the side right yeah you fear rejections you share this thing that you think people are going to reject you and only ones that you don't need to be around will like there's there's a there's a culling that happens with authenticity i

2956
01:40:05.232 --> 01:40:14.059
think there's also remembrance that happens too because you're remembering like that's like you know one thing that we've talked about before but like authenticity is the highest ranking emotion.

2957
01:40:14.565 --> 01:40:17.068
and experience energetically above love,

2958
01:40:17.148 --> 01:40:17.588
kindness,

2959
01:40:17.668 --> 01:40:18.008
anything.

2960
01:40:18.308 --> 01:40:19.949
And I think the one that connects you.

2961
01:40:20.312 --> 01:40:20.550
Yeah,

2962
01:40:20.652 --> 01:40:21.172
the mortar.

2963
01:40:21.570 --> 01:40:22.234
It's like kind of a.

2964
01:40:22.235 --> 01:40:22.976
Because all these,

2965
01:40:23.211 --> 01:40:23.453
I mean,

2966
01:40:23.992 --> 01:40:26.859
the palette of emotions is shared across all humanity.

2967
01:40:27.375 --> 01:40:27.601
Right.

2968
01:40:27.602 --> 01:40:27.820
You know,

2969
01:40:27.821 --> 01:40:29.242
the experiences may be different,

2970
01:40:29.243 --> 01:40:35.211
but those experiences reverse engineer into a particular emotion that is not unique to any human,

2971
01:40:35.445 --> 01:40:36.023
right?

2972
01:40:36.024 --> 01:40:36.211
Right.

2973
01:40:36.461 --> 01:40:37.789
So that palette of emotions,

2974
01:40:37.804 --> 01:40:39.273
we all draw and we all share that,

2975
01:40:39.383 --> 01:40:39.570
right?

2976
01:40:39.571 --> 01:40:39.726
Right,

2977
01:40:39.804 --> 01:40:40.008
right.

2978
01:40:40.226 --> 01:40:40.586
And John,

2979
01:40:40.587 --> 01:40:41.133
I'll tell you that.

2980
01:40:41.304 --> 01:40:42.429
like we you know

2981
01:40:43.589 --> 01:40:44.789
An oversimplification,

2982
01:40:45.489 --> 01:40:46.830
I think there's three kinds of people in the world.

2983
01:40:46.831 --> 01:40:48.168
There's good people doing good things,

2984
01:40:48.231 --> 01:40:49.289
good people doing bad things,

2985
01:40:49.352 --> 01:40:50.512
bad people doing bad things.

2986
01:40:51.110 --> 01:40:52.547
And there are bad people doing bad things.

2987
01:40:52.594 --> 01:40:53.672
There is absolute evil.

2988
01:40:53.828 --> 01:40:55.188
And you deal with them on their terms,

2989
01:40:55.274 --> 01:40:55.469
right?

2990
01:40:55.508 --> 01:40:57.492
Like every mission is a capture kill,

2991
01:40:57.516 --> 01:40:58.610
but the bad guy gets a vote.

2992
01:40:58.735 --> 01:40:58.875
Hey,

2993
01:40:58.914 --> 01:40:59.352
stop it.

2994
01:40:59.353 --> 01:40:59.469
No.

2995
01:40:59.797 --> 01:41:00.047
Okay.

2996
01:41:00.453 --> 01:41:00.688
Right?

2997
01:41:01.407 --> 01:41:05.672
But the vast majority of the world is either good people doing good things or good people doing bad things.

2998
01:41:05.828 --> 01:41:09.672
And the ultimate application of American might.

2999
01:41:09.917 --> 01:41:14.441
is to change the circumstances to where good people doing bad things can start doing good things.

3000
01:41:15.504 --> 01:41:20.527
And I would tell you there's not a lot of yield people in the world.

3001
01:41:20.590 --> 01:41:21.449
Most people are good.

3002
01:41:21.707 --> 01:41:22.730
Most people are good people doing.

3003
01:41:22.731 --> 01:41:23.511
Of course.

3004
01:41:23.512 --> 01:41:25.293
And even though,

3005
01:41:25.410 --> 01:41:25.636
you know,

3006
01:41:25.637 --> 01:41:27.293
I think good people do bad things because they're scared,

3007
01:41:27.340 --> 01:41:27.636
coiled,

3008
01:41:28.511 --> 01:41:28.996
coerced,

3009
01:41:29.043 --> 01:41:30.152
or uninformed,

3010
01:41:30.153 --> 01:41:31.558
and you alter those circumstances,

3011
01:41:31.605 --> 01:41:32.496
but most people are good.

3012
01:41:33.043 --> 01:41:34.480
And there's a lot to be hopeful about,

3013
01:41:34.543 --> 01:41:34.886
right?

3014
01:41:34.887 --> 01:41:35.402
Amen.

3015
01:41:35.590 --> 01:41:38.168
And authenticity is what allows you to have that conversation.

3016
01:41:38.309 --> 01:41:38.589
Right,

3017
01:41:38.729 --> 01:41:38.990
right.

3018
01:41:38.991 --> 01:41:40.291
And really see the person who they are.

3019
01:41:40.292 --> 01:41:40.432
Well,

3020
01:41:40.433 --> 01:41:40.871
you'd see it.

3021
01:41:40.872 --> 01:41:42.695
You'd do one of the shakes and some of these other things.

3022
01:41:42.696 --> 01:41:42.953
Oh,

3023
01:41:42.954 --> 01:41:43.035
yeah.

3024
01:41:43.036 --> 01:41:43.375
And all of a sudden,

3025
01:41:43.376 --> 01:41:44.797
you see the way they treat their kid.

3026
01:41:44.836 --> 01:41:46.035
And hey,

3027
01:41:46.036 --> 01:41:46.898
are you a father too?

3028
01:41:47.016 --> 01:41:47.617
And the minute,

3029
01:41:49.219 --> 01:41:49.461
you know,

3030
01:41:50.023 --> 01:41:51.398
there's a total language barrier,

3031
01:41:51.445 --> 01:41:52.445
total culture barrier.

3032
01:41:53.320 --> 01:41:53.805
But all of a sudden,

3033
01:41:53.844 --> 01:41:55.351
you're seeing a guy love his daughter.

3034
01:41:56.211 --> 01:41:57.586
And he knows you have a daughter too.

3035
01:41:57.601 --> 01:41:59.414
And now you're having a different conversation.

3036
01:41:59.851 --> 01:42:00.711
Yeah.

3037
01:42:00.712 --> 01:42:03.867
And so I think the power of human emotions is shared across all humanity.

3038
01:42:03.930 --> 01:42:06.133
And authenticity allows us to kind of.

3039
01:42:06.233 --> 01:42:26.131
create those bridges where we didn't think there were any yeah yeah i agree and preserve bridges that we thought were going to blow up when you told her the truth like yeah man yeah here's what you don't know about me and we're like oh really but one i did know so now you're just being honest with me yeah and or two i sure wore that too right right it's liberating yeah i

3040
01:42:26.146 --> 01:42:35.927
thought like one i mean one thing i thought to be close you mentioned like a gun versus a weapon yeah i love to hear your weapon what would be your weapon of choice if you would

3041
01:42:37.274 --> 01:42:37.774
Hmm.

3042
01:42:37.775 --> 01:42:38.555
It doesn't have to be different.

3043
01:42:38.696 --> 01:42:38.815
No,

3044
01:42:38.975 --> 01:42:40.036
but I like the map.

3045
01:42:40.577 --> 01:42:40.977
Yeah.

3046
01:42:40.978 --> 01:42:41.516
What came first?

3047
01:42:41.618 --> 01:42:42.360
Did something come to mind?

3048
01:42:42.380 --> 01:42:42.520
Yeah,

3049
01:42:42.540 --> 01:42:43.161
it sure did.

3050
01:42:43.559 --> 01:42:43.821
Yes.

3051
01:42:44.540 --> 01:42:44.903
My heart.

3052
01:42:45.301 --> 01:42:45.544
Your heart.

3053
01:42:45.645 --> 01:42:45.840
Okay.

3054
01:42:46.083 --> 01:42:46.262
Yeah.

3055
01:42:46.481 --> 01:42:46.880
My heart,

3056
01:42:47.887 --> 01:42:48.184
I think.

3057
01:42:48.364 --> 01:42:50.567
And it comes to authenticity and vulnerability.

3058
01:42:50.645 --> 01:42:51.465
Yeah.

3059
01:42:51.630 --> 01:42:54.372
If I am connected with my fellow man,

3060
01:42:54.544 --> 01:42:54.856
woman,

3061
01:42:55.590 --> 01:42:56.919
fellow warrior next to me,

3062
01:42:57.106 --> 01:42:58.356
like you were talking about your bride.

3063
01:42:58.372 --> 01:42:59.590
My bride is that warrior.

3064
01:42:59.653 --> 01:43:00.231
Holy cow.

3065
01:43:00.731 --> 01:43:00.934
Yeah.

3066
01:43:00.935 --> 01:43:02.122
And if I'm connected with that,

3067
01:43:02.372 --> 01:43:04.200
then there's nothing that could stop us.

3068
01:43:04.247 --> 01:43:04.544
Yeah.

3069
01:43:04.733 --> 01:43:05.434
Yeah.

3070
01:43:05.435 --> 01:43:05.954
I always feel like,

3071
01:43:05.974 --> 01:43:06.114
hey,

3072
01:43:06.115 --> 01:43:07.034
the boys know you don't know.

3073
01:43:07.476 --> 01:43:07.597
Oh,

3074
01:43:07.675 --> 01:43:08.056
yeah.

3075
01:43:08.057 --> 01:43:08.835
The boys know you don't know.

3076
01:43:08.937 --> 01:43:09.999
You're like an ensign,

3077
01:43:10.198 --> 01:43:10.679
an lieutenant,

3078
01:43:10.718 --> 01:43:10.941
JG,

3079
01:43:11.320 --> 01:43:11.620
you know,

3080
01:43:12.038 --> 01:43:12.382
whatever,

3081
01:43:12.460 --> 01:43:12.679
right?

3082
01:43:13.163 --> 01:43:14.304
The boys already know you don't know.

3083
01:43:14.866 --> 01:43:16.343
And when you let them know you don't know,

3084
01:43:17.148 --> 01:43:18.304
then they just know they can trust you.

3085
01:43:18.343 --> 01:43:18.468
Yeah.

3086
01:43:18.469 --> 01:43:18.687
Yeah.

3087
01:43:20.007 --> 01:43:20.906
When the boys trust you,

3088
01:43:21.374 --> 01:43:21.796
they are.

3089
01:43:25.560 --> 01:43:38.810
legendary right yeah yeah yeah i mean i would say one my one would be kindness that's the first thing that come up for me is being kind that's a good one you know and that's like you know and being also not just kind of others kind of yourselves where it really starts do you think there's a distinction between being kind and being nice yes

3090
01:43:38.825 --> 01:43:51.622
huge absolutely oh my god oh yeah i'll tell you what it is right i heard this joke right you might have heard like good so um so someone so there's two different people right east coast west coast right west coast people are

3091
01:43:51.836 --> 01:44:08.397
nice right east coast people are kind right i uh if you have a flat tire right a um and you're on the side of the road you have flat tire someone from the west coast would drive by it's like oh my god sorry you have a flat tire that sucks right and they'll just drive on just drive on right a

3092
01:44:08.428 --> 01:44:15.787
kind person like from new york will come and uh help you fix the tire make fun of you the whole make fun of you the whole fucking time

3093
01:44:17.049 --> 01:44:18.710
And that's been the big funny.

3094
01:44:18.731 --> 01:44:19.350
You're like,

3095
01:44:19.351 --> 01:44:20.092
you know how to change your goddamn tire?

3096
01:44:20.093 --> 01:44:20.694
What's wrong with you?

3097
01:44:21.014 --> 01:44:22.436
As you're changing your fucking tire.

3098
01:44:22.437 --> 01:44:23.315
I like that.

3099
01:44:23.655 --> 01:44:24.975
What would you say the Deer Swing kind of nice?

3100
01:44:24.976 --> 01:44:25.100
Oh,

3101
01:44:25.217 --> 01:44:26.616
so I actually use this.

3102
01:44:26.678 --> 01:44:26.960
And again,

3103
01:44:26.961 --> 01:44:27.796
this is semantics,

3104
01:44:27.797 --> 01:44:27.897
right?

3105
01:44:27.898 --> 01:44:28.077
Yeah,

3106
01:44:28.078 --> 01:44:28.241
yeah.

3107
01:44:28.600 --> 01:44:28.717
No,

3108
01:44:29.624 --> 01:44:29.944
I mean,

3109
01:44:29.945 --> 01:44:30.202
it is.

3110
01:44:30.203 --> 01:44:30.342
I mean,

3111
01:44:30.343 --> 01:44:30.905
a lot of the time,

3112
01:44:30.906 --> 01:44:33.639
the kind person is being,

3113
01:44:34.186 --> 01:44:34.467
or sorry,

3114
01:44:34.546 --> 01:44:39.936
the nice person is being nice because they're a people pleaser and they just want to be seen as nice.

3115
01:44:39.937 --> 01:44:40.046
Right,

3116
01:44:40.047 --> 01:44:40.155
yeah.

3117
01:44:40.264 --> 01:44:40.749
Totally.

3118
01:44:41.030 --> 01:44:42.577
The kind person is authentic.

3119
01:44:42.827 --> 01:44:42.967
Right.

3120
01:44:42.968 --> 01:44:44.499
And they're being that way because.

3121
01:44:44.514 --> 01:44:44.733
Yeah.

3122
01:44:45.136 --> 01:44:47.098
That is truly who they are.

3123
01:44:47.479 --> 01:44:47.678
Now,

3124
01:44:47.998 --> 01:44:50.541
a kind person doesn't have to be nice.

3125
01:44:50.823 --> 01:44:53.225
I would say that there's times where being nice isn't kind.

3126
01:44:53.444 --> 01:44:53.967
Exactly.

3127
01:44:54.264 --> 01:44:54.389
Oh,

3128
01:44:54.506 --> 01:44:54.827
yeah.

3129
01:44:54.905 --> 01:44:56.248
Love doesn't feel like love sometimes.

3130
01:44:56.288 --> 01:44:56.444
Yeah,

3131
01:44:56.445 --> 01:44:57.030
it's fake.

3132
01:44:57.045 --> 01:44:57.170
Yeah,

3133
01:44:57.171 --> 01:44:58.952
I don't want to tell people what they fucking want to hear.

3134
01:44:59.209 --> 01:44:59.670
Stuff like that.

3135
01:44:59.748 --> 01:45:01.889
I don't want somebody to tell me that they love me.

3136
01:45:01.967 --> 01:45:03.217
I don't want bullshit ever.

3137
01:45:03.467 --> 01:45:05.780
I say nice is a behavior.

3138
01:45:06.280 --> 01:45:07.217
Kind is a state.

3139
01:45:07.218 --> 01:45:07.920
Yeah,

3140
01:45:07.998 --> 01:45:08.561
exactly.

3141
01:45:08.639 --> 01:45:09.405
There you go.

3142
01:45:09.406 --> 01:45:10.280
And these aren't right or wrong.

3143
01:45:10.608 --> 01:45:13.327
What we've decided is there should be a nice of being kind.

3144
01:45:13.868 --> 01:45:13.989
Yeah.

3145
01:45:13.990 --> 01:45:15.890
Your tradecraft is about being nice.

3146
01:45:16.531 --> 01:45:16.671
Yeah.

3147
01:45:17.312 --> 01:45:17.552
You know,

3148
01:45:17.553 --> 01:45:20.376
if you're on the tradecraft side of things,

3149
01:45:20.396 --> 01:45:21.974
you're masterful at being nice.

3150
01:45:21.975 --> 01:45:22.740
Yeah.

3151
01:45:22.741 --> 01:45:23.021
A spy.

3152
01:45:23.022 --> 01:45:23.997
I'm being nice.

3153
01:45:23.998 --> 01:45:24.161
Yeah,

3154
01:45:24.240 --> 01:45:24.536
exactly.

3155
01:45:24.537 --> 01:45:25.997
So I can ultimately not be very kind.

3156
01:45:26.021 --> 01:45:26.138
Well,

3157
01:45:26.161 --> 01:45:26.818
manipulative.

3158
01:45:26.904 --> 01:45:27.724
Nice is almost.

3159
01:45:27.943 --> 01:45:31.044
I'm being nice so I can be unkind at the time and place of my changing.

3160
01:45:31.247 --> 01:45:32.091
Put a bullet in your head.

3161
01:45:32.232 --> 01:45:32.419
Right,

3162
01:45:32.560 --> 01:45:32.794
right.

3163
01:45:33.247 --> 01:45:33.654
Allegedly.

3164
01:45:34.044 --> 01:45:34.169
Well,

3165
01:45:34.185 --> 01:45:34.794
this has been great,

3166
01:45:34.825 --> 01:45:35.091
Clint.

3167
01:45:35.169 --> 01:45:35.294
Wow.

3168
01:45:35.325 --> 01:45:36.013
Thank you so much.

3169
01:45:36.029 --> 01:45:36.154
Oh,

3170
01:45:36.155 --> 01:45:36.544
my God.

3171
01:45:36.545 --> 01:45:36.966
So much.

3172
01:45:36.967 --> 01:45:37.997
I feel like I was random.

3173
01:45:37.998 --> 01:45:38.919
I feel like I was all over the place.

3174
01:45:38.920 --> 01:45:39.029
No,

3175
01:45:39.091 --> 01:45:39.216
no.

3176
01:45:39.513 --> 01:45:40.029
We brought you back.

3177
01:45:40.030 --> 01:45:42.154
All boiled down to authenticity.

3178
01:45:42.155 --> 01:45:42.919
Get on the fucking map.

3179
01:45:43.228 --> 01:45:43.889
Get on a map.

3180
01:45:44.330 --> 01:45:45.131
Be authentic.

3181
01:45:45.269 --> 01:45:45.890
Be vulnerable.

3182
01:45:45.891 --> 01:45:46.492
Don't be lost.

3183
01:45:46.511 --> 01:45:46.953
Don't be lost.

3184
01:45:46.954 --> 01:45:47.953
You know what I mean?

3185
01:45:47.954 --> 01:45:48.535
Don't be lost.

3186
01:45:48.676 --> 01:45:48.894
Right.

3187
01:45:49.754 --> 01:45:50.554
And even when you're wrong,

3188
01:45:50.555 --> 01:45:51.215
you might not be wrong.

3189
01:45:51.238 --> 01:45:52.074
You might just be early.

3190
01:45:52.277 --> 01:45:52.480
Yeah.

3191
01:45:52.481 --> 01:45:55.160
The way to know the difference is to surround yourself with authentic people.

3192
01:45:55.480 --> 01:45:55.660
Right.

3193
01:45:55.738 --> 01:45:56.238
Exactly.

3194
01:45:56.285 --> 01:45:58.402
Authentic people will tell you you're wrong until you're early.

3195
01:45:58.582 --> 01:45:59.722
And they'll always tell you you're lost.

3196
01:46:00.285 --> 01:46:01.629
And I'm entering that conversation,

3197
01:46:01.988 --> 01:46:02.926
you're not lost anymore.

3198
01:46:03.004 --> 01:46:03.972
Yeah.

3199
01:46:03.973 --> 01:46:04.113
Yeah.

3200
01:46:04.114 --> 01:46:04.769
Lost is a choice.

3201
01:46:05.363 --> 01:46:05.894
Last question,

3202
01:46:05.926 --> 01:46:06.144
man,

3203
01:46:06.238 --> 01:46:07.551
for those who are tuning in,

3204
01:46:07.785 --> 01:46:08.238
watching,

3205
01:46:08.316 --> 01:46:08.613
listening.

3206
01:46:08.614 --> 01:46:08.738
Yeah.

3207
01:46:08.847 --> 01:46:10.332
What's the best way for them to get a hold of you?

3208
01:46:10.612 --> 01:46:13.355
LinkedIn is the only social media I somewhat understand.

3209
01:46:13.476 --> 01:46:14.335
I have an Instagram.

3210
01:46:14.355 --> 01:46:17.878
My daughter's told me like real Clint Bruce and I got it.

3211
01:46:17.879 --> 01:46:19.159
I can't remember the password right now.

3212
01:46:19.238 --> 01:46:20.120
It's okay.

3213
01:46:20.183 --> 01:46:20.941
So it's a link.

3214
01:46:21.300 --> 01:46:21.503
Yeah.

3215
01:46:21.784 --> 01:46:24.683
LinkedIn and then real Clint Bruce on Instagram and the Facebook.

3216
01:46:24.925 --> 01:46:25.183
Um,

3217
01:46:25.269 --> 01:46:27.128
but I'm better on his better on LinkedIn.

3218
01:46:27.144 --> 01:46:27.816
I am the other two,

3219
01:46:27.817 --> 01:46:28.050
but I'm,

3220
01:46:28.409 --> 01:46:30.878
but I'm getting better at Insta.

3221
01:46:31.284 --> 01:46:32.706
Cause you know,

3222
01:46:32.707 --> 01:46:33.081
my daughter,

3223
01:46:33.128 --> 01:46:33.894
my wife told me to.

3224
01:46:34.665 --> 01:46:35.485
I fear no man,

3225
01:46:35.505 --> 01:46:36.427
but virtually all women.

3226
01:46:37.128 --> 01:46:38.749
And my wife,

3227
01:46:38.827 --> 01:46:39.351
yeah.

3228
01:46:39.851 --> 01:46:40.409
She tells me,

3229
01:46:40.729 --> 01:46:41.569
I grumble about it,

3230
01:46:41.570 --> 01:46:41.690
but

3231
01:46:42.772 --> 01:46:43.890
I was like my reen dance date.

3232
01:46:43.891 --> 01:46:44.077
I mean,

3233
01:46:44.116 --> 01:46:44.733
we've been together,

3234
01:46:44.976 --> 01:46:45.194
you know,

3235
01:46:45.218 --> 01:46:45.476
June.

3236
01:46:45.858 --> 01:46:46.296
Amazing,

3237
01:46:46.452 --> 01:46:46.616
man.

3238
01:46:46.679 --> 01:46:47.577
Yeah,

3239
01:46:47.655 --> 01:46:47.897
she's,

3240
01:46:48.101 --> 01:46:48.561
her dad,

3241
01:46:49.218 --> 01:46:49.843
there's so many stories.

3242
01:46:49.844 --> 01:46:51.905
Her dad fell asleep and I was asking if I could marry her.

3243
01:46:52.046 --> 01:46:52.202
Oh,

3244
01:46:52.265 --> 01:46:52.515
dude,

3245
01:46:52.608 --> 01:46:53.202
I got a story.

3246
01:46:53.249 --> 01:46:56.202
We'll share after we hit the top of the record,

3247
01:46:56.218 --> 01:46:56.343
man.

3248
01:46:56.483 --> 01:46:58.811
But he was a scout for the Cowboys.

3249
01:46:58.952 --> 01:47:00.515
And we went to lunch the next day and he's like,

3250
01:47:00.516 --> 01:47:01.171
I'm out drafting.

3251
01:47:01.172 --> 01:47:01.405
I'm like,

3252
01:47:01.452 --> 01:47:02.108
I want to play for you.

3253
01:47:02.741 --> 01:47:03.622
I want to marry your daughter.

3254
01:47:03.623 --> 01:47:04.483
He's like,

3255
01:47:04.484 --> 01:47:05.343
you can marry my daughter.

3256
01:47:05.362 --> 01:47:05.843
I'm like,

3257
01:47:06.745 --> 01:47:07.304
but I can marry her.

3258
01:47:07.964 --> 01:47:09.065
If I knock a draft,

3259
01:47:09.066 --> 01:47:09.288
I'm like,

3260
01:47:09.289 --> 01:47:09.706
if you draft me,

3261
01:47:09.707 --> 01:47:10.347
I wouldn't play for you.

3262
01:47:10.948 --> 01:47:11.409
But I can marry you.

3263
01:47:11.410 --> 01:47:11.628
He's like,

3264
01:47:11.651 --> 01:47:11.831
yeah.

3265
01:47:12.128 --> 01:47:14.354
And it was the most awkward lunch I've ever had.

3266
01:47:14.370 --> 01:47:16.136
And I called Amy.

3267
01:47:16.175 --> 01:47:16.433
She's like,

3268
01:47:16.434 --> 01:47:16.636
how'd it go?

3269
01:47:16.637 --> 01:47:16.878
I'm like,

3270
01:47:16.879 --> 01:47:17.597
it was horrible.

3271
01:47:18.354 --> 01:47:19.042
I mean,

3272
01:47:19.043 --> 01:47:19.698
he said yes,

3273
01:47:19.776 --> 01:47:23.745
but I've never felt worse about myself as a football player.

3274
01:47:23.995 --> 01:47:25.417
He pulled up my draft report.

3275
01:47:25.418 --> 01:47:25.636
He goes,

3276
01:47:25.698 --> 01:47:27.479
you're the third worst linebacker in the draft.

3277
01:47:27.480 --> 01:47:27.729
I was like,

3278
01:47:27.730 --> 01:47:27.886
what?

3279
01:47:28.684 --> 01:47:31.268
Like there's a tight end at Stanford that's never played linebacker.

3280
01:47:31.287 --> 01:47:31.967
He's better than you.

3281
01:47:33.151 --> 01:47:34.811
How do you know he never fucking played linebacker?

3282
01:47:35.412 --> 01:47:35.690
Yeah.

3283
01:47:35.691 --> 01:47:36.190
I was kidding.

3284
01:47:36.191 --> 01:47:36.393
Exactly.

3285
01:47:36.611 --> 01:47:37.151
But I didn't.

3286
01:47:37.174 --> 01:47:37.815
I was scared.

3287
01:47:37.830 --> 01:47:38.752
It's like the number four.

3288
01:47:38.877 --> 01:47:40.072
Her dad looked like a mean,

3289
01:47:40.135 --> 01:47:40.916
tasty casem.

3290
01:47:40.979 --> 01:47:41.721
He's Armenian.

3291
01:47:41.838 --> 01:47:41.994
Oh,

3292
01:47:42.440 --> 01:47:42.736
my God.

3293
01:47:42.737 --> 01:47:43.643
American top 40.

3294
01:47:43.644 --> 01:47:44.518
He's terrifying.

3295
01:47:44.955 --> 01:47:45.080
Well,

3296
01:47:45.081 --> 01:47:45.502
this is great,

3297
01:47:45.518 --> 01:47:45.643
man.

3298
01:47:45.644 --> 01:47:46.455
I'm proud of you guys.

3299
01:47:46.565 --> 01:47:47.861
I'm grateful for the effort.

3300
01:47:47.908 --> 01:47:49.330
I'm grateful to have been included.

3301
01:47:49.331 --> 01:47:50.002
Great to have you here.

3302
01:47:50.049 --> 01:47:50.424
Great to be here.

3303
01:47:50.471 --> 01:47:50.721
Austin,

3304
01:47:50.783 --> 01:47:51.221
good work,

3305
01:47:51.299 --> 01:47:51.549
man.

3306
01:47:51.705 --> 01:47:52.955
Austin's our guy out here.

3307
01:47:53.065 --> 01:47:53.330
Thank you,

3308
01:47:53.346 --> 01:47:53.471
buddy.

3309
01:47:53.627 --> 01:47:54.690
Full productions in.

3310
01:47:55.448 --> 01:47:55.768
Where are we?

3311
01:47:55.808 --> 01:47:56.089
Plano,

3312
01:47:56.189 --> 01:47:56.569
Texas.

3313
01:47:56.630 --> 01:47:56.930
Plano.

3314
01:47:57.030 --> 01:47:59.473
I'm going to create a thing now about Texas.

3315
01:48:00.153 --> 01:48:00.755
Don't be wrong.

3316
01:48:01.493 --> 01:48:02.153
You'll be reviewed.

3317
01:48:02.235 --> 01:48:02.634
You won't be.

3318
01:48:02.755 --> 01:48:03.016
Okay,

3319
01:48:03.075 --> 01:48:03.255
well,

3320
01:48:03.415 --> 01:48:04.735
I'll be forgiven.

3321
01:48:04.977 --> 01:48:05.337
You're wrong.

3322
01:48:05.376 --> 01:48:05.977
You're not lost.

3323
01:48:06.516 --> 01:48:07.001
All right.

3324
01:48:07.016 --> 01:48:07.141
Well,

3325
01:48:07.142 --> 01:48:07.298
hey,

3326
01:48:08.001 --> 01:48:08.704
for our audience,

3327
01:48:08.720 --> 01:48:09.579
thanks for tuning in.

3328
01:48:10.220 --> 01:48:11.509
Really appreciate you being here.

3329
01:48:11.587 --> 01:48:12.399
Thanks for listening.

3330
01:48:12.727 --> 01:48:13.571
You got something out of this,

3331
01:48:13.602 --> 01:48:14.384
which I know you did.

3332
01:48:14.430 --> 01:48:14.712
I mean,

3333
01:48:14.805 --> 01:48:16.321
so many gold nuggets there.

3334
01:48:16.322 --> 01:48:16.446
Yeah,

3335
01:48:16.447 --> 01:48:16.743
everywhere.

3336
01:48:16.837 --> 01:48:17.634
Share it with your friends,

3337
01:48:17.696 --> 01:48:18.009
family,

3338
01:48:18.055 --> 01:48:19.852
whoever else you feel might need this.

3339
01:48:20.071 --> 01:48:20.805
And thanks for tuning in.

3340
01:48:20.806 --> 01:48:20.899
Yeah,

3341
01:48:20.900 --> 01:48:21.571
leave us a review.

3342
01:48:21.899 --> 01:48:22.180
Thank you,

3343
01:48:22.196 --> 01:48:22.368
Clay.

3344
01:48:22.399 --> 01:48:22.571
Yeah,

3345
01:48:22.572 --> 01:48:22.774
man.

3346
01:48:23.040 --> 01:48:23.462
Everybody.

3347
01:48:23.618 --> 01:48:24.134
My pleasure.

3348
01:48:24.321 --> 01:48:24.602
Thank you.

3349
01:48:24.684 --> 01:48:25.205
Thank you.

3350
01:48:25.206 --> 01:48:25.625
Hold fast,

3351
01:48:25.685 --> 01:48:26.145
stay true.

3352
01:48:27.606 --> 01:48:28.707
Thank you for joining us today.

3353
01:48:28.926 --> 01:48:32.754
We hope you walk away with some new tools and insights to guide you on your life journey.

3354
01:48:33.310 --> 01:48:35.096
New episodes are being published every week,

3355
01:48:35.136 --> 01:48:37.484
so please join us again for some meaningful discussion.

3356
01:48:37.824 --> 01:48:38.648
For more information,

3357
01:48:38.750 --> 01:48:41.214
please check out mentalkingmindfulness.com.